Most Embarrassing Hobby Experience?

Gryphon's Avatar
This hobby creates many opportunities to make a total fool of oneself, and I'm sure many of us have done so. Here's my most foolish action:

I became very enamored of a pair of providers who posted frequently on a discussion board very similar to ECCIE. They had websites and one of them had a review on another site, but oddly enough neither of them had reviews on the site they frequented most. Nonetheless, I decided I absolutely had to see them, despite the fact that they were a couple of thousand miles away. So I found a professional conference in their city, signed up for it, made plane and hotel reservations, and emailed them well in advance to arrange appointments on multiple days. About a month before my trip, both of them stopped posting, their websites vanished, and I got robo-replies to emails. As it turned out, I had been utterly smitten with two online personas with no actual physical existence. I took several days off of work and traveled across the country to meet a pair of ladies who were never real. It turned out okay--the conference was very informative, and I made "Plan B" arrangements that led me to make the acquaintance of three lovely new friends. But I felt like a total fool for being so gullible.

Anyone else with "D'oh!" episodes?
So I was on a date things are going very well it was just the beginning and as an appetizer I always like go down and go to town. So Just when I think he;s ripe and ready to fuck he puts the condom on. But condoms aren't penises best friend.

Cock- "What the- What are you put on me? Are you tryin to suffocate me? I'm not gonna take any of this."

So he take the condom off so I can revive him up and Im doing that for a second and then my toungue and the roof of my mouth starts tingling and then it gets numb. I'm thinking maybe my mouth is just tired but then my cheecks start tingling and I stop and try to talk but I sound like my moth is filled with cotton. " Ah Canh Pheea Ma Koung" I was trying to say I cant feel my touge but I couldnt therefore I cant say it correctly. I go get a cup of water and he's asking me whats wrong and Im asking him questions but he cant understand me so he just puzzled. After i get a drink of water, I scramble on the floor trying to find the condom wrapper- ( he brought his own and we used that) when I found it I figured out why my mouth was numb.

CLIMAX CONTROL-- Which means it had something in it to numb his penis to stop him from cumming to quickly.

After I regained proper speech I thought it was hilarious but he couldnt stop apoligizing although it wasnt anyones fault at all.

"Please dont put this in your blog"

--" You've got to be kidding me, that was hilarious, I have to!"

He finally agreed to let me write what you are reading now, just as long as I didnt put down his name, which I never do of course. Because I a lady.

And I neve kiss and tell-- names that is.
DianaDeepthroats's Avatar
I just sat here with my mouth dropped open for about half a minute.
I'm trying to make men book conferences for me.
Wait, that wasn't the point.

ed_mustafa's Avatar
After a nice dinner and show at a big strip resort, we head back to my car to drive to my friends hotel. We go in the parking garage and where's my car? We go to a few different floors and nothing! She says we didn't take the elevator when we came. We walk back into the casino to look for another entrance to the garage or a different garage. No luck. We finaly ask a security guard if there is another entrance to the garage. Answer, nope. My friend is being a good sport but I can tell she's NOT happy. Her feet are hurting after walking back and forth, so I take her to the valet to wait while I look for the car. I said to myself, fuck it, I'm going to all the floors! Sure enough, it's right there by the elevator one floor above where we stopped looking!
awl4knot's Avatar
Gryphon,

Those faux providers didn't happen to be supposedly located in Miami? If so, I was looking for a similar excuse to go south.
ed_mustafa's Avatar
Gryphon,

Those faux providers didn't happen to be supposedly located in Miami? If so, I was looking for a similar excuse to go south. Originally Posted by awl4knot
Ahh, the sisters???
Gryphon's Avatar
Ahh, the sisters??? Originally Posted by ed_mustafa
Bingo.
Mine was fairly recent - While I've been in Denver. It was an early early early 9AM appointment in a highrise hotel. The room was on the 15th floor and I didn't think anything of, you know, shutting the blinds. My John arrives and halfway through our appointment I look out of the window and say "I think we are putting on a show". Sure enough, there were construction builders working on the building across the way just staring - some had binoculars. Needless to say the blinds were promptly shut and not opened again. Before I left the room, I peeked out of the blinds and sure enough, some were STILL looking. Lesson learned and now the story is to be chocked up to mortifyingly hysterical stories.
My most embarrassing experience, that I care to share:

To avoid needless parking hell, I agreed to pick my patron up in front of the venue.... He described himself and said he'd stay on the phone with me.

I saw a guy on his phone, matching that description... so I smiled at him and he smiled back, and then I smiled even more... and he came over to the car and said hello.

In slow motion, I realized that my patron, on the phone with me, was not the dude at my car's window who was on the phone with someone else.

The dude who was at my car window thought I was hitting on him. I told him that I had the wrong person and that I was really sorry. He wanted to know where X venue was and asked me for a ride. I asked him if I looked like a taxi cab, his response was to ask me for my number so we could hook up some other time (it was very confusing, I was also still on the phone with my patron). He asked me why I wouldn't give him my number... I am pretty sure he was drunk.

Just as things were getting really awkward, my patron appeared and slid in the passenger's door...
offshoredrilling's Avatar
SkylarCruzWantsYou LOL

Madison_Gable Rather than close the blind. Let them watch. After your date was gone you could have had fun with them. Or if you wanted to get back at them put up a sign with the wrong room number.
Madison_Gable Rather than close the blind. Let them watch. After your date was gone you could have had fun with them. Or if you wanted to get back at them put up a sign with the wrong room number. Originally Posted by offshoredrilling

That would be so evil!! but also Hilarious!!
ed_mustafa's Avatar
Madison_Gable Rather than close the blind. Let them watch. After your date was gone you could have had fun with them. Or if you wanted to get back at them put up a sign with the wrong room number. Originally Posted by offshoredrilling
That's good!
SkylarCruzWantsYou LOL

Madison_Gable Rather than close the blind. Let them watch. After your date was gone you could have had fun with them. Or if you wanted to get back at them put up a sign with the wrong room number. Originally Posted by offshoredrilling
I'm so SHY!
I've shared this with a few hobbyists. It was just like a scene you would see on "American Pie," it was so funny...although I sure didn't think so at the time.

I was touring not far from my home location. I prebooked in advance for two nights over the weekend, but at this particular location even the third party discounted rate site I booked through was no help with rate reduction. I settled for a comfortable 2 star hotel in the heart of the city I was visiting in. I arrived late and noticed there were not any towels in my room. I assumed (since the hotel was pretty busy) they would bring them by as soon as they were ready. It wasn't a problem because I wasn't due to see anyone until in the afternoon the next day.

So, the next day I wanted to take a shower. The towel/sheet guy (must have been 20-23 years old) was down about two doors. When I asked him for some towels, he said he would have to go all the way down stairs to get them for me. I replied simply I was going by the office anyway, and that I would grab some on the way. I went down to grab some breakfast (forgot the damn towels) and headed back up to my room. When I got back I realized I forgot them, I still had plenty of time before one o'clock, so I decided to straightened up the room a bit.

Now, this is where I was forwarned, but I didn't take the hint or realize the significants. While I was straightening the room, the maid knocked on the door but she came barging in before I could utter a reply. She offered her appologies. I told her no harm done, but could she give me some towels. She told me the towel guy had all the sheets and towels, but he was right down the hall. She went calling after him and poked my head out. The little sh*t had the towels in the bin after all.
Annoyed, I made sure to thank the maid louder than usual since towel boy was within ear shot, shut the door, and I decided to take a shower.

When I got out it was only 11. I'm usually a very busy person. I run an ametuer art site and I have a part time day job. Both committments plus family from time to time, it gets hectic. THis was my first REAL opportunity ALONE in quite some time. So I decided to stay undressed. I opened up my laptop, got my good friend BOB (this is not a person I'm referring too) and decided to ummm, well...I'm sure everyone gets the picture.

Right in the middle of a Featured Redtube porn and me, sprawled out on the bed, EVERYTHING showing and my BOB sounding like a damn lawn mower, this idiot towel boy, DOES NOT KNOCK,walks straight into my room. He stopped short when he saw me and I couldn't yell at him at first because I was so dumbfounded by my intruder's presence, I couldn't get Mr. Bob turned off. Finally, I said to hell with this thing, I looked at him and I could see the whites of his eyes. He was just standing there with this dumb look on his face. I was so embarassed! But, when I get embarassed it's not cute, I get mad! LOL! I said "Get the f*ck out! Why are you just standing there?"

He snapped back into reality, and stumbled out of the room yelling repeatedly his appologies. He stood outside my room by the door just saying "I'm so sorry, Ma'am are you okay? Really I'm sorry," over and over. I offered him no forgiveness at this point. I said "Get the f*ck away from my door and shut up now!"

I was livid. Two hotel employees walked in on me in one morning. That has never happened to me, not even once ever.

Let this be a lesson. ALWAYS double lock your hotel doors even when you are alone. You never know if or when you might want to have a session with yourself, lol.

Anyway, I did report him to the manager. Although, I didn't see the him until I turned in the keys the next day. I was still pretty hot. But, the manager seemed to have a smirk on his face. He nodded an appeasing apology, but the more upset I appeared to get, the more it seemed like he was fighting the urge to blurt out laughing. I find it hilarious now, but not at the time. I know that little sh*t knew I was in the room.
Ack, this kind of weird stuff happens to me all the time - just never in the hobby!
offshoredrilling's Avatar
Tabitha Bleu
I must be sick. My first thought was "you towelboy come here and move BOB for me"
Sorry I am sick.

Anyways my "Most Embarrassing Hobby Experience?" is lam compared to the stories so far in this thread. But it was not that bad in the closet as a no show ended up as a late show. So she hid me, to save for later.