Once a Provider/Hobbyist.....

Eccie Addict's Avatar
..... always a Provider/Hobbyist?

I've heard this a couple of times. Do you men/women really feel that way? I mean do any of you think that one can leave this world of ours and truly give themselves to an SO?

I believe I can......
London Rayne's Avatar
It depends on the driving force that has one here to begin with. If it's sex you can't live without even when you have someone, I don't think the guy would leave. If it's greed for money on demand....same thing. There is a difference between obsession and something you do part time.

I could without a second thought. I don't believe in cheating, so it would not be an issue. I think it's easier to believe a provider could leave because her drive to be here is not usually just a nut like with a guy. That urge is pretty hard to stop chasing once you see how easy it is to get for some men. I know a few men I have spoken to here ( you included ) that are ONLY here because they are single. I have no doubt if they found true love, they would not be here.
..... always a Provider/Hobbyist?

I've heard this a couple of times. Do you men/women really feel that way? I mean do any of you think that one can leave this world of ours and truly give themselves to an SO?

I believe I can...... Originally Posted by Eccie Addict
Absolutely. Learn something from providers so that you can become better with women, for a better relationship. Thats really why you see providers in the first place. Your skills in attracting women leaves a lot to be desired. Once you develope those skills or get your moxie back from what you may have had in the past and meet a great women to settle down with or spend time with and enjoy. You won't even think about any of the providers you've seen. At least I know I won't.
yes you can leave and be done ...its easy you just have to be ready to be with that one and only
Safire Sweet
Eccie Addict's Avatar
Really and truly the reason doesn't necessarily have to be to be with an SO but for whatever reason....
  • Doc75
  • 04-28-2011, 09:01 AM
You can leave. I have done so whenever I'm in a relationship where we're monogamous. I come back afterwards though.
Chica Chaser's Avatar
Last thing I remember, I was
Running for the door
I had to find the passage back
To the place I was before
’relax,’ said the night man,
We are programmed to receive.
You can checkout any time you like,
But you can never leave!
I have been both an escort and also have hired a male escort, now looking for a female escort for my husband and I to share some time with, I think once you are in this industry, it never leaves you.
roscoe14850's Avatar
I can say that I do this because I DO NOT want a relationship right now. But just like London I'm old school, don't believe in cheating, "love the one you're with"
Last thing I remember, I was
Running for the door
I had to find the passage back
To the place I was before
’relax,’ said the night man,
We are programmed to receive.
You can checkout any time you like,
But you can never leave! Originally Posted by Chica Chaser
Ah, so that was what the Eagles were singing about.

My feeling is that after a certain point, it becomes very hard to leave, to check out of this world and return to 'the real world.'

The mind begins to play with you, make you believe that this world is who you are. For a lot of people here, the split personality they are forced to develop because of the stigma of the hobby destroys them.

In the case of guys, the hobby is just simpler. Sure we can leave here and try true relationship, but when it fails, we run back to here, to a much simpler relationship - fork over the money and buy a relationship for an hour at a time.

For the ladies, the lure of the money and flexible hours, the ability to decide today to work harder (place an ad, answer a couple of more telephone calls, maybe post a few times on here to attract attention, work a couple of extra hours or a weekend) and voila, more money for that unexpected bill or the sudden desire for a vacation.

The other thing I have noticed, and I know a lot of ladies are going to attack me on this, but unfortunately it is very true for a lot of ladies, is all in their mind. After being here for a while, they develop a mindset that they are tainted goods. No decent guy would have them. So where else can they go. (I think having your face plastered all over the Al Gore's world wide web makes it much harder to escape the past)

Can it be done? Can you really leave the Hotel California, and enjoy that glass of wine from 1969? Yes, but think like a person in the witness protection program, you have to really distance yourself from this hobby life, create a new identity, or at least resurrect the one you had before you joined the hobby.
Eccie Addict's Avatar
Can it be done? Can you really leave the Hotel California, and enjoy that glass of wine from 1969? Yes, but think like a person in the witness protection program, you have to really distance yourself from this hobby life, create a new identity, or at least resurrect the one you had before you joined the hobby.
I agree with that....

I think that after a certain amount of time in this you would have to distance yourself from this life in order to purge yourself of it before you ever entered into a real world relationship. I think that goes for providers and hobbyists.

Fortunately being single allows me to be who I am. I don't need to have a split personalty. Not even amongst friends or family.
shorty's Avatar
It all goes back to the motive of being a Hobbyist or Provider. I believe its much easier for the guy that's single to leave the hobby for another lady in the real world, if he's truly committed to her. Will he come back to the HobbyWorld if the relationship fails? Probably!!

A Provider leaving the business for good is alittle more complicated. If the Provider is single, set finanically, or finds true love, YES!! Being a Provider is one way a lady can make fast money for an hr of helping a guy get a nut. Where else is a lady going to make 200-500hr with very little expense. Yes, a lady can make that much with a college degree, but how much did she put herself in debt doing that. As several of you Providers have stated before "Its About The Money"!!
London Rayne's Avatar
Last thing I remember, I was
Running for the door
I had to find the passage back
To the place I was before
’relax,’ said the night man,
We are programmed to receive.
You can checkout any time you like,
But you can never leave! Originally Posted by Chica Chaser
LOL love it! I do think he was referring more to a state of mind than the physical sense of being. I doubt I will ever recover fully from the mental aspect of this business.
I really think it depends on that person mindset. If they wanted out, it can be done.
whitechocolate's Avatar
I think for the Hobbyest, once you are used to variety, it is hard to break that habit no matter who is your new partner or reasons for quitting.
For the provider, a lot depends on her reasons for being a provider. For those into it solely for the money, she can break away if she has another source for that money or needs less. If she is truly satisfying some sort of sexual gratification, it will be hard to stop seeing "other men". If her motives for providing are complex and mixed which is probably the case with most gal, maybe or maybe not.