Pissed Providers and the NO Review

Poet Laureate's Avatar
I had a date with a provider last week and she gave me a review special. I told her that I write good reviews, and suggested she check out my review history. I also told her I would write an honest review. Apparently she didn't hear that part, and she may have misunderstood that when I said 'good reviews' I meant informative and well-written, whereas I think she heard 'good' as in 'I'll give you a Yes'. Of course I would never promise a Yes prior to a session.
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The review has been up a few days now. This morning before 7:00a I got a text from her, complaining about the No recommendation. This is only the second No I've written, and both ladies contacted me to complain. This morning she and I exchanged a few texts, then she announced that she's starting another thread about me (like that has me worried) so that no one will see me (she doesn't have nearly that much pull or reputation). Following that she blocked me, so my last message to her, which was that she should concentrate on improving her questionable skill set, didn't get through.
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The shame of it all is that I liked this girl. She was sweet, accommodating, and easy to talk to. She made me feel very comfortable and very much at ease. But when the skills aren't there, they're not there. Let's face it, not everyone can be Tom Brady. Some of us are, and always will be, Ryan Leaf.
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I sing the praises of the ladies I see when they deserve it. Check out my reviews of Luving Lola, Emerald7, and the now-retired Absolutely. I write honest overall reviews and give a Yes even if everything wasn't completely perfect, as some of my other reviews indicate. And once in awhile I have a bad experience, and since I did agree to review this girl, I reviewed her. Unfortunately for her, the result wasn't what she was looking for.
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So the question I have is...is this common? When a No is given, is it expected that the hobbyist will have to deal with a pissed-off provider? Is this why so many guys are hesitant to write an honest review and say No when No is indicated?
Toyz's Avatar
  • Toyz
  • 03-02-2013, 08:57 AM
I had a date with a provider last week and she gave me a review special. I told her that I write good reviews, and suggested she check out my review history. I also told her I would write an honest review. Apparently she didn't hear that part, and she may have misunderstood that when I said 'good reviews' I meant informative and well-written, whereas I think she heard 'good' as in 'I'll give you a Yes'. Of course I would never promise a Yes prior to a session.
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The review has been up a few days now. This morning before 7:00a I got a text from her, complaining about the No recommendation. This is only the second No I've written, and both ladies contacted me to complain. This morning she and I exchanged a few texts, then she announced that she's starting another thread about me (like that has me worried) so that no one will see me (she doesn't have nearly that much pull or reputation). Following that she blocked me, so my last message to her, which was that she should concentrate on improving her questionable skill set, didn't get through.
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The shame of it all is that I liked this girl. She was sweet, accommodating, and easy to talk to. She made me feel very comfortable and very much at ease. But when the skills aren't there, they're not there. Let's face it, not everyone can be Tom Brady. Some of us are, and always will be, Ryan Leaf.
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I sing the praises of the ladies I see when they deserve it. Check out my reviews of Luving Lola, Emerald7, and the now-retired Absolutely. I write honest overall reviews and give a Yes even if everything wasn't completely perfect, as some of my other reviews indicate. And once in awhile I have a bad experience, and since I did agree to review this girl, I reviewed her. Unfortunately for her, the result wasn't what she was looking for.
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So the question I have is...is this common? When a No is given, is it expected that the hobbyist will have to deal with a pissed-off provider? Is this why so many guys are hesitant to write an honest review and say No when No is indicated? Originally Posted by Poet Laureate

Providers are not supposed to be able to see reviews..(although we know they do)... IF she posted anything in the texts that leads to knowing she READ it, you should forward those to the MODS for action.

Reviews are sacred & need to be protected...they keep both parties honest & keep the providers...uh...providing.

Don't want a bad review? Dont give a bad session.
More specifically if you were pmed RTM it , that preserves the integrity of the forward ( shows it has not been modified ) . Write them honestly and let the chips fall where they may !
I've been an aspd/eccie member since 1998 and in all those years wrote only two "NO" reviews for much the same reasons as Poet. They were very nice ladies, but the skills just weren't up to par. I was repeatedly texted by both ladies asking that I edit my review. When I didn't...they really got upset.

Honesty does not go a long way on this board sometimes. In fact, one of the ladies was a "friend" of one of the local mods and he texted me suggesting it might be a good idea to edit and change the review recommendation to a "YES." I naturally declined out of board integrity.
Toyz's Avatar
  • Toyz
  • 03-02-2013, 09:26 AM
I've been an aspd/eccie member since 1998 and in all those years wrote only two "NO" reviews for much the same reasons as Poet. They were very nice ladies, but the skills just weren't up to par. I was repeatedly texted by both ladies asking that I edit my review. When I didn't...they really got upset.

Honesty does not go a long way on this board sometimes. In fact, one of the ladies was a "friend" of one of the local mods and he texted me suggesting it might be a good idea to edit and change the review recommendation to a "YES." I naturally declined out of board integrity. Originally Posted by txrancher1

Ranchhand got pissed, huh? "Board integrity" is, at times, an oxymoron...just sayin'
Alayna Seduction's Avatar
I was not pissed because of the NO. my phone still rings either way. I was upset because you mislead me. Why tell me your going to write a great review and thank me and make future plans when you are really giving a NO recommendation.

I would much rather you have been honest w/ me at the current time. Either way its really not a huge deal, I was just saying what was on my mind at the time,.which may have been impulsive, but oh well.

If it wasn't a good session, well that sucks but it is what it is. I have great sessions with most, mediocre sessions w/ some. So the fact that you wrote an honest review didn't bother me.

Maybe I should have kept my displeasure to myself....noted.

<3Alayna

P.s, yes i read the review....if I wasn't allowed to read them, they wouldn't show up on the forum....couldn't read the ROS just the top.
kSoze's Avatar
  • kSoze
  • 03-02-2013, 09:42 AM
Why tell me your going to write a great review and thank me and make future plans when you are really giving a NO recommendation. Originally Posted by Alayna Seduction
cause clients will tell you "whatever it takes" to get that pussy cheaper... "confusion" is very powerful tool here.


Reviews are sacred & need to be protected...they keep both parties honest & keep the providers...uh...providing. Originally Posted by Toyz
"they keep both parties honest" how so? I agree in keeping the "full review" private from maybe other providers but, the provider being reviewed should be allowed to see the "FULL REVIEW" otherwise how will she ever improve, and how can she dispute things that DID or DID NOT happen, things NOT on her menu, etc.?
Poet Laureate's Avatar
I was not pissed because of the NO. my phone still rings either way. I was upset because you mislead me. Why tell me your going to write a great review and thank me and make future plans when you are really giving a NO recommendation.
P.s, yes i read the review....if I wasn't allowed to read them, they wouldn't show up on the forum....couldn't read the ROS just the top. Originally Posted by Alayna Seduction
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There was no misleading, only misunderstanding. I don't need to mislead ladies in order to schedule a session, and I never said anything after the session about you getting a great review. I was disappointed then and I'm disappointed now. I didn't voice my displeasure at the time because that would have been awkward. I will give a mea culpa regarding how I phrased things. However, you, too, need to do a little owning up. As I recall, the future plans you speak of started with you calling me the next day so we could get together and discuss what would be in the review. Last time I checked, no call came the next day, or any day since. And like I texted this morning, the more I thought about it, the more I realized it just wasn't a very good session for me. It didn't start as a No; it evolved into one.
Poet Laureate's Avatar
"they keep both parties honest" how so? I agree in keeping the "full review" private from maybe other providers but, the provider being reviewed should be allowed to see the "FULL REVIEW" otherwise how will she ever improve, and how can she dispute things NOT on her menu? Originally Posted by kSoze
I couldn't agree with you more. At the very least, the provider being reviewed should be able to see everything. It would answer a lot of questions they have. Unfortunately, I think it would also cause a lot more of what is the subject of this thread, namely pissed off providers contacting the review's author.
Poet Laureate's Avatar
And just to be clear: there has been no indication that the lady in question read any part of the review that she shouldn't have. If anyone took that meaning, it's not what I was trying to convey. In her texts to me she referred only to comments that she would normally have access to.
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We might also take note of the fact that my No review makes it two of the last four on this provider.
Toyz's Avatar
  • Toyz
  • 03-02-2013, 09:52 AM
"they keep both parties honest" how so? I agree in keeping the "full review" private from maybe other providers but, the provider being reviewed should be allowed to see the "FULL REVIEW" otherwise how will she ever improve, and how can she dispute things NOT on her menu? Originally Posted by kSoze
Read for understanding...

Providers who list on eccie don't WANT to get "NO" reviews so they generally give good service to avoid that. To keep their reputations good. That is the single (or primary) reason eccie succeeds-a level of expectation balanced by a community that will cull the bad members (on both sides).

A single NO will affect the providers potential for customers. But..as expected...OP is quick to point out that "her phone continues to ring" but she felt the need to PM the client unsolicited & come her to defend what she supposedly doesnt see...

Hobbiests stay honest because if they write total BS reviews, the board will call them out on it.

Thus, my statement is true...

Now, to YOUR point...

I have suggested to the owners a long time ago that there should be a drop down bucket for each provider. Showing what you can EXPECT in each session. IE BBBJ, NO ANAL, COF, NO COT's...that way if anything is neglicted in the session, then consumer can rate based on non-compliance. Subsequently, if the user lies regarding lack of services the provider could challenge.

And lets be real...there are sufficient numbers of WK out there I doubt seriously that every provider who has ever gotten a NO has someone showing them the content... particularly when there is pimpage involved...
Alayna Seduction's Avatar
Owning up. Yeah it sucked, yeah i texted out if anger...Would it have been awkward? Maybe for you...I look at it as constructive criticism. If you are comfortable enough to spill your guts to me I'd assume you'd be honest w/ the crap-level of our session.

Eh, lesson learned. But not really since I can't see the ROS
knotty man's Avatar
well it seems to me ,that in this thread alone. both, a provider and a hobbyist have both misinterpreted what you said or meant.
i myself must confess that i too thought the same as the provider, from the 2nd sentence of your post. perhaps you should have said , i write accurate, or informative, or even eloquently factual reviews. instead of "good" which can be subject to interpretation (or was that your intent).
either way it seems someone with your handle (i dont know you) would have a better set of communication skills or atleast a better command of the written word.
again, this just isnt me. apparently several people have trouble following what you say
Poet Laureate's Avatar
i myself must confess that i too thought the same as the provider, from the 2nd sentence of your post. perhaps you should have said , i write accurate, or informative, or even eloquently factual reviews. instead of "good" which can be subject to interpretation (or was that your intent). Originally Posted by knotty man
I can't disagree...but please take note that I did follow up by saying that I write honest reviews...and if the review history had been checked out, the one glaring NO would have been seen, and the lady would have been forewarned.
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Anyway, now that the lady and I have had our say, I would like to get back to the purpose of the thread, namely how many other guys get negative communication from a provider when a NO is posted?
Toyz's Avatar
  • Toyz
  • 03-02-2013, 10:21 AM
My simplistic view on it is that "Review Special Rates" should not equal "Good Review". It simply means "I agree to write a review based on the merits of our time together"

If you are GUARANTEEING a good review because you got a lower rate, then what the fuck good is the review anyway?