First one is all thanks to our good friend Ender. He not only made my favorite person of the day for introducing this but also has left me with an endless fresh supply of debotchery:
http://guesshermuff.blogspot.com/
Second link was in the co-ed and first mentioned by a provider whos name slips my mind. Once again a great site and this one is safe for blowing off time at work.
http://www.textsfromlastnight.com/postings/index/page:1
(203):
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
^^Greatest line ever.
