When a female answers the phone...and other ways to mess up a perfectly good Saturday session...smh

This is not an alert, but a retelling of something that happened to me and a doubles partner today.

Backstory: I was emailed by a client of mine. In the past we had enjoyed a multi-hour outcall to his place. We had excellent rapport and a genuinely memorable time. He asked for 2 hour double with me and another lady I have worked with on occasion. In his e-mail, he listed two ways to communicate with him that were safe: email and phone (voice and text). He openly invited me to call him to confirm. Also, the last time I talked with him he told me that he was completely single (details about that seems legit).

We set up a two hour session today at 5pm at my incall. I talked to him twice on the phone this week, and we exchanged several texts; all was fine and dandy. Last night I talked to him and asked him to confirm with me by 3pm for our 5pm meeting. I would need that amount of time to get to my place and get set up. I would give him the address as well since I knew his commute would be pretty long.

3pm today...no texts or calls to confirm with me. 3:14, I text as ask "We still on?" No response. I need to leave by 3:30 to get to my incall and get set up for our session at 5. I call him at 3:20. It goes to voicemail. I send him a text at 3:21 and 3:23. At this point, I am let my doubles partner know I have not heard back from him. She needs at least an hour to drive to my place. I call again at 3:27 leave a message: "Hi ****, this is Marie. Are we still on? Me and my friend need to know because we need enough time to get to my place. Thanks."

At 3:33 I call once more. This time a female answers the phone. Yikes! I come up with another male name and ask, "Is **** available?" She responds, "There is no **** here. You have the wrong number." My response: "so sorry, thank you, goodbye."

I text my doubles partner and let her know what happened. We are thinking "holy crap, he musta gotten busted." We assume the appointment is a no-go. Poor guy. I had full permission from him to contact him as he had no females to worry about...hmmm

At 3:48 I receive a call from his number but fearful of who might be on the other end, I let the call go to voice mail. I check the voice mail and it is his voice, nonchalantly saying, "Hi Marie, sorry I missed your call. Call me back." I am thinking, "no way, I don't want to be in the middle of this guy's girl trouble."

At 3:52, he calls back, and I hesitantly answer the phone. He again sounds very non-chalant and apologizes for missing my call. I tell him that I hadn't heard from him and was calling him to confirm. I told him that a female answered his phone. He said, "What?" I repeated. He then says "Oh, I was visiting my mother. I must have been in the bathroom or something..." I politely tell him that I am no longer comfortable with going through with the session. I also remind him that he was supposed to contact me at 3pm so that I could leave on time, etc. He sounds disappointed and can't understand why I would want to cancel, reassuring me that he is single and there was nothing to worry about: "C'mon, Marie, it's me, we've met each other. You know me..." I explain that it is not normal for a female to answer the phone around the time when you should be getting ready for or confirming a session and that it made both me and my double's partner nervous. I was still a little startled that I had spoken to a female, but started to calm down a bit. Part of me said, "Yes, you know this guy (even if we only met one time for 2 hours). He's probably telling the truth, but what if??? And what if I bring problems for my double's partner as well by being too trustful?" I decide to give him the benefit of the doubt and tell him that I need to call my partner and ask her opinion and that I would call back shortly.

I call my partner, and we agree to go through with it, starting at 5:30pm instead. I call him back, and we agree all is good and we will meet at 5:30, and I would text him the address shortly.

I get all my stuff together to leave to my incall, but while I do so, I receive another text message from him saying, "forget it, now I am not comfortable." I respond, "okay." I mean what else could I do???

Did I do something wrong here? Is there anyone to blame? Naturally me and my partner are upset about how everything turned out.

1. He should have confirmed at the time I gave him.
2. He should not have let a woman answer his phone.

Now, my partner and I are out several hours of our time, without compensation, and he isn't getting any. Or maybe he decided to spend it somewhere else...

Thoughts anyone?
SCBOY's Avatar
  • SCBOY
  • 05-24-2014, 06:24 PM
You, did nothing wrong. He messed things up by not following the protocol that y'all had agreed on. I'm sorry things turned out the way they did.
Alyssa XOXO's Avatar
You listened to your instincts and ultimately he made the final decision. You didn't do anything wrong hon, hell you went the extra mile after a woman answered the phone. Sorry your day went like this
Sexy Katrina's Avatar
I don't think you did anything wrong. He was not following instructions in the first place.
It does sound like women troubles. Sorry that happened to you and your partner!!
Prime Time's Avatar
Too much thinking, not enough doing. You should have asked his mother for her fried chicken recipe.
kerwil62's Avatar
That's on him. Proper protocol wasn't followed.

He KNEW he was supposed to hit you back at 3pm and didn't.

And now you know he'll let anybody answer his phone, you may as well cut him off.
AlexisMoore's Avatar
Always, Always, listen to your gut instinct. Do NOT ever second guess it in this business. It keeps you safe.
I would of canceled and told him to look elsewhere. He should understand. He messed up, not you. But never let a guy talk you into an appointment. Instant red flag.
At 3:33 I call once more. This time a female answers the phone. Yikes! I come up with another male name and ask, "Is **** available?" She responds, "There is no **** here. You have the wrong number." My response: "so sorry, thank you, goodbye."

Thoughts anyone? Originally Posted by YummyMarie

^ I like that. You got your game trump tight but hopefully he was using an alias to begin with. One of my buddies tells his mistresses that if they're ever talking and all of a sudden he starts laughing and asking how's dad doing or some other random shit it means play the game "until I can hang up".

And no you did nothing wrong. In fact it appears you went above and beyond the call of duty too bad he didn't appreciate that.
Wakeup's Avatar
Here we go again...

The provider is always right, the hobbyist is always a shitheel...blah blah blah...

Do we need to go any further?

P.S.-Expected better from you...
Here we go again...

The provider is always right, the hobbyist is always a shitheel...blah blah blah...

Do we need to go any further? Originally Posted by Wakeup
I appreciate the sharings / lessons learned on either side and think they can serve as teachable moments for those less than astute.

and yes I've learned quite a bit. ;-)
You, did nothing wrong. He messed things up by not following the protocol that y'all had agreed on. I'm sorry things turned out the way they did. Originally Posted by SCBOY
I could have lived with a confirmation a few minutes late, but sheesh, I don't LIVE at my incall. I'm sorry it turned out the way it did too.

You listened to your instincts and ultimately he made the final decision. You didn't do anything wrong hon, hell you went the extra mile after a woman answered the phone. Sorry your day went like this Originally Posted by Alyssa XOXO
What sucks is I honestly believed him, but one little thing goes wrong in the process and bam...total buzzkill...meh...thanks anyways

I don't think you did anything wrong. He was not following instructions in the first place.
It does sound like women troubles. Sorry that happened to you and your partner!! Originally Posted by Sexy Katrina
I hate that it has to be so rigid in this game, but you're right: we have rules and protocol for a reason. I am hear to make men happy, not teach them how to follow directions, but it comes with the territory apparently.

Too much thinking, not enough doing. You should have asked his mother for her fried chicken recipe. Originally Posted by Prime Time
Holy Tebow, that reminds me, I'm hungry...and there's a churches just down the street! I like friend chicken, but I can't stand the clean-up when making it from scratch.
P.S.-Expected better from you... Originally Posted by Wakeup

LOL...even I have my moments. And, THANKS...I THINK
Out_of_Bounds's Avatar
Your broke no protocol and did nothing wrong. He should have been more mindful of the time.
But a suggestion if something like this happens again, make no mention of the woman answering the phone and proceed like nothing happened. If it getsthe guy in trouble come to find he does have an SO it's his own damn fault and has to deal with the fallout.
Your broke no protocol and did nothing wrong. He should have been more mindful of the time.
But a suggestion if something like this happens again, make no mention of the woman answering the phone and proceed like nothing happened. If it getsthe guy in trouble come to find he does have an SO it's his own damn fault and has to deal with the fallout. Originally Posted by Out_of_Bounds
But what if the chick is vengeful? What if she tries to cause problems for ME? I don't mess with that stuff because he was going to come to my permanant incall (fortunately I never got around to sending the address to him). We've all heard rumors about flyer campaigns and outtings...I didn't want to put myself in that position, and at minimum, worrying about the possibility is an inconvenience in and of itself. On top of that, business as usual is good, so why bother with the inconvenience if I'm not desperate for an appointment by any means for any amount of money?

Do I want my clients to get caught? No. If they do, will I blame myself when I have done my best to follow their rules of discretion? No.
Lexieinhouston's Avatar
Wow, sorry for you and your doubles partner, even if he couldn't confirm at the time, he should have sent a brief text saying to stand by or something until he could. It all sounds fishy, did his Mom sound like a young chick, lol? I hate frustrating days like this.



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