.......... not everybody in the hobby is a lady or gentleman. Whether disclosure is by pure accident or as a result of malicious intent, a case of TMI can have very disruptive consequences.
Originally Posted by algrace
You make a good point. However, this is about more than the hobby. It applies with any personal relationship, and you can't get any more personal than sex, whether it is in the hobby or in a personal contact in the real world.
I have always learned more personal items about a lady I am with than most intend to reveal. It is about the quiet way to ask a questions, and get someone to talk to you about personal things. They talk to me because I care, and because I care about the ladies I respect their personal information.
There is no worse way to attack another person than to use personal, and private, information to direct the attack. How else does the new media go after public figures, than by the use of information that should be private?
There is no more vicious attack than to use personal information against one you once loved. We see it all the time in divorce, and it is usually the ladies who are the most vicious. When they do so, they burn all the bridges and any hope of a cordial relationship after the divorce. They not only hurt the one they attack, they hurt themselves and others.
Personal information is private, and should be kept private.
Once, here on EEIC, I send a lady a PM & she responded. I answered to the address she sent me. Oh, did the stars fall out of the sky. She had send me her personal email, to which I responded, and she wanted to know how I got her personal email. A copy of her correspondence solved the matter, but my sincere apology and the assurance that her personal information would always just be between us put her at ease.
The hobby can be a very dangerous game for all of us. We all know of the numerous nut cases that exist in the real world, people who are not kind, and people who are in the hobby only because the fail in any other type of personal relationship. So, they have to pay for sex because no other woman would accept them in a real-world relationship.
The hobby is separate - and we know that. However, respect for people is the key consideration.
Girls, if a guy is only on a power trip, and wants to control - or hurt: and revealing personal information is nothing else. You have no obligation to see him. Do your research. A guy who would give out personal information does not deserve to be accepted by anyone in open society, and especially by anyone in the hobby.
A lady who would obtain personal information about a guy, and use it for blackmail doesn't deserve to work in the hobby. When the word about this gets out, all guys should avoid her no matter how attractive physically she may be.
JR