I can tell you only from what my wife who is black tells me from when she was a provider. Black men in general and not all black men, but in general they want to negotiate the price down or they will try and recruit them. It has nothing to do with their penis.
I think that dirtydog makes a valid point, and I feel the same way as the girl in the ad. It has nothing to do with any experience I have had hobby-wise, and more to do with experiences I have had in real life. White guys will (most of the time) take no for an answer.
Wow this sounds super racist, but the only men who have ever attempted to force me were....not white.
I don't find the ad offensive... some people just have had bad experiences with pimps, have a personal preference or have a boyfriend who does not like black men. Personally, I appreciate it when ladies advertise that they have an issue like this... lets me know who to not spend money on... last thing I need is a bad date because someone has an emotional hang up because I am black.
Having said that, I have run into one or two providers who have expressed having an issue with black males but agreed to have a date with me after meeting me. I don't try to negotiate the price for their time... i'm not trying to pimp them... i'm not hood or a thug but a professional and it shows. If other ladies don't want my business, I'm fine with going to someone else who is quite happy to see me.
or this, HIV infection
from the CDC
So, basically what this says is that 0.11% of black men have HIV (based off of 2008 statistics posted by the CDC) and of that 0.11%, 32% contracted the virus via heterosexual intercourse... which means that 0.037% of black males in the States are diagnosed with HIV. Wonder how many of those men are into the hobby? I would guess that number is somewhat lower than the 0.037%
also, the majority of providers (at least the ones I've been with) practice safer sex (no glove, no love). Which means that of that less than 0.037% there is a near significant percentage of successful condom operation--lets throw out that 62% of the time, the condom works leaving 38% of the time there is a failure or slippage of some sort. Which means that the odds of getting HIV from protected sex from a random black man coming to a provider is less than 1 in 10,000. To put that into perspective... you are 100 times more likely to die in a car crash over the course of your driving history than for a black man to give you HIV.
I recall the late, great Master Dennis commenting on girls that worked for him over the years and said a great number of the girls that didn't serve black men were because they dated black men in real life. And apparently most felt it was OK to see white guys in the hobby, but not black guys because of that. Can't say it's true, can't say it isn't. But it wouldn't sound any crazier to me than all the girls I've seen in the hobby that will give you a BBBJCIM, Greek, MSOG and all kinds of other acronyms but won't even LFK, let alon DFK.....because they only do that with their boyfriend. I don't see the logic there, but they do. So it could be something as simple as that...the girl in particular may not be racist she doesn't want to date guys that she might normally date.
So SillyGirl, basically what you are saying is that if you were to see a black guy, more than likely he'd probably treat you the same way? And because of that, you would just rule them out all together? A genuinely straight-edge black guy (nice, hard working, non-negotiating, non-pimp) will look at this and be turned away because you're grouping him in that same category as your real life experiences. It sounded super racist because it kinda was....just being honest.
As any business owner will tell you, they have the right to refuse service to anyone. We may not all agree as to why, but we should respect their decisions.
We all have our reasons why we see the people we see.
Guys, you have your preferences and try to stick with them as much as you can. If you only liked blondes with large breasts, I can't get upset with you because you won't see me. I'm not your type, no biggie. Some guys like 19 yr old girls, no provider over the age of 30 should get upset with you because of that.
So, why get upset with a provider who won't see you because you don't fit into her type of clientele?
No one likes to be sterotyped, but it happens. Its not always fair, but we can't force people/the world into thinking otherwise. We can try to change their minds by our actions or words, but its really up to them to decide.
MsElena, you're absolutely right. If you choose not to see someone (particular race, etc) STRICTLY because of personal preference, then I can totally respect that because personal preference is JUST THAT...you're personal preference (blonde, brunette, hispanic, Asian, etc).
What i'm mainly talking about and what I stated in my earlier post was different, which had nothing to do with strictly a personal preference so to speak. Personal preference means "I like white guys period." or "I like Asian girls because I find them sexy period." Nothing wrong with that.
Personal preference doesnt quite mean "I dont wanna deal with this particular group of people because i've been wronged by them in the past or I think they MIGHT act a certain way". I wouldn't go as far as saying "The blondes I have encountered in the past were extremely stupid, and for THIS reason, I refuse to see blondes". When a business owner refuses service to someone, then it's usually because of a good reason. If a black/hispanic/etc stole from a business owner in the past, should that business owner just flat out refuse business to that entire race? Yes it's his right to refuse service to ANYONE if he chooses, but how would that look...or make him/her look?
Hopefully this isn't seen as being written in a bad tone and in no way am I getting upset with anyone because a person has the right to see who they want whether it be right/wrong or whether I or anybody likes it or not. I'm just trying to find the logic in decisions like that.
So SillyGirl, basically what you are saying is that if you were to see a black guy, more than likely he'd probably treat you the same way? And because of that, you would just rule them out all together? A genuinely straight-edge black guy (nice, hard working, non-negotiating, non-pimp) will look at this and be turned away because you're grouping him in that same category as your real life experiences. It sounded super racist because it kinda was....just being honest.
Originally Posted by UnNameable_One
No I'm saying that if I am in a room with a naked black man, regardless of who he is and what he is like I suuuuuper likely to have a panic attack.
I have to agree with silly girl and elena. It is their preference who they see. This is a very intimate experience to have with anyone, regardless of race, color, creed, age or whatever reason. I have been excluded because of age and other reasons. Nothing personal, but the way it goes. It seems that those who have a problem with a providers decision to see only who she wants, are typically those who fall into the do not see list are more likely to attempt to be seen because they are "different" than the others. This makes either individual uncomfortable and will lead to an unsatisfactory experience in the end.
Each person has their opinion on who they see. Whatever that opinion is, it is theirs and who are we to question their comfort level. If someone doesn't want to see you for whatever reason they give, who cares, and move on. There are other fish in the sea.
I have to agree with silly girl and elena. It is their preference who they see. This is a very intimate experience to have with anyone, regardless of race, color, creed, age or whatever reason. I have been excluded because of age and other reasons. Nothing personal, but the way it goes. It seems that those who have a problem with a providers decision to see only who she wants, are typically those who fall into the do not see list are more likely to attempt to be seen because they are "different" than the others. This makes either individual uncomfortable and will lead to an unsatisfactory experience in the end.
Each person has their opinion on who they see. Whatever that opinion is, it is theirs and who are we to question their comfort level. If someone doesn't want to see you for whatever reason they give, who cares, and move on. There are other fish in the sea.
Originally Posted by kccountryboy
KcCountryBoy you totally missed what I said and the point that I was making as I ALSO agreed with MsElena, and basically said pretty much the same things that you said. No there is absolutely NOTHING wrong with having personal preferences. That's not what i'm arguing. If i'm black, and a provider doesn't want to see a black man and would rather see a white man, then that's totally fine because her preference is that white man. But if a provider (or ANYBODY) doesn't want to see a black man because she thinks black guys are a certain way, then it kinda goes beyond just personal preference.
And on that same note, like I said before, whatever reason she chooses not to see whomever, it's strictly her decision and totally acceptable because even though I may not agree with it, it wouldn't matter anyway because I wouldn't pursue a situation where I am not accepted. Which brings up another point as to you being wrong about those who have problems with providers' decisions typically being those who "...are more likely to attempt to be seen because they are different than the others" because anybody in their right mind would ALSO agree that they would rather not be placed in a situaton where they are not wanted.
And also, as earlier stated, my whole point was just to find the logic in certain decisions of that nature...which goes beyond just personal preference.
No I'm saying that if I am in a room with a naked black man, regardless of who he is and what he is like I suuuuuper likely to have a panic attack.
Originally Posted by SillyGirl
SillyGirl, u must have been in some pretty serious situations to have panic attacks....kinda goes beyond anything on this post. Sorry to hear that.