Miss V, Centaur & Bob Have a Threesome

Toyz's Avatar
  • Toyz
  • 08-29-2014, 05:00 PM
An original stage play in one act...

Before I launch into this improv writing, let it be known that Bob & Centaur are two of my favorite tricks on the board and Ms V is definitely one of my favorite prostitutes (notice sweetie that I didn't refer to you as a Hoogar, so I hope that meets with your approval and is noticed!)

Our play opens in Centaurs living room, the smell of fine Cuban Cigars, Hennessey & Rich Corinthian Leather permeate the air...Centaur greets each guest as they arrive...



As previously agreed, everyone disrobes and tosses their clothing in a basket at the entryway...{{{Where EFN is seen still hiding one week after her massive meltdown on eccie}}}



Centaur, debonair as always, pours each a glass of fine Cognac...(you ever HAD Congnac)? Tastes like fucking jet fuel in a glass...burn the hair off your ass and that's just from sniffing it...



The all three move to the living room, and take their places in separate fine leather chairs...



Centaur, Ms V & Bob all chime in at once as per predicated by the persistent charter of the league of Sesquipidalians "Let the verbal debauchery begin"!



But first!!! LET THERE BE FOREPLAY!!



And Fiveplay!!!



And...of course....snacks were served before the action.




And now...our play.

Ms V:

Bob, I heard you overcame Ablutophobia recently?

Centaur:

I think I'm getting a stiffy...

Bob:

Affirmative Ms V, 'Twas a lingering malady that prefaced my futher issues with Arachibutyrophobia.

Centaur:

Oh My Imagined Diety...I am supremely wooded now...

Ms V:
I too am aware of an increasing moistness in my 'nethers...

Centaur:

Ms V, I have it on good authority that you are an accomplished Batrachophagous?

Bob:

Oh goodness...my penile tissue is expanding prodigiously beyond the boundaries of physics.

Ms V
Yes, Centaur that is true! I find the practice coincides with my love for all things amphibian in nature! {{{moves her fingers betwixt her thighs}}} Your
Blandiloquence is most appreciated kind sir!

Bob:
I wonder if you knew that TS-SL suffers from acute & terminal Cacodemomania?

{{{Centaur & MS V begin syncopated REM (Rapid Erotic Movements) with their hands...}}}

Ms V:
And that Eryn has feared from a young age
Defecaloesiophobia...

{{{Massive pud pumping starts in the boys chairs, while Ms V continues the sexual advances...}}}

Ms V:
Gynotikolobomassophile!!
Flibbertigibbet!!
Ithyphallophobia!!


Centaur:
MY IMPENDING EXPOSION IS NO LONGER INCIRCUMSCRIPTIBLE!!

Bob:
NOR IS MINE! MY TESTICLES ARE BECOMING JACULIFEROUS!

Centaur:
AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!
Bob:
AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!
Ms V
AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!

Ms V:

Gentlemen, that will be $37.50 each please...





{{{FROM THE BASKET COMES THE VOICE "You know in a legal world you wouldn't have to hide in Centaurs living room & would be able to practice your sexual wants in a free & open society not restricted by the puritanical views of a bunch of lawyers, johns & disapproving wives who probably have better drugs than me for calming their nervous systems when they feel the need to piss in the wind and vent all the...curtain lowers as EFNs voice fades into the blackness}}}
Centaur's Avatar
Must. Not. Correct. Grammar!

{In English the suffix -ous is used to form adjectives. As such, words ending in it typically aren't meant to be deployed as nouns.}

En passant I just want to point out that heavens forfend I should ever insult Miss V and Bob with anything so gauche as Cognac, the posh exclusivity of which has been ruined by marketing to the arriviste parvenus of popular music culture. We would be drinking bas armagnac, perhaps a '67 or '79 Castarede...
Toyz's Avatar
  • Toyz
  • 08-29-2014, 05:43 PM
Must. Not. Correct. Grammar!

{In English the suffix -ous is used to form adjectives. As such, words ending in it typically aren't meant to be deployed as nouns.}

En passant I just want to point out that I would never insult Miss V and Bob with anything so gauche as Cognac, the posh exclusivity of which has been ruined by marketing to the arriviste parvenus of popular music culture. We would be drinking bas armagnac, perhaps a '67 or '79 Castarede...
Originally Posted by Centaur
OMG!! My friend...I thought "centaur will see some error in sentence structure, or phrasing & rather than appreciate the fun will see the need to use his red pen & deduct points from my total score".

I luv ya man! You keep me chuckling more than you could ever know...thanks for being you!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_0hPFDmoVyo
Centaur's Avatar
I'm just glad most everyone has gone home for the day lest I be asked to explain precisely at what I was laughing off my caudal reserves of polysaccharides.
Toyz's Avatar
  • Toyz
  • 08-29-2014, 06:09 PM
I'm just glad most everyone has gone home for the day lest I be asked to explain precisely at what I was laughing off my caudal reserves of polysaccharides. Originally Posted by Centaur
*Awesome*

And for those who don't want to go to the trouble of googling the words in our play, here they are....(yes they are all real words)

  • Ablutophobia: Fear of washing or having a bath
  • Arachibutyrophobia: One having fear about peanut butter sticking to the mouth roof
  • Batrachophagous: A person who eats frogs
  • Blandiloquence: A flattery or complimentary speech
  • Cacodemomania: Pathological belief of one being inhabited by an evil spirit
  • Defecaloesiophobia: Fear of painful defecation
  • Gynotikolobomassophile: One nibbling a woman's earlobes
  • Flibbertigibbet: Gossipy person, usually referring to a young woman
  • Ithyphallophobia: Fear of aroused male genitalia
  • Incircumscriptible: Incapable of being restricted
  • Jaculiferous: Bearing arrow-like thorns
fun2come's Avatar
Awesome ... but I think the basket pic made me into a basket case and induced a month long Coma ... Will even have less luminescence than usual... carry on
Mr Peabody's Avatar
Toyz, Magnifique!!
I did notice your casting flaw... nobody to serve the sammiches.
Toyz's Avatar
  • Toyz
  • 08-29-2014, 07:41 PM
Toyz, Magnifique!!
I did notice your casting flaw... nobody to serve the sammiches. Originally Posted by Mr Peabody

What do you think the bitch in the basket was for?

*Awesome*

And for those who don't want to go to the trouble of googling the words in our play, here they are....(yes they are all real words)

  • Ablutophobia: Fear of washing or having a bath
  • Arachibutyrophobia: One having fear about peanut butter sticking to the mouth roof
  • Batrachophagous: A person who eats frogs
  • Blandiloquence: A flattery or complimentary speech
  • Cacodemomania: Pathological belief of one being inhabited by an evil spirit
  • Defecaloesiophobia: Fear of painful defecation
  • Gynotikolobomassophile: One nibbling a woman's earlobes
  • Flibbertigibbet: Gossipy person, usually referring to a young woman
  • Ithyphallophobia: Fear of aroused male genitalia
  • Incircumscriptible: Incapable of being restricted
  • Jaculiferous: Bearing arrow-like thorns
Originally Posted by Toyz
Thanks, I needed that........

  • Ithyphallophobia: Fear of aroused male genitalia
Yep, that's me^^^^^^^^^^^^
Miss Valentina's Avatar
LAUGHING. HARD. CAN''T BREEEEEFFFF!!!!
Beagle's Avatar
*Awesome*

And for those who don't want to go to the trouble of googling the words in our play, here they are....(yes they are all real words)

  • Ablutophobia: Fear of washing or having a bath
  • Arachibutyrophobia: One having fear about peanut butter sticking to the mouth roof
  • Batrachophagous: A person who eats frogs
  • Blandiloquence: A flattery or complimentary speech
  • Cacodemomania: Pathological belief of one being inhabited by an evil spirit
  • Defecaloesiophobia: Fear of painful defecation
  • Gynotikolobomassophile: One nibbling a woman's earlobes
  • Flibbertigibbet: Gossipy person, usually referring to a young woman
  • Ithyphallophobia: Fear of aroused male genitalia
  • Incircumscriptible: Incapable of being restricted
  • Jaculiferous: Bearing arrow-like thorns
Originally Posted by Toyz
Wow, and I thought you'd made those words up initially. Memorizing these words as we speak.....gonna use these to overwhelm the intellect of the next unsuspecting victim.....
playingnthedark's Avatar
Toyz, you are truly one of a kind. Thanks for the ongoing laughs.
Toyz's Avatar
  • Toyz
  • 08-30-2014, 08:10 AM
Toyz, you are truly one of a kind. Thanks for the ongoing laughs. Originally Posted by playingnthedark
Thank you PID!!

Its a fun creative release for me on mostly socially taboo subjects. The hope of mine is that most get a laugh out of some of the stuff I post & it makes their day better.
Bob McV's Avatar
Ohh my! I don't know what to say. While I have never suffered hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliop hobia or macroxenoglossophobia I must admit that I may have a slight case of erythrophobia and am now at a loss for words.

They say you only roast the ones you love and around here that comes with a price tag, I'll expect a money order for 37.30 soon.
Toyz's Avatar
  • Toyz
  • 08-30-2014, 10:34 AM
Ohh my! I don't know what to say. While I have never suffered hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliop hobia or macroxenoglossophobia I must admit that I may have a slight case of erythrophobia and am now at a loss for words.

They say you only roast the ones you love and around here that comes with a price tag, I'll expect a money order for 37.30 soon. Originally Posted by Bob McV
Of course Bob! I knew the 3 of you would understand and enjoy the joke.

BTW I gave your money to SexyLatina69, just ask her to deduct it from her donation next time you see her.

But think about it...notoriety is cool here...some of my most erotic moments (which I've mentioned before) were with my #1 ATF. She would talk dirty to me in a very obscure foreign language (yes it was real) while we had our fun..

You & Centaur could do that too! Just use obscure never used huge words & turn your hoogar on while performing various carnal acts. Before long, you might even get offered discounts for dirty high brow verbiage!

ToYz....working tirelessly to improve your sex life....