You know you're kinky when...
...you keep fake hanging plants around the house, just so your mother will never know what all those hooks in the ceiling are really for
...someone refers to a serial killer as sadistic and you roll your eyes, because the man has nothing on you.
...you realized you've charged more in lingerie than you get paid in a year
...you have more toys than your kids
...you take up macrame, just to learn some new knots
...you start rating your CDs by how interesting it'll be to beat someone to
...someone asks how long you've been doing this ponygirl routine, and you snort and start to stamp your foot
...your favorite dessert is hot crossed buns...and you don't eat sweets
...someone says they have a leatherman, you almost say "me too!" before you realize they are talking about the tool gadget on their belt.
...you watch a movie where someone gets tied up and scream at the screen, "Gimme a break, 3 minutes max to get out of that!"
...you go to the local county fair and salivate when the horsejumps are set up.
...you have a list by the phone for the babysitter....Hospital, Family, and 3 24-hour locksmiths.
...you are on a first-name basis with all the local EMT's.
...you have the closest 24 hour locksmith as #1 on your speed dial list.
...you join the SCA just so you can learn to make your own chainmail and work with leather!
....you speak of crop rotation with someone, and they aren't a farmer.
...you try to get arrested, just for the handcuffs , body cavity search, humiliation scene and time in the cage.
...Avon tells you stop writing, they are not going to make eau d'leather aftershave
...vanilla means anything BUT a flavoring for ice cream!
...leather companies start giving you the wholesale to distributor discount.
...you can't pass a candle factory without drooling (or wetting your seat)
...your kids ask you about conditioning leather....and it takes you a minute to realize they are talking about their baseball gloves.
..."chain letter" has a whole different meaning to you.
...you haunt the dollar stores for "pervertibles"....and Home Depot!
ADD YOURS!