Im sorry your ref didn't get back with me in time.

This is for the gentlemen, however ladies can chime in to.

You have seen provider A
You want to see provider B

You give Provider A info to provider B, so you can get screened. You schedule your appt well in advance in hopes you get screened in plenty of time.

Provider A never returns her calls, emails, etc....

Do you say forget it and see Provider A.


Just curious
I mark provider A off the list.

This is why I joined p411.
I would be upset with provider A. I would not see her again if her lack of response prevented me from seeing provider B. That is the nature of this business. Provider a may also have this come back to bite her in the ass when she needs to check references
U.R.L.'s Avatar
never see provider a again
allofamber's Avatar
Provider a may also have this come back to bite her in the ass when she needs to check references Originally Posted by Bubba3452
so true...
time for Plan B.....a provider you have already seen!!!
warlock's Avatar
If I use provider A as a reference for provider B and provider A doesn't respond to provider B, then I'd like provider B to let me know she didn't hear back from provider A, so that I can provide additional or alternate references.
Nothing gets a provider put on a 'burn notice' faster than being unresponsive. If I've chosen to see a provider, given her some solid references, a cursory check on her part, in this case provider A not responding, and provider B not giving me a heads up is not only bad business, but rude. Maybe provider A is out of town, or dealing with personal business more important than vouching for a client, not to mention the competitive ramifications between providers, then provider B should say the references didn't check out, or couldn't be verified, and does the client have others.

Yeah, I know its a utopian perspective, but I'm still an optimist despite past experience.
P411 will solve all your issues.
I agree with both warlock and babydollsnow.....although I may add that with the dependability of MANY providers, even if provider A vouches for him to provider B, it would be behoove a hobbyist to have plans B, C, D, and E as well. And, BTW, P411 does not solve ALL your issues! Alot of those providers that are P411 and "accept P411" are just as bad as the ones who do not as far as dependable and promptness goes, now I am not saying all providers are like that, especially the ones that respond to this, they are always on time and NEVER NCNS, (LOL)! And most of those "experiences" go unreported and not told to anyone, (I thought that is what this board is for).

Do the multiple "plans" when you are hobbying each and every time, it will make your hobby experience better.
First up,I would like provider B to inform me that provider A did not respond/give reference. That way,atleast I know that provider B tried but could not work it out.

Then,I would send an email or PM to provider A asking her as to why she did not give a reference or respond to provider B's request. If I get no response from provider A or if she suggests it is b'cos of competition and maybe anger that I am not seeing her instead,then that's the last of provider A. I will never see her again.

But if there was a genuine reason or if she was busy with other stuff and she states that she would follow up with provider B and give the reference-then that's great. And guess what-- she has a regular repeat client due to her professionalism.
MaxiMilyen's Avatar
I could give a list of provider names as long as my arm, who do not return reference requests, but I'll refrain at this time. Returning a request 4 days later or not at all means the "lady" ain't taking care of her business as she should. There are too many communication devices out there in this day and age for that to even wash with me. I also do tell the gents that maybe the lady he gave is not a good reference source and he should try using others.

There are also, the gents who contact several ladies at once ( Plan A, B, C, and D) and schedule with each, but then cancel with all but one when the time comes. So, all this "planning" is great, unless you're the lady who gets the cancel more than once. Those emails now go unanswered from the gent who tried that with me twice. I don't mind being plan B, C, or even D, but I do mind being in the middle of preparing for a date and getting that last minute cancel email, and I also do mind that I may have turned down being someone's Plan A, because I had already planned the time with multi planner man.

So much hit and miss in this biz, for both sides....LOL
I love the guys who have plan A and plan B, that happen today. He emailed my buddy and I both for an appt. Wonder does he know, we know he emailed both of us. Ahehehe.


Thanks Gents for the responses. I was curious. P411 is nice, but its not widely used everywhere, especially in small towns. Gents if you are going to use a ref, call her or pm her, so she knows what to expect. And you even get to find out how she reacts to you seeing someone else.


I could give a list of provider names as long as my arm, who do not return reference requests, but I'll refrain at this time. Returning a request 4 days later or not at all means the "lady" ain't taking care of her business as she should. There are too many communication devices out there in this day and age for that to even wash with me. I also do tell the gents that maybe the lady he gave is not a good reference source and he should try using others.

There are also, the gents who contact several ladies at once ( Plan A, B, C, and D) and schedule with each, but then cancel with all but one when the time comes. So, all this "planning" is great, unless you're the lady who gets the cancel more than once. Those emails now go unanswered from the gent who tried that with me twice. I don't mind being plan B, C, or even D, but I do mind being in the middle of preparing for a date and getting that last minute cancel email, and I also do mind that I may have turned down being someone's Plan A, because I had already planned the time with multi planner man.

So much hit and miss in this biz, for both sides....LOL Originally Posted by M A X
My plan B (rarely used) is to madly search the internet (ECCIE) on my phone. If one sticks with mature (over 35) providers, plan B is hardly ever needed. Some youngsters on the board have well earned, good reputations (Tara, etc). I really don't want to paint all with one brush.
Guest032213's Avatar
always help our hobbyiest men out ladies, they give us the info we need, dont get twisted cause he wants to feel on another bootayyyy, be real! xooxxo LEXUS