Love , It Changes with age but it is still LOVE

HMFICDICK's Avatar
Here I am a SENIOR CITIZEN. When I was under 11 or 12, Love was Mom and Dad. Not a lot of problems. Mom and Dad loved me and I loved them. Then came Puberty, Oh boy, What a ride. She is cute, Does she like me? Do I look Ok, AM I sexy?, ... after I lived through all the ups and downs of that came the 17 to 20, Oh God why doesn't she like me, She likes me, what do I do now. Do I like her?; How much do I like her? Do I want to spend my life with her? (someone with no real concept of age and how long is life}. You get through that and hopefully make the right choice. and start a Family. Thats where you learn a lot about life an how hard things can get and how good are the choices you both made. Then come children and you learn how much your parents loved you{ you really could never understand until you had children of your own}. So you go to lots of concerts, plays, science fairs, PT meetings. Graduation, they are off to college and lives of their own.. you try not to interfere but help when right. Ok they are married. yay. Now we can get to us. but you find there is not much US left. you have both been working so hard at getting the kids going that you didn't cultivate the US. So. Catch up time. CAN YOU?, But she does not want to have sex anymore...He doesn't care about me anymore... Yes but how do you handle it? Find something you do together and work at it hard........Doesn't work. Try to find a cure for her lack of interest.... There are some, but you have to want to in the first place or it doesn't work. You want to make love with your wife but she just rejects all advances. It has been a long time...Not weeks, not months, what do you do? After a few years you start to look for some excitement, No you arn't lookeing for nookie, you are looking for the companionship you had with her that she no longer wants to give. What do you do?
parkerplayer's Avatar
Too many people live for their kids these days. Whatever the kids want and whatever the kids want to do, they get. The focus of any marriage must be on the marriage first. This means kids come in second. Funny thing is the kids will learn to respect this and not know any difference if it is what they see their whole lives. Also, the kids will learn to apply the same life to their marriages.

Good luck finding that first love again. Happens to couples all of the time; they focus on life and not each other for years and suddenly wake up to find they are in a different position than they wanted to be.
HMFICDICK's Avatar
I am trying to make clear what it is that I have sought. Of course I like sex, but what is more important to me is the closeness, the oneness, that is in a relationship that is missing at home. I don't want to have a REAL girlfriend, because that would end up destroying my marriage and the woman I still love very much. I am trying to find the woman who I can hold and feel like she actually wants to be there with me and hugging me and touching me all over, as I felt with my wife. This is something that I realize is extremely hard to find. The problem is once you find it you can't let it go at just once in a while and put it out of your mind the rest of the time. (Yes I found someone like that Who it was is immaterial , since it would of necessity be different for anyone else. ) So here you have a dammed if you do and dammed if you don't situation. How do you separate yourself from this second woman who gives what no longer exists with the first and maintain your sanity. By the way, the second woman is a provider who does not in any way try to hold move into the number one position, if fact makes efforts to push you away and make you realize she is what she was when you met her, a provider.
  • MrGiz
  • 09-20-2015, 08:08 PM
Well... if you've been lucky enough to find one, two... or maybe even a few high quality, no strings, temporary, discreet, female mistresses to truly enjoy time with... there are worse conundrums to suffer through!
You maintain by not falling in love with her (your provider)..I think you may have gotten attached to the intimacy that she provided for you because you've missed the passion, lust, and feelings of that high that love gives someone when they think that they've met their soulmate (your wife)..the question you need to ask is How do you get your soulmate to understand that you miss that lust, passion, and high that you have lost when focusing on the kids, bills, and every day life stresses to get where you are today? Also, how can you get her(wife) to go back and want to please you like when you first met without making her feel uncomfortable or like shes not enough? I don't have the answer but she's your wife & soulmate maybe you need to approach her like you did when you first met her go back and think about what turned her on!??. I believe that if you don't use it you lose it and maybe shes just lost it.. I hope thats not it because i am a sucker for true love, soulmates, and finding your true love and it sounds like to me that you have a very good 🚺( woman)..good luck and if you need to talk you can always PM me!! Good luck babe ×o×o Kk
HMFICDICK's Avatar
I wish it were easy as starting to court my doll again. Unfortunately, when age creeps up on you and you don't realize what you are loosing as you loose it the loss becomes permanent. Even though I have not lost my desire for sex, she did. I have never forced or even pushed hard to have sex with any woman, before I met her or after she stopped. Perhaps if I had insisted more while she was loosing her desire(libido), she would have gotten some treatments or something that her wanting would have stayed to some extent. But I didn't push. So, after 15 years of hoping I gave up and started seeing providers. Since we are now over 65 the condition has become permanent. I really feel she knows what I am doing, but has never brought it up. Actually I kind of wish she did know. I have started to consider starting a service to get some of the girls I meet into a better situation and away from the more destructive people they get involved with. But bringing it up with her is very hard. I know most of you will not believe me when I say I am worried about a lot of the girls I meet and would like to help them get out of the business and into some education and good jobs, but it is true. I try to help them by encouraging them to go to school etc. but I just don't have a good way to help them without helping them to learn how to manage their money and screen out the bad types who prey on them. I see where some people write and deride people who care as white knights or doing an operation save-a-hoe. So Im a sucker. Ok then that's what I am. But I sleep better for it. So, all you wood be white knights or ladies who would like to be saved or helped. What do you recommend? I guess my greatest problem is I love women, not just Lust women, love them, care about them and want to help them, if they want help......as UN-PC as that is. Im too old to give a shit about PC.