Why don't all working girls offer DFK, aka deep French kissing?
Slow, sensual, tentative-to-titillating exploratory lip-locking is often thought of as "too intimate." Rather a paradox, if you ask me, considering how "intimately acquainted" a lady's body parts become with a gentleman's privates. DFK is also time-consuming if done right, and it's faster for both parties to drop drawers for quickie sex or a certain weather-related acronym.
Those providers who advertise GFE yet do not allow DFK are a total mystery to me. I LOVE to kiss! Long and deep and like the world is standing still.
So, without further ado and just in time for tornado-prone hurricane season 2016, with apologies to the Fujita Scale, I present the following:
The Fancy Funjita Kissing Scale
F0 - Well, I felt your lips, but nothing else.
F1 - Pleasant and welcome like a spring breeze, but otherwise unremarkable. My hair and dress got ruffled. No damage done.
F2 - Broadcast body alert: Suction and hormone levels increasing. Oral defenses going down. Blouse buttons and trouser zippers weakening as atmospheric conditions heat up. Starting to hear the roar of my pulse.
F3 - My toes curl and my socks blow off, not to mention my skirt, panties, bra... Inhibitory walls fail. Chills going up and down my spine, and there's a gush of moisture between my legs. Help me; I'm falling and don't want to get up. Let's play twister!
F4 - Gale of passion. Widespread destruction over my bedspread. Lay me down like a Mississippi trailer. Total devastation of all thought processes. Call FEMA; I need recovery assistance.
F5 - Completely blown away. Take your money; I'm paying YOU.