Hey Married Hobbyist Why do it ?

If youre married, why hobby ? You know whats at risk. If you get caught youre going to get skinned in divorce court. Soon as your soon to be ex wifes attorney mentions you were cheating on her with call girls, youre screwed.

Kids aren't going to be too happy I'd imagine stepping out on mom with professionals.

Even your job may not be safe, if you work for some snobby judgmental types. They'll burn you down without a second thought despite years of loyal hard work. I'm sure they won't come out and directly can you, they will feel the need to play those games upper management likes to play. But that will be the root cause.

Maybe you own your own business but guess what your going to lose in the divorce.

So why not get divorced now, while its still somewhat on your terms, then you can play without worry ?

Divorce law is draconian I know. but if you initiate it, you can make preparations ahead of time, soften the blow as it were.

First of all Hobster, divorce is very expensive....because it's worth it!! Secondly, I hobby because my wife bears little resemblance to Sandra Dee - except when I have my eyes closed - then she looks just like her!!!

+ 1

He must not be married.........

He must not be married......... Originally Posted by i'va biggen

And Never will be as long as divorce laws are the way they are. Nothing like having kids losing them then paying for the privelidge every month to have their mother convince them to hate you.

One guy told me about marriage and divorce. If you want to practice think of the person you hate most in the world, then send them half your paycheck every month.

Been in LTR , never really considered stepping out though, but that may be different than some guy married 20 yrs.

Still that's a lot of risk you guys take

I hobby because the ladies here will do what my wife won't.

Yep. Wifey don't give head!

This might be the dumbest question on the internet. But I'll give it a shot.....

1. I'm male

This might be the dumbest question on the internet. But I'll give it a shot.....

1. I'm male Originally Posted by SmallWonder

Oh you don't like that one, ok. How about one specifically for you then

. Have you been a dipshit from birth or is it a recent practice ?

Kinda have to agree with hobgoblin there. So being male now means that we are supposed to be womanizing bastards that do little more than screw everything in sight?

A little rediculous to put it out there like that.

There are many reasons people may or may not hobby. "I'm Male" is a bad one. Honestly I don't understand why someone would hobby while married without atleast a consenting partner. If your married sex life isn't right, it is worth a discussion. Either compromises are made to bring joy to both parties or you most likely are no longer compatible.

I very rarely hobby but when I do, it is because I seek a nice enjoyable time with someone who is professional about it and not just a bar girl who may or may not be terrible. After all, I assume a bar girl that I can get easily has been easily seduced by others. No information to tell you what you might get. Working ladies on the other hand have a reputation to uphold. Their business won't flush if they are not careful with regards to sti's. I see it as the safer bet. Not to mention how easy it is for any bar girl to have one drink, regret the decision, and claim rape. Fucks up a guys life pretty quick. I have little trust for random people. Atleast in the hobby we get reviews and information before we go there.

Fair enough.

In my situation, my wife has been disfigured and disabled by cancer and is unable to perform. She has no breasts and a number of other physical issues. She would not be happy knowing I'm "cheating," in spite of the fact that she knows she can't do the job.

(Fuck Cancer)

There is no way I'm going to be "that guy" who divorces a seriously ill wife. So, it's either become a hobbyist or become celibate. Which one would you choose?

That said, it is for more common for men to dissociate "sex" from "love" and cheat on his wife/SO while still loving his wife/SO and not wanting to leave her. Women are far more likely to associate "sex" and "love" as being intertwined. That's why there are approximately 3 million men on Ashley Madison for every 1 legitimate (not a bot) woman. Its also why men are willing to pay for intimacy and why women generally don't have to.


(Edit to add: I've pretty much always been a sarcastic asshole online, but I'm a pretty decent guy in person. Online, I can say what I want without worrying (or caring) about what someone thinks. In person, I would never intentionally say something to offend someone. ..... Well .... never say "never," I guess.)

Fair enough.

In my situation, my wife has been disfigured and disabled by cancer and is unable to perform. She has no breasts and a number of other physical issues. She would not be happy knowing I'm "cheating," in spite of the fact that she knows she can't do the job.

(Fuck Cancer)

There is no way I'm going to be "that guy" who divorces a seriously ill wife. So, it's either become a hobbyist or become celibate. Which one would you choose?

That said, it is for more common for men to dissociate "sex" from "love" and cheat on his wife/SO while still loving his wife/SO and not wanting to leave her. Women are far more likely to associate "sex" and "love" as being intertwined. That's why there are approximately 3 million men on Ashley Madison for every 1 legitimate (not a bot) woman. Its also why men are willing to pay for intimacy and why women generally don't have to.


(Edit to add: I've pretty much always been a sarcastic asshole online, but I'm a pretty decent guy in person. Online, I can say what I want without worrying (or caring) about what someone thinks. In person, I would never intentionally say something to offend someone. ..... Well .... never say "never," I guess.) Originally Posted by SmallWonder

No worries, every one has those times where we come across differently than we intended.
Agreed, fuck cancer.
Nice of you to stand by your woman BTW

when doing said wife she says to you right when you nutt
,, Think I'll paint the walls blue

Just to tack on to what I said earlier, studies show that a significant number of Americans cheat on their spouse. Without looking up the exact percentages, it seems like its about 1/3 of both males and females, with males slightly outnumbering the females.

It seems to me that if you take reasonable precautions a person is much less likely to be caught visiting a paid provider than having a relationship with another woman in another situation. With a paid provider, there is no emotional attachment (ideally), nobody placing demands on your time or affections, no hidden love notes, no texts and email messages to explain. There is nobody there insisting that you leave your wife or pressuring you to spend more time with them.

In my case, I don't live in Wichita, but I do come to town to work ... typically 6 to 8 days a month. During that time, I don't have to account for my time or money. My changes of getting caught by my wife are pretty small.

Anyone getting involved in the hobby should take precautions if they wish to not get caught. Payment should be cash or no-name gift cards/debit cards. Never give a provider your real name. Never give a provider the name of your employer or where you live. I would suggest to even make up a line of employment. Use a "burner" phone so the phone calls can't be traced back to you. Don't let a provider see your license plate number. If you want to be really careful, don't let them see your car. When going to an appointment, always look around at the environment. Only visit reliable, reviewed providers.

Now, having said that, I don't do all of these things every time. But I'm pretty careful. This is not to say that I will never get caught. But I think my odds of being caught are less than the odds I'd be found it if I were carrying on an emotional/sexual affair with a co-worker or if I were boinking the MILF next door.

If you are a single guy seeing providers, you don't necessarily have to take all of these precautions, but it wouldn't hurt keeping yourself as anonymous as possible. If a provider gets busted, one of the things she's going to be pressured to do is give up names of clients. Make sure you don't get put on a list.

the chances of being busted cheating are regardless as to it being with a call girl. so the point of getting skinned alive and chastised in court and hated by your children are moot! if you are caught cheating are you going to pony up the info that the girl your cheating on your wife with is a prostitute I think not?

getting caught and divorce and children being upset that you cheated on their mother is a given regardless who the woman is! but losing your job due to cheating is taking it a little extreme. people cheat on their wives and get caught every day in this world.

is it frowned upon by many yes but some of the points you make hg are some over the rainbow circumstances! and not likely to happen.