What is Most Important In A Good Sex Life?

Kelly TNT's Avatar
Which Of The Following Is Most Important In A Good Sex Life?
  • How Much Sex I'm getting
  • Quality of the sex for all
  • Orgasms...it's all about the "O's"!
  • How my partner/s rate my performance
  • Who I get to do it with...
  • How it makes me feel emotionally
  • Level of fulfillment & personal satisfaction
  • The number of my jealous friends!
  • Other...(please add a comment!)
Is it bad if I chose all the above?!?

I don't know about Most Important. Having a Good Sex Life involves so many things. "Others"...Sexual/Sensual Connection, Good Communication, Trust, and If my partner and I click Sexually. (I have had a Bad Sexual Chemistry with someone before. He'd zig, I'd zag. Never could get our rhythm right. He was fast and all over the place. I was intense...yet methodical. It was just really really bad.) So, I believe that some people are just Not made to be lovers. Sucks for those who find that out After getting married! Ooof. I guess the Most important thing would be HAVING IT PERIOD!

~Kelly TNT
Any sex life is a good sex life for me, I am so under loved.

Seriously though, I think that it is the chemistry between you and your partner that makes it good. Having a comfort level, being able to explore each other, try new things and push them to their limits.
I can't honestly relate to any of those, I wish I could. My sex life is relative to the amount of times I commit Mass Genocide of my own DNA in a Week...


Scouts Honor....
selot's Avatar
  • selot
  • 02-10-2010, 12:33 AM
For Me, Sex is much more about Quality than Quantity... I feel like there has to be some emotional attachment to the person that you are having sex with for really great sex.

Not sure I want my partner/s rating my sexual performance.

Who I am having sex with is VERY important to me. I guess I am picky when it comes to my sexual partners.

Emotions/Fulfillment/Personal Satisfaction - If the right person and the quality of the sex is good then all of those things will be there as well.

There is a part of me down deep inside that likes to know my friends are jealous of my sexual escapades.



Which Of The Following Is Most Important In A Good Sex Life?
  • How Much Sex I'm getting
  • Quality of the sex for all
  • Orgasms...it's all about the "O's"!
  • How my partner/s rate my performance
  • Who I get to do it with...
  • How it makes me feel emotionally
  • Level of fulfillment & personal satisfaction
  • The number of my jealous friends!
  • Other...(please add a comment!)
Is it bad if I chose all the above?!?

I don't know about Most Important. Having a Good Sex Life involves so many things. "Others"...Sexual/Sensual Connection, Good Communication, Trust, and If my partner and I click Sexually. (I have had a Bad Sexual Chemistry with someone before. He'd zig, I'd zag. Never could get our rhythm right. He was fast and all over the place. I was intense...yet methodical. It was just really really bad.) So, I believe that some people are just Not made to be lovers. Sucks for those who find that out After getting married! Ooof. I guess the Most important thing would be HAVING IT PERIOD!

~Kelly TNT
Originally Posted by Kelly TNT
Kelly, I have to write that for me, what is most important is both communication and chemistry. If you are a match to the one you are intimate with and you both communicate then the world is your oyster since the O’s will be there, the fun will be there and there would be no end to it. Like Selot, who I am with is the most important factor to me because I am very. very selective about whom I am with.

I don’t consider what friends mean in a situation like that nor do I consider if I get to do it with multiple people since I took your question to be one that transcends the P4P realm which means I prefer just one and not a crowd. I will write that to me what is also important is the quality of the sex rather than the quantity. I think one does not have to be screwing their brains out all the time to have good, fulfilling sex. Most women love it when their guys make love to their minds first then get physical with them later. At least that is what I have been told by a fair amount of ladies who are not in the P4P world. From my perspective, I love making out and playing with the one I am with. Play, not necessarily role play but just playful play, is a real turn on which then usually leads to other more heavy breathing.

As far as those who discover that they are not a match sexually to their mate after marriage… yes, that is not good at all.
Well it is not how much that is important. It is the quality and chemistry. Who it is with is key, and the level of intimacy and trust to let each other see your animal side.
Having said that,and having been in a relationship where we only had sex once a week(not by our choice) and it was the best sexual relationship i have ever had, i would love to have quality sex 3-4 times a week with the right person. But i have given up on finding that one special person and "true love", so lets have fun and lots of hot uninhibited sex!
scooterpie's Avatar
What is most important? The thing that is most important and the most difficult is finding a willing partner...I am also so underloved.
PoppyToyota's Avatar
What is most important? The thing that is most important and the most difficult is finding a willing partner...I am also so underloved. Originally Posted by scooterpie
+ 1
Kelly, first three on your list are the most important....Quality, Quantity and Orgasms....If you have the right partner, all three will be achieved....
Will Boner's Avatar
Simple...........that she enjoys it as much as I do, and shows/expresses it.
I go for quality, emotional connection and O my god! There are orgasms and then there are orgasms that make a supernova look like a sparkler on the Fourth of July! That + who I get to do it with = Level of fulfillment & personal satisfaction.
travelling_man's Avatar
What makes a good sex life? Being able to fuck other women. It would be so great if my SO encouraged that....but alas......

I look at it this way - supposed you have a favorite dessert (chocolate pie for arguments sake). You had to eat chocolate pie every single day for the rest of your life. I don't care how damn good that chocolate pie was or how you tried to spice it up (whipped cream on top), after a while you'll get tired of it. Now suppose you see a hot steaming slice of apple pie with ice cream on top. That apple pie is going to taste pretty good. Now have that apple pie for a few weeks and do without the chocolate pie. The next time you come back to that chocolate pie it tastes pretty good too.

So that's my thought on a good sex life - variety.

So that's my thought on a good sex life - variety. Originally Posted by travelling_man
They do say that variety is the spice of life. I agree completely!
sandman227ahb's Avatar
I agree with Hugh: I think most men consider "good" or "great" sex is defined by how much the woman enjoys it, and expresses that enjoyment. If she's wild, vocal, orgasmic, etc..

I mean, think about some of the comments you see in negative reviews: "she just laid there", "way too quiet", "unresponsive", "unenthusiastic", and so on...
1thatgotaway's Avatar
I don't think it's bad to choose all of them. I think for me the list would be..
  • Open communication
  • Trust
  • Chemistry
  • Emotional connection/satisfaction
  • Sexual openness

I think each of the elements on your list are brought about by one or more of these. I think the meaningfulness of "Who it is" is a function of these qualities, and the 5 together make for great orgasms and a satisfied partner. A satisfied partner is the achievement of quality, and quality promotes the desire for quantity.

I think trust and sexual openness are very important. She needs to know that I am willing to try anything, that I am not afraid of any fantasy she may have, that she will not need to fear judgment. It is along that path we will find the "good stuff".


Ok.. I don't have a spot on my list for jealous friends but I see how that would be pretty cool!