Public Perspective

What is to be consider acceptable behavior when you see a provider (who you may or not have dated) in a public setting? I would like to know what both sides of the aisle think.
J

A wink & a nod...

I only say hello if the other person is alone. Makes no difference if I'm alone or not, say hi anytime! I've ran into Dallas around, since we live on the same side of town.

I would say unless contact is initiated by the hobbyist, a provider should not, in any manner, acknowledge the presence of the hobbyist. No, not even a wink or nod. There is just no way a provider can know if my SO, my boss, my mom, sister, neighbor or any number of other people are in the room and could cause an issue. Maybe my SO went to the ladies room and is on her way back when you wink. Trust me, if she is within 100 yards, she will pick up on it.

If the hobbyist initiates contact then sure, say hi and follow his lead.

Yep thats true..silence is best unless you know their situation

I agree!

+1 Agree wholeheartedly.

I had an ATF higher end provider (ranked among top 100 on TER) that I frequented back when. Amazing provider, GFE, DDF, BBBJWCIM Swallow, MSOG, anything goes, always fresh, high end hotels, bleached privates, porn star body, great conversation, and I compensated her well. One day out of the blue, I received a text "Hi Baby, I'm available" that appeared on my phone's lock screen when I was away from my phone...since she was my regular I trusted her and used my real #. Luckily, no one saw it. I texted her back and told her to never contact me again and blocked her number.

I can only speak for myself but do not ever under any circumstance initiate first contact or any contact with a client and by client I mean me. To me the most important rule of this game is "discretion". Believe it or not, some of us have reputations to protect and do not have the degree of freedom that are privileged to providers.

I would say unless contact is initiated by the hobbyist, a provider should not, in any manner, acknowledge the presence of the hobbyist. No, not even a wink or nod. There is just no way a provider can know if my SO, my boss, my mom, sister, neighbor or any number of other people are in the room and could cause an issue. Maybe my SO went to the ladies room and is on her way back when you wink. Trust me, if she is within 100 yards, she will pick up on it.

If the hobbyist initiates contact then sure, say hi and follow his lead. Originally Posted by slinmo

+1 Agree wholeheartedly.

I had an ATF higher end provider (ranked among top 100 on TER) that I frequented back when. Amazing provider, GFE, DDF, BBBJWCIM Swallow, MSOG, anything goes, always fresh, high end hotels, bleached privates, porn star body, great conversation, and I compensated her well. One day out of the blue, I received a text "Hi Baby, I'm available" that appeared on my phone's lock screen when I was away from my phone...since she was my regular I trusted her and used my real #. Luckily, no one saw it. I texted her back and told her to never contact me again and blocked her number.

I can only speak for myself but do not ever under any circumstance initiate first contact or any contact with a client and by client I mean me. To me the most important rule of this game is "discretion". Believe it or not, some of us have reputations to protect and do not have the degree of freedom that are privileged to providers. Originally Posted by dirty1234

I don't know about your statement "degree of freedom that is privileged to providers". I don't believe it has anything to do with a "freedom". That we have, as I believe most providers have other lives...at least I know I do, such as a businesss aside from this. However, I may be the exception, I don't have a clue,and it isn't important. I DO 100% agree with you about no contact, not even acknowledging when I see someone out in public, but I also believe this should work both ways. I wouldn't dream of even looking twice at someone I've met through being a provider, much less speak to them.
And I expect the same courtesy. I tell my "clients" you never have to worry, I will never call or text you, or even email you. I've heard of providers that do, perhaps to let the gentleman know she's running a special or something. Firstly, I never run specials, as I believe a professional service is invaluable, and I believe we are paid to "go away"... meaning no contact once our session is finished. Discretion is my number one priority, for both parties involved.
I was at a public function with some family members, when I heard someone yell across the room.."KATEE", then he started walking towards us, no one knew he was headed for me, except me, I immediately excused myself for the restroom, and when I came out he was gone. He called me the following day and I diplomatically explained that his actions were not acceptable. He wouldn't want me to do that to him, and while I may be paid for my time, I wasn't on the clock, and demand to be treated with the same respect that I give him. I've never heard from him since, and that's fine with me.
One never knows another's situation,therefore acting with discretion at all times is not only respectful, but mandatory, in my opinion. I "get it". That many gentlemen say " call me when your available" or something of the sort.... NO... you call me when you'd like an appointment, and we will see if I am available.
Just my method of business, and my humble opinion.

I should have appropriately added "degree of freedom that is privileged to some providers". Definitely agree that there are large variances when it comes to discretion in terms of preference in relation to clients and providers...some don't care and some are highly private. After my experience, I've never given out my personal number and the "hobby" phone remains off when I'm not hobbying.

I like your style and your professionalism. Good post and great points on paid to "go away" and contact etiquette.
Believe it or not, some of us hobbyist are actually handsome, charming, successful, well educated, etc...and can get the prized "kitty" whenever we want but we choose the "pay to play" for our own personal reasons.

Katee, I've seen your ads before but was always hesitant about pulling the trigger (forgive my candid) due to the age. I've only known/seen a handful of white women past 40 that facially, appears truly dashing.

I don't know about your statement "degree of freedom that is privileged to providers". I don't believe it has anything to do with a "freedom". That we have, as I believe most providers have other lives...at least I know I do, such as a businesss aside from this. However, I may be the exception, I don't have a clue,and it isn't important. I DO 100% agree with you about no contact, not even acknowledging when I see someone out in public, but I also believe this should work both ways. I wouldn't dream of even looking twice at someone I've met through being a provider, much less speak to them.
And I expect the same courtesy. I tell my "clients" you never have to worry, I will never call or text you, or even email you. I've heard of providers that do, perhaps to let the gentleman know she's running a special or something. Firstly, I never run specials, as I believe a professional service is invaluable, and I believe we are paid to "go away"... meaning no contact once our session is finished. Discretion is my number one priority, for both parties involved.
I was at a public function with some family members, when I heard someone yell across the room.."KATEE", then he started walking towards us, no one knew he was headed for me, except me, I immediately excused myself for the restroom, and when I came out he was gone. He called me the following day and I diplomatically explained that his actions were not acceptable. He wouldn't want me to do that to him, and while I may be paid for my time, I wasn't on the clock, and demand to be treated with the same respect that I give him. I've never heard from him since, and that's fine with me.
One never knows another's situation,therefore acting with discretion at all times is not only respectful, but mandatory, in my opinion. I "get it". That many gentlemen say " call me when your available" or something of the sort.... NO... you call me when you'd like an appointment, and we will see if I am available.
Just my method of business, and my humble opinion. Originally Posted by katee

I also believe this should work both ways. Discretion is my number one priority, for both parties involved. Originally Posted by katee

Absolutely correct.

When i lived in New Orleans,I had a gent I saw once a month...and also my SO & I would socialize with him and his wife at swinger's events..............we never "swung" with them though,but she knew who i was.

Well one mardi Gra I saw him in the morning before the parades started......so that afternoon at the parade,I looked over & he happened to be standing a couple people down from me! So I,not thinking or looking closely.went up to him & gave him a big hug...then I looked over and his wife was standing next to him! She just smiled at me and turned to watch the parade..........welll from now on,I just smile or wink or if I know their situation,ignore!

LOL

I meet a lot of people on the street every day, young, old , men and women.
If they make eye contact, i will smile and say hi.
If you don't want me to sat hi, don't make eye contact.

I like your style and your professionalism. Good post and great points on paid to "go away" and contact etiquette.
Believe it or not, some of us hobbyist are actually handsome, charming, successful, well educated, etc...and can get the prized "kitty" whenever we want but we choose the "pay to play" for our own personal reasons.

Katee, I've seen your ads before but was always hesitant about pulling the trigger (forgive my candid) due to the age. I've only known/seen a handful of white women past 40 that facially, appears truly dashing.[/QUOTE]

I do believe it, as most of the gentlemen that I see are just that. Gentlemen. Handsome, intelligent, successful, who need their companion to be highly discreet.

As for my age, I respect the fact that many prefer younger ladies, and that doesn't offend me at all. I'm quite comfortable with my age, and certainly am more than just okay with being over 40 and "truly dashing" as you say. I don't believe I'm overly confident, or cocky, however, I do feel blessed in that I have good genes, and believe I'm quite attractive, even for my age. With that being said .... Part of why this works for many is that one has so many choices, and can readily find what most appeals to them, and their personal preferences.

Happy holidays.

A discrete wink and a nod from me.

I have been asked this since meeting with a couple of people who are close by. It is a NO NO for either of us to acknowledge each other unless we are BCD. Period. No harm done for either of us.