Pussy VS Beer

It is time to do a comparison between two things treasured by men, beer and pussy...

A beer is always wet.
A pussy needs encouragement.
Advantage: Beer.

A beer tastes horrible served hot.
A pussy tastes better served hot.
Advantage: Pussy.

Having an ice cold beer makes you satisfied.
Having an ice cold pussy makes you Hillary Clinton.
Advantage: Beer.

Beers have commercials making fun of skunky ones.
Pussy does not.
advantage: Tie

If you get a hair in your teeth
consuming pussy, you are not disgusted.
Advantage: Pussy

24 beers come in a box.
A pussy is a box you can come in.
Advantage: Pussy

Too much head makes you mad at the
person giving you a beer.
Advantage: Pussy.

If a beer is brewed with yeast, it is
still edible.
Advantage: Beer.

If you come home smelling like beer,
your wife may get mad. If you come home
smelling like pussy, she will definitely get mad.
Advantage: Beer.

6 beers in a night and you better not
drive. 6 pussies in a night and you
have done all the driving you need.
Advantage: Pussy

Buy too much beer and you will get fat.
Buy too much pussy and you will get poor.
Advantage: Tie

It is socially acceptable to have a beer in the stands at a football game.
You are a legend if you have a pussy in the stands at a football game.
Advantage: Pussy

If a cop smells beer on your breath,
you are going to get a breathalyzer.
If a cop smells pussy on your breath,
you are going to get a high five.
Advantage: Pussy

With beer, bigger is better.
Advantage: beer.

Wearing a condom does not make a beer
any less enjoyable.
Advantage: beer.

Pussy can make you see God. Beer can
make you see the porcelain god.
Advantage: Pussy

If you think all day about the next pussy
you will have, you are normal.
If you think all day about your next beer,
you are an alcoholic.
Advantage: Pussy

Peeling labels off of beers is fun.
Peeling panties off of pussy is more fun.
Advantage: Pussy.

If you try to snag a beer at work,
you get fired. If you try to snag a pussy
at work, you get hit with sexual harassment.
Advantage: Tie

If you suddenly drop a beer, it may
break. If you suddenly drop a pussy,
it may hunt you down like the dog you are.
Advantage: Beer.

If you change to another beer, your
old brand will gladly have you back.
Advantage: Beer.

The best pussy you have ever had is
not gone once you have enjoyed it.
Advantage: Pussy.

The worst pussy you have ever had is
not gone once you have enjoyed it.
Advantage: Beer.

Bad beer: Schlitz, PBR, Old Swill.
Bad pussy: Roseanne, Janet Reno, Madeline Albright.
Advantage: Tie

Good beer: Samuel Adams, Moosehead,
Pete's Wicked Winter Brew.
Good pussy: Almost all but the above.
Advantage Pussy.

The government taxes beer.
Advantage: Pussy.

And there, my friends is the reason I consume Pinot Grigio. Proven again it goes best with pussy! Ever wonder what to do with all those corks?

Ever wonder what to do with all those corks? Originally Posted by arklookn4lovn

I always wondered, but was afraid to ask... thanks!

Huck

Do you get a tear in your eye when she uses the corkscrew?

Beer will never open itself and peel off its own label.
Advantage: Pussy

Beer must be brewed and bottled my someone else before you get a hold of it.
Advantage: Virgin Pussy

Not too many guys will pick up your beer and drink it if you leave it too long.
Advantage: Pussy

LOL Git!!!........................ .....You can't eat a beer ..advantage..Pussy
.............................. .............You can only suck a beer at one spot ..advantage ..Pussy .............................. ..............A beer doesn't look any better with its labels off ...advantage ..Pussy

Beer always smells bad. Pussy [almost always] smells good.
Advantage, Pussy.

Hey guys, I think we need a separate thread on Dick Vs. Chocolate.

. . . Hey guys, I think we need a separate thread on Dick Vs. Chocolate. Originally Posted by Ginger Doll

I never met a piece of chocolate I didn't like.
It ain't my week for Dick. Next week ain't lookin' good either!
DEFINITE ADVANTAGE: CHOCOLATE!!!

I never met a piece of chocolate I didn't like.
It ain't my week for Dick. Next week ain't lookin' good either!
DEFINITE ADVANTAGE: CHOCOLATE!!! Originally Posted by arklookn4lovn

I was actually gearing that question towards the ladies...

But thanks for chiming in and clarifying, BB. At least we know what you're NOT doing with those corks!

Beer always smells bad. Pussy [almost always] smells good.
Advantage, Pussy.

Hey guys, I think we need a separate thread on Dick Vs. Chocolate. Originally Posted by Ginger Doll

since I don't eat chocolate , guess I will stick with Dick lol