Here you go Burk. A little Christmas Humor

I know Burk was complaining about the lack of interaction and humor on the boards a while back. So here's a potentially feeble attempt at a little holiday humor for you.

I went into a Kohl's store the other day and picked out some items to buy. The total price ended up being $62 and change. And as they always do, the cashier turned to me and said "You saved $37.12 today sir." And as I usually do, I said "I didn't save anything. I spent 62 bucks."

I hate it when they do that. Their stuff never costs the originally marked full price, so their proclamation of my huge savings amount is totally bogus. Usually the cashier doesn't argue with me and gets me the hell out of there as fast as she can. But not this one. She firmly believed in my savings of $37.12 and was bound and determined to prove it to me. She starts going down the receipt line by line and says "You see sir, this was originally priced at whatever and you ended up buying it for much less, so you ended up saving a gallizion dollars." And I'm not having it at all. "No I didn't," I reply. "I spent $62. If all this stuff actually cost a hundred bucks, I wouldn't have bought it. I'm not saving anything here, I am spending 62 bucks."

We went back and forth like this for a while, much to the chagrin of the customers in line behind me. Their moans finally became loud enough that they attracted the attention of a store manager who happened to be passing by. "Is there a problem here sir?" The exasperated cashier began to tell her how I would not believe in my savings amount and how she was trying her best to prove my true savings to me. The manager glances at the receipt and tells me that it says I saved $37.12. To which I reply that I didn't save anything. I spent 62 bucks. As the cashier began her savings explanation again, the manager gives her a "are you fucking kidding me" look. She snatches the receipt away from the cashier, gives me a "get the fuck out of here" look, holds the receipt out toward me and says "Here's your receipt sir. Have a nice day."

No wonder she gets the big bucks. I left to be on my way. And to continue spreading holiday cheer wherever I go.

I love it! I have done that also... I bet they get that all the time. The poor clerks must hate to say it.

I'm glad I'm not in line behind you guys when I'm shopping. That cashier would drive me crazy!

They should have said. " Here sir it says you saved 32 dollars over a price that nobody has ever paid. The price you just paid at the huge non existent savings is a 300 percent markup. We are glad people are so stupid they think they are getting a deal. Here's some free lube on the house as your ass will soon start to hurt like heck. Have a nice day and Merry Xmas." lol

I have a good one too. I was in need of some Pedro Ximenez sherry for a party. I called a local, popular liquor store abbd asked, "Do you have any Pedro Ximenez Sherry?" The girl who answered the phone responded with, "ummm I'm not sure if there is anyone here by that name, let me check." After I stopped laughing I explained it to her and she had to find the manager.

When I read it this morning it was funny. O it still is! Thnx!

Here is what infuriates, or pisses me off. I do need to keep my blood pressure down though. It has been working on me. LOL We can go into the definition of 'money' some other place/time!

So now we are supposed to get this tax break. Yea that may or may not be.
But the President, the Congress, yes democrats and republicans both, and the media as well. We hear and beautiful Christmas present. Or how we going to pay for it! And on and on etc.! They are SO disingenuous! The people can keep some of their own money! (Some maybe not so much)

Lets understand 1 thing. The 'government' doesn't have any money in the 1st place!! It is ours, yours mine, etc.
Oh! The government is going to shut down Saturday! OH NO! They all get paid anyway!

So we get a Christmas present because we get to keep more of our money? LOL How does that work?

But if I get a tax break I can have more for the hobby!
I won't complain.