Cologne and your short hairs....

LovingKayla's Avatar
We are all aware of our nether regions. We all scratch and sniff to make sure it's pleasant. But the one thing you should never, under any circumstances, do is spray cologne down there. When I say down there, I mean any place below your belly button. Imagine a bag of gently rotting potatos... now place your head in the bag and breath for about 15 min. That's roughly how intense the smell of inexpensive cologne can be when your nose is buried in the stuff. We don't smell the pleasant thing you intend for us, rather a choking, life altering, odor that is all consuming. We literally have to time our breathing when people do this.

If you have the misfortune of funk down there, please don't make it worse by adding an alcohol based inexpensive scent that should be outlawed on principle alone.

In my experience, axe products and soap are the only things you should put where our faces go. If you HAVE to put cologne down there, then try putting it on either side of your legs (but that could be bad too if you end up rubbing her down with your legs so she is now covered in it.... Sorta makes a hoe bath difficult. That stuff doesn't just come off in one try.


I do hope you guys take this as constructive observation (the spirit in which it's given.)



PS Powder is also a no no. Nothing can dry my mouth like some baby powder.
PODarkness's Avatar
Alcohol and my prouder half get along really well, but it's not like you are describing. Alcohol goes on the inside.

Sorta makes a hoe bath difficult. That stuff doesn't just come off in one try.
I've never been big on adding smelly stuff to ... well, anything, so I really don't know the answer to this. Why does the cheap stuff last significantly longer than the (I guess) good stuff?
LovingKayla's Avatar
I honestly have no idea why it last longer, but the sweet nice smell is gone after a very short time and you are left with the alcohol and rancid smell.

This conversation has come up many times with friends and I think the male population has forgotton again, so here's your friendly reminder. I hate doing stuff that I think is great but my friends hate. I don't take hints well, so this was written for people like me (that are oblivious to things around them at least part of the time.)
  • T-Can
  • 06-08-2011, 10:09 AM
I only spray there in the winter after a shower
true_whatever's Avatar
Two showers a day and intense focus on cleaning the area meticulously. Being shaved down there helps too.

The above comments could apply to both men and women. Your partner will appreciate it.

Scented stuff down there is unnecessary in my opinion. The natural smell of a CLEAN nether region is the greatest smell in the world.
BigPurdy's Avatar
Cheap cologne, what's that? Oh yea, Old Spice, LOL.

I love me some AXE for this.
It's like everytime I spritz my perfume in between my cleavage...it always comes back to bite me in the end.
Never fails...while tasting 'him' after some Russian lessons...oh gawd why did I spray it there again!?

...Perfume doesn't taste good either.

BigPurdy's Avatar
IP

Lucky perfume.
Softplace doesn't cheap cologne suck in general. My golden rule is soap and scrub and water and dry thoroughly