Sound like

The NHL is going to be suspending operations as well. Word has leaked that tonight's officials have been ordered to go home barring a miracle.

yer queens ...on ice aints gonna lace ...ups ...their skates?

...welcome ta the mass ...panic world a the neo-marxist media ...brigades

No March madness, NHL, NBA, NASCAR not allowing fans on this weekend in Atlanta, NHRA doing the same.

This just in... The world has been cancelled for the next 6 months.... details at 11.....

Fear and Panic spreading one thousand times faster than the virus....
Bidet sales through the roof....

I've been using a bidet for 8-years. I would.never want to go back to paper. I wish some of the girls would use one.

No toilet paper shortage worries.