Dad Jokes.....

martiniwithonion's Avatar
Anybody got any?
I need some new material.
offshoredrilling's Avatar
Anybody got any?
I need some new material. Originally Posted by martiniwithonion
some in "nothing" But warning its a long thread
JONBALLS's Avatar
in the bathroom mirror?

lotsa material
offshoredrilling's Avatar
I found one mmmm kinda

protester assessed for burning trucks on Lake Ave

in court officer speaks to DA

DA says RPD tells me to drop the case

Guy walk out a free man

BUT as walking out of court busted by MC Sheriff

What cleared him. protesters body cam that RPD broke the password when he was in court

To bad it also had him forgetting to turn off cam as slashing tires on MCS petrol cars
Missburger's Avatar
I found one mmmm kinda

protester assessed for burning trucks on Lake Ave

in court officer speaks to DA

DA says RPD tells me to drop the case

Guy walk out a free man

BUT as walking out of court busted by MC Sheriff

What cleared him. protesters body cam that RPD broke the password when he was in court

To bad it also had him forgetting to turn off cam as slashing tires on MCS petrol cars Originally Posted by offshoredrilling
That’s awful

Here’s one why do I like dating black women

Cause I never have to meet the dads
offshoredrilling's Avatar
That’s awful

Here’s one why do I like dating black women

Cause I never have to meet the dads Originally Posted by Missburger
Awful ????

I think its funny as hell protester buys and wears a body cam

then forgets to turn off when guilty

and I love how LE did it, let him think he's free and bust him again
Missburger's Avatar
Awful ????

I think its funny as hell protester buys and wears a body cam

then forgets to turn off when guilty

and I love how LE did it, let him think he's free and bust him again Originally Posted by offshoredrilling
That’s better English lol


But wait for the arrestof the white boy who is in hiding for killing that man

Spencerport house sold already planning to need money for a defense team one can assume
offshoredrilling's Avatar
Anybody got any?
I need some new material. Originally Posted by martiniwithonion
That's the thing about Dad jokes, there is no new material... besides, nobody gets the jokes anyway!! Except another dad...
martiniwithonion's Avatar
How do you spot the blind man at the beach?


He's the one without an erection!
martiniwithonion's Avatar
Why did the blind man fall down the well?


He couldn't see that well!
Presj22's Avatar
Did you hear about the lady who shaved get legs and wrecked em?
A dad is seen consoling his daughter. She’s crying and sobbing and visibly upset. In a vain attempt to calm her down her dad holds her in his arms.

He tells her “that was donald j trump honey; he’s allowed to touch you and grab any part of your body he wants to.

You can ask moscow mitch and the rest of the republican lawlessness makers if you don’t believe me”.

The explanation makes her sob even harder!












Unfortunately, many on here will find this funny.
offshoredrilling's Avatar
A kid asks his dad "What's the difference between realistically and potentially?"





The father responds with "Go ask your siblings and your mother if they would have sex with a celebrity for a million dollars."
The boy asks his mom "Would you have sex with George Clooney for a million dollars?"
The mother responds " While I am a married woman, that is a lot of money. He is also a very attractive man."
The boy asks his sister "Would you have sex with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?"
"Well of course! " she exclaims.
Finally he asks his brother "Would you have sex with Tom Cruise for a million dollars"
And he hums and haws about it "I dunno man, well... That is a lot of money. Yeah alright I'd do it."
When the boy sees his father again the father asks " Did you figure out the difference between potentially and realistically?"
"Yes father, Potentially were sitting on $3,000,000. Realistically were living with two whores and a fag."
stein's Avatar
  • stein
  • 09-26-2020, 09:57 AM
Sounds more like Joe the groper and Bill the molester