One day a hooker went to file her taxes, and for occupation she put prostitution.
The tax collector explained that prostitution was an illegal occupation.
She said she'd have to go home and think about it and that she'd call him back in a hour with her occupation.
An hour later she called him and said, "I've got it... I'm a chicken farmer."
He said, "How do you get chicken farmer out of prostitution."
She said, "I raised over a thousand cocks last year."
- wildcat4fun
- 10-18-2011, 07:18 PM
- leehf321
- 10-18-2011, 08:55 PM
The Madam opened the brothel door in New Orleans and saw a rather dignified, well-dressed, good-looking man in his late forties or early fifties.
—”May I help you sir”’ she asked.
—”I want to see Valerie, please,” the man replied.
—”Sir, Valerie is one of our most expensive ladies. Perhaps you would prefer someone else”, said the Madam.
—”No, Ma’am, I must see Valerie,” he replied with determination.
Just then, Valerie appeared and announced to the man. She charged $5,000 a visit. Without hesitation, the man pulled out five thousand dollars from his wallet and gave them to Valerie, and they went upstairs. After an hour, the man left calmly.
The next evening, the well-dressed man appeared again, once more demanding to see Valerie. Valerie explained that no one had ever come back two nights in a row, as she was too expensive. There were no discounts. The price was still $5,000.
Again, the man pulled out the money, gave it to Valerie, and they went upstairs. After an hour, he left.
The following night the man was there yet again. Everyone was astounded that he had come for a third consecutive night, but he paid Valerie and they went upstairs.
After their session, Valerie said to the distinguished customer, “No one has ever been with me three nights in a row. Where are you from?”
—The man replied, “Wichita, Kansas”.
—”Really”, she said. “I have family in Wichita.”
—”I know.” the man said. “Your sister died, and I am her attorney. She asked me to give you your $15,000 inheritance.”
The moral of the story is that three things in life are certain:
—”May I help you sir”’ she asked.
—”I want to see Valerie, please,” the man replied.
—”Sir, Valerie is one of our most expensive ladies. Perhaps you would prefer someone else”, said the Madam.
—”No, Ma’am, I must see Valerie,” he replied with determination.
Just then, Valerie appeared and announced to the man. She charged $5,000 a visit. Without hesitation, the man pulled out five thousand dollars from his wallet and gave them to Valerie, and they went upstairs. After an hour, the man left calmly.
The next evening, the well-dressed man appeared again, once more demanding to see Valerie. Valerie explained that no one had ever come back two nights in a row, as she was too expensive. There were no discounts. The price was still $5,000.
Again, the man pulled out the money, gave it to Valerie, and they went upstairs. After an hour, he left.
The following night the man was there yet again. Everyone was astounded that he had come for a third consecutive night, but he paid Valerie and they went upstairs.
After their session, Valerie said to the distinguished customer, “No one has ever been with me three nights in a row. Where are you from?”
—The man replied, “Wichita, Kansas”.
—”Really”, she said. “I have family in Wichita.”
—”I know.” the man said. “Your sister died, and I am her attorney. She asked me to give you your $15,000 inheritance.”
The moral of the story is that three things in life are certain:
- Death
- Taxes
- Being screwed by a lawyer
- wildcat4fun
- 10-18-2011, 09:51 PM
LOL.....Now that is very true.