Question for all

I was wondering if you set up an appt with someone thinking you were gonna go thru with it but when you get there a bad vibe comes over you or you see something out of the ordinary would you still go thru with the appt and second guess your gut or would you back out?

If I pulled up and the lady was sitting on the hood of a black & white eating a doughnut I would definitely think twice...

Jen,
That would depend on a lot of details like what it was that seemed off (eg. just an eerie feeling or is there a pile of white powder and cash on the coffee table etc.), is it my first time with a new person or is it an established friend, will what I am seeing/feeling be such a distraction that I won't enjoy the date yada yada yada...

In general, I am a person of logic who believes that most decisions should be made based on logic. Therefore, I may make my decisions based 90% on logic and 10% on "gut". As such it would take a pretty powerful gut feeling to overcome whatever decision I have already made based on the logic. If I have done my research and made my decision to see someone based on solid reasoning, it would usually require a tangible reason for me to back out as well. I expect an occasional unusual vibe with a new person because, well, it is a new person. Like I said though, and like Roscoe's example above, if there is a good tangible reason to cancel, I would cancel. The only reason I might cancel based on a bad vibe was if it was so overpowering that I knew that neither of us would enjoy the date. I do have an example of having to do that once, but the bad vibe had nothing to do with the lady, but was all me. I was having an extended date once while my wife was away and I developed an overwhelming feeling that my wife was going to surprise me by coming home early. I had no logical reason to think that (although the thinking was logic based in regards to weighing how much damage would be done if she did pop in early), but I couldn't get it out of my mind. I just couldn't relax and decided to end the date. That would be an example of gut taking over the decision for me based on my own bad vibe.

Yes, I'd bail out and have done so on more than one occassion. Generally, I'll give the lady $20 for the inconvenience, unless it's a blatant bait and switch.

If a girl decides to bail on a client, I think she owes a complete refund.

Too many details drive that decision. In general, nervousness and second guessing seems to come with meeting someone the first time, at least until that wears down and it becomes automatic.

You get nervous and you jump anyway trusting in your prior preparation.

Last night I had an appt the person contacted me last minute and it was almost 1 am and when he was pulling into my location a horrible feeling came over me.Im the kind of person that never second guesses my gut because I believe it will never steer me wrong and I didnt go thru with the appt. anythings liable to happen that late at night and my safety is to important for me to second guess my gut and end up regretting it in the end.Just like guys have the big head and little head we have our gut intuition

Jen - I believe it always pays to go with your "gut". It would probably be wise not to schedule last minute appointments with someone that you couldn't screen properly. Better safe than sorry. Be careful & play safe!

Always go with your intuition Jen. I think you were right to play it safe. There are so many fucked up individuals out there, you just never know what may happen. 1 AM? That's probably not the best time to meet a new client.

You gals really are at risk and I think every time something seems wrong, you should take the safer choice.


Anyway....That's my .02.

your right Perryay the only time I take late appts like that is if its with someone ive seen before because there are nuts in this world and you never know what can happen at those hours

You made the right choice, trust your instincts!

I like this thread.

When I was more active in the bar game. It always bothered me some would go to the notel hotel. Before checking each other out over a drink.

Yea OSD I figured It would be a good topic and wanted to hear how everyone else felt about this kind of situation

I'm a larger person than you and when I think my safety is at risk, I avoid the situation. Smart move Jen.

Yea safety and discretion are my top priorities and thanks NB

So what did your gut feeling tell you?

1am appt........thats pretty late. So you canceled when he pulled up to your location. Did he look weird, sound weird, hell I tip my hat off to you for taking appts that late. usually I am sleep.

Safety first....always