Hello from a significant other.....the wife here and....

TheSignificantOther's Avatar
I've been perusing this site for a few weeks, reading threads, educating myself, even attempting to remember the lingo.

I'm a thirty three year old woman, married to a wonderful man for over a decade. We have a great relationship, quite honest with one another, deeply in love. We're more honest with one another than most couples could dream of. We don't suffer jealousy. We're good looking, too. We're not supermodels, but we're pleasant to the eye. We own a small business, and are by no means rich. We live frugaly, and work too much.

In our early years, when life was a bit simplier, my husband and I had some good times. We've had a few threesomes, most being light play, though a few times much more. I can't say I'm bi-sexual, because I'm really not, but I'm not opposed to some fun with a woman (and my husband). I've done the deed before, and our threesomes were great. A very erotic time for my husband and I.

So here's the thing-we really want to have another threesome. Of course my husband is excited at the notion (duh), but I'd like one too. I'm nervous, but that nervousness is exactly what I'm looking for.

The problem: it's hard for us to meet women. We're a traditional couple, we don't drink much, we hardly go out, we rarely frequent bars. This, of course, limits our options. Most our interaction with women is professional, and most gals my age are married, etc. We're not partiers, we're not swingers, we aren't looking for a girlfriend.....but we are looking for a good time. An erotic experience. Now that we're older, we look back at the threesomes we have had, and wish to have another. Our sex life is great, but we could both use something different, something new.

Six months ago, we went to a strip club. It was fully nude, and my first experience. We had a blast! I got tipsy, and a dozen lap dances. We met some fun women, and I 'fell in love' with a gal named Fancy (as did my husband). The idea was posed that night. Why not seek a provider?

So, I'm here. My husband pointed me to this site (he's never seen a provider), and so I've spent the past month reading and learning. I will continue to do so before we contact anyone.

The plan: in the next month or two, we'd like to see a provider (female). We're thinking a hotel in Frisco/Plano area. Something nice. We'd like her to come over, maybe a drink or two because I'll be nervous, and .... well, you know.

The reason I'm posting this: I could use some advice. I've read countless threads, and I'll read many more so I understand better, but I'd love to hear from anyone willing to point me in the right direction.

My concerns:
1. No drama. I don't want to be scammed, robbed, put in an awkard situation....none of the above please. We're nervous about this, so a professional would be nice. Obviously, we'll do our research.

2. Cleanliness. Kinda paranoid about this one. What wife wouldn't be?

3. Cost. A woman should get her worth, and we only desire a fair price. Thing is, I can read a provider's site and see a one price (say, 300 an hour), then read a review where it states something lower (say 200 an hour). Why is this? Is price negotiable? If so, how do I go about it without offending anyone? I'd never want to do that.

4. Privacy. What screening process is used (I've read about P411, etc), and more importantly, how safe is it for me? My professional reputation makes me a little concerned about screening. Is my personal information safe? I do understand the need for screening, as I'd want a provider to feel safe.

5. Being a woman, a quickie just isn't in the cards. A woman who doesn't watch the clock would be nice. A reasonable amount of time is what we're looking for, without setting us back a fortune.

5. A good time. I'm a woman, it's differnt for women. I'm looking for someone I can connect with, both physically (I prefer slender girls, but some curvy is ok), and in personality. Obviously, a threesome is a big deal to my husband and I, and the right girl is VERY important to me. My husband, being a man, will have less trouble with this, but I want someone who makes me feel at ease. Someone fun, not fake. I want a provider who will understand we're newbies, who won't make me feel embarrassed, or awkward. Most of all, I want this to be a great, positive and erotic experience.


So, there's my story....a bit long winded, I know, but if there's anyone out there who can offer me tips, point me in the right direction, ease my concerns, or suggest someone, I'd love to hear from you.

Thank you!
One suggestion for you:

Leave your hubby and Marry Me????

Lucky guy, your hubby I mean.


You say you're not rich, and live frugally, so I'm wondering why spring for a hotel? Why not meet at the lady's incall? That would save you some money.

trynagetlaid's Avatar
You and your husband need to study the showcases and reviews and find someone you would feel comfortable with, and who is also newbie friendly. Then go have some fun!!!
Iaintliein's Avatar
Research is the key, measure twice, cut once. HoneyR makes a good point provided the lady has a clean secure incall. You might also consider getting a private massage from one of the ladies who is also an RMT, even if she isn't a candidate for the threesome, just for some private conversation and pointers.
As soon as I'm off my phone I'll give some great pointers for you! I've done this with couples several times and you are going about itgreat!
Ok. I'm so excited for you two to do this together!!! (I'm a dork, I already know)

I'm taking myself out of the running - because I don't really fit the "slender" frame.

So here's how I would address your concerns:

Before we get to your numbered concerns, I have a suggestion. When deciding on the lady, kind of have a consensus on the "rules" of what is "ok" and what is "off limits" as far as what you will do, or not do - what she can do and not do - as well as your husband. (that will prevent a LOT of turmoil for the two of you later on, as well as prevent awkward moments in session). *whenever a husband contacts me first about this type of session, I usually ask him to have the SO contact me to clarify these points BEFORE the session. I don't want to step on any toes.

I am venturing to guess that you would be comfortable with a lady going down on you - especially while your husband watched (maybe while you were taking care of him) but you wouldn't want to reciprocate with the lady. (see? simple issue already laid out in advance!)

#1- No drama. You are already in the right place. Since you are a married couple, I would suggest a girl at least over the age of 25 (no offense younger gals) - just to handle the situation in a bit more "real" manner. I don't know all the girls on the board these days - but maybe even a girl that's been around a couple/few years and has a really solid reputation.

#2- Cleanliness - when you're dealing with the age range I just mentioned, and usually the price range I mention in #3 (and you do your research), there's little to worry about here. When you discuss the situation with the ladies, make it clear that it is a concern...and typically, we all like to please our clients. We'll go above and beyond for the ladies especially to make sure we counter any possible worries.

#3- Cost. Rates on sites vs rates reviewed change based on specials as well as how we adjust our schedules and our availability. What I would do is when you contact the girls you are interested in, refer them to this thread so they understand your position. I'd let them know your budget (I'd suggest $250 and provide drinks - and if you're working with an established provider - I agree, save the cost of the hotel and go to her incall. The level of girls you're working with are going to have a nice set up.) It's not haggling to let a lady know what your price limits are...I mean, if she has rates posted at a minimum booking of 2 hr @ $600...well, you may want to skip her.

#4- Privacy. This is a good one. Typically, you'd have to go through a mess of various reference checks and job checks...but you two own your own biz. Here's my own suggestion...(from experience). Meet a week ahead of time. You and her. He can stay at work...(his little head will over-ride his big head and probably won't allow him to think straight for a whole week straight and you'll get nothing else done at work!) Tell him you'll handle it - and then you two can discuss whatever you need to discuss - except money. Laugh, joke, have fun - and this will also help calm some of your nerves (and possibly hers...hell, I still get nervous sometimes, and that's probably a good sign) and look forward to the actual date.

#5- Fun. Start interviewing via emails or PM's now. You will get a vibe of who is fake and full of shit pretty quick. Understand that there is a bottom line of this being about money - BUT - that there is a LOT of us that really do enjoy many aspects of our job. (even though there are quite a few shitty things that make us roll our eyes or come on here and bitch and moan) For me, couples are a blast. I love knowing that a couple is so trusting of one another - that they can bring another girl into the mix and tear things up! I believe hiring a provider is probably the safest way to go about it, because there is less potential for emotional damage down the road. You can still easily build an ongoing "provider relationship" between the 3 of you, but the chances of emotions or love or backstabbing coming into play go down significantly - because what I said at the beginning of this one....the bottom line is $.

I sincerely wish you the best of luck and I hope you two have the time of your lives!
What a very lucky couple!! This website is definitely "the place to go" for this type of adventure! Your concerns are 100% appropriate, and with research I am sure that you will find a wonderful girl to play out some fantasies with.

In my experience with couples, I have found that communication (especially beforehand) is key. If you and your spouse have rules, or boundaries, share them with the provider up front. Lots of email flirting & picture swapping (provider, your husband, and you) can make for a nice "tease" leading up to the set appointment. Sharing specific fantasies is a nice touch...this gives us ideas on how to tailor the session to YOUR specific desires....and surprise you with our creativeness to make the experience completely unforgettable for you!

Watching the "clock" should be out the window when it comes to female on female action...he he he...well that's my opinion ....I believe it depends on the chemistry of the couple with the provider, and if she chooses to "entertain" after the alotted time, I guess that's ultimately up to her.
When playing with a couple, it's hard to really keep an eye on the time anyways, there's usually SO MUCH FUN going on!! It's nice to sit and have a drink (or two) beforehand to chit chat, and sort of get friendly and begin to flirt and tease....


I've always had a nice time with couples. Here's one of my erotic couples adventures: http://www.eccie.net/showthread.php?t=307400&highli ght=italiana+princess



I wish you the best of luck, and "Cheers" to many MULTIPLE "O's" for everyone!!

XOXO,
ItalianaPrincess
Warning Warning Danger Danger Danger,

If you choose the Italian Princess you better be ready for a night of passion and raw sex. She might tie up the male half and just make him watch you and the Princess together. Of course if you are truly brave, have the Princess and TNTAngie both join the two of you. That way no one person is left out of any activities. Lucky bastard, he would never be the same after being with three ladies. Hey TNT and Princess, if you need some practice before such an evening, you know where I live!!!!!
Warning Warning Danger Danger Danger,

If you choose the Italian Princess you better be ready for a night of passion and raw sex. She might tie up the male half and just make him watch you and the Princess together. Of course if you are truly brave, have the Princess and TNTAngie both join the two of you. That way no one person is left out of any activities. Lucky bastard, he would never be the same after being with three ladies. Hey TNT and Princess, if you need some practice before such an evening, you know where I live!!!!! Originally Posted by durango95
you mean, if YOU need practice?


we already know what we are doing.

bwah ha ha ha ha.

*by the way, it's not always rough and tumble...some times seductive and sensual works just fine too.
Hey I gave it a shot. No its not always rough and tumble, I know the Princess can be very seductive and very sensual. And you dear Lady, well you can be anything you want. I know this couple would be in for a real special evening with the two of you joining them, just wish I was there to watch.
  • hd
  • 12-06-2011, 10:48 AM
just wish I was there to watch

durango95, that's what cameras are for!
Suggestion: Alyssa Nicole. She's done this but y'all will have to be screened...unless your S.O. has already seen her.

You pretty much described her in your second Point #5.
London Rayne's Avatar
I can second Alyssa Nicole. She is not intimidating and will not demand attention from your man just to feel secure. She is sweet, kind, and beautiful. Just don't do it this Sat. because I am trying to get her butt to New Orleans ha ha.
TheSignificantOther's Avatar
One suggestion for you:

Leave your hubby and Marry Me????

Lucky guy, your hubby I mean. Originally Posted by durango95
Yeah, he is a lucky guy, lol. He's a wonderful husband.