Just a Joke...

A husband walks into the bedroom holding two aspirin and a glass of water. His wife asks, "What's that for?"


"It's for your headache."


"I don't have a headache."




He replies, "Let's fuck"

Then the wife says, "Give me the aspirin".

Good one NAN...so glad I'm not married....

Thanks..I LMAO when I heard it.

Please anyone feel free to add your own...it is the Sandbox.

I like that one, I may have to use it. lmao

A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods.

The bear turns to the rabbit and says " Do you ever have trouble with shit sticking to your fur?"

And the rabbit says " Nope, never have."

So the bear wipes his ass with the rabbit

*Note* never try this with a midget

LMMFAO.....

The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to use a surrogate father to start their family. On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife goodbye and said, 'Well, I'm off now. The man should be here soon.'
Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby photographer happened to ring the doorbell, hoping to make a sale. 'Good morning, Ma'am', he said, 'I've come to...'
'Oh, no need to explain,' Mrs. Smith cut in, embarrassed, 'I've been expecting you.'
'Have you really?' said the photographer. 'Well, that's good. Did you know babies are my specialty?'
'Well that's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have a seat !.
After a moment she asked, blushing, 'Well, where do we start?'
'Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the couch, and perhaps a couple on the bed. And sometimes the living room floor is fun. You can really spread out there.'
'Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work out for Harry and me!'
'Well, Ma'am, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But if we try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven angles, I'm sure you'll be pleased with the results.'
'My, that's a lot!', gasped Mrs. Smith.
'Ma'am, in my line of work a man has to take his time. I'd love to be In and out in five minutes, but I'm sure you'd be disappointed with that.'
'Don't I know it,' said Mrs. Smith quietly.
The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his baby pictures. 'This was done on the top of a bus,' he said.
'Oh, my God!' Mrs. Smith exclaimed, grasping at her throat.
'And these twins turned out exceptionally well - when you consider their mother was so difficult to work with..'
'She was difficult?' asked Mrs. Smith.
'Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her to the park to get the job done right. People were crowding around four and five deep to get a good look'
'Four and five deep?' said Mrs. Smith, her eyes wide with amazement.
'Yes', the photographer replied. 'And for more than three hours, too. The mother was constantly squealing and yelling - I could hardly concentrate, and when darkness approached I had to rush my shots. Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just had to pack it all in.'
Mrs. Smith leaned forward. 'Do you mean they actually chewed on your, uh...equipment?'
'It's true, Ma'am, yes.. Well, if you're ready, I'll set-up my tripod and we can get to work right away..'
'Tripod?'
'Oh yes, Ma'am. I need to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's much too big to be held in the hand very long.'
Mrs. Smith fainted

A hooker, a lawyer and a cop walk into a bar...

oops, maybe the wrong place for this joke.

punchline is everyone got fucked in the end.

Favorite place to cum?

A. In her pussy
B. on her tits
C. In her mouth
D. On her pussy/ belly
E. on her ass/ back
F. In her hand
G. On her feet
H. In her panties
I. On her face
J. In the living room while she sleeps in the bedroom
K. At the office under your desk while people walk by wondering what you are looking at on your computer.
L. Any place you can get away with
M. On her catholic school girl skirt
N. in her hair
O. In the shower
P. on her shoes without telling her
Q. On her glasses
R. On her sister's ass
S. in her sisters ass
T. On her thigh high stocking
U. In your trusty bedside sock
V. On her pillow while she sleeps
W. right beside your Farrah Faucet poster when you were a kid
X. On her toothbrush
Y. Deep in her throat
Z. All of the above





JaD

A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods.

The bear turns to the rabbit and says " Do you ever have trouble with shit sticking to your fur?"

And the rabbit says " Nope, never have."

So the bear wipes his ass with the rabbit

*Note* never try this with a midget Originally Posted by notanewbie

LMFAO! Funny every time.....

Favorite place to cum?

A. In her pussy
B. on her tits
C. In her mouth
D. On her pussy/ belly
E. on her ass/ back
F. In her hand
G. On her feet
H. In her panties
I. On her face
J. In the living room while she sleeps in the bedroom
K. At the office under your desk while people walk by wondering what you are looking at on your computer.
L. Any place you can get away with
M. On her catholic school girl skirt
N. in her hair
O. In the shower
P. on her shoes without telling her
Q. On her glasses
R. On her sister's ass
S. in her sisters ass
T. On her thigh high stocking
U. In your trusty bedside sock
V. On her pillow while she sleeps
W. right beside your Farrah Faucet poster when you were a kid
X. On her toothbrush
Y. Deep in her throat
Z. All of the above





JaD Originally Posted by Jusanotherdude

It looks to me that JaD is planning to write a Dr Seuss book, the outline looks complete.

On her toothbrush??? LMMFAO

Sorry, all the funny ones that I know are about dogs. Somebody might thinck I'm a racer.

JaD, I am going with

In your trusty bedside sock

...Fifi has been berry berry good to me.

well or Lauren21 if she returns my PM.