Discussing the SO during an appointment.

Hercules's Avatar
Am I the only one where this is a total buzz kill?

When a lady asks "Does your wife know you do this" or "What would your wife think of you doing this"? My first feeling is why does she wanna know? So she can blackmail me?

And when I get these kinda questions in a condescending tone it pretty much means there will be no return visits.
  • T-Can
  • 02-21-2012, 12:36 PM
I think it's a total buzzkill when the provider starts talking about their SO!
Yes, friends....Don't talk about the SO unless you're going to bring her in with you for a WILD OUT couples session....or unless you want me to teach her DTbbbj lessons...oh wait, in that case nevermind...then you won't need to come see me anymore!
What else can you teach her, Italiana? Make a list...
It works both ways, my friend! Guys pry into our personal lives all the time. Just say "I'd rather not discuss that" and it should be fine .

Also, if you opened the topic up for discussion by telling her you have an SO to begin with, reconsider how much info you share with ladies if you don't want to discuss it.
Hercules's Avatar
Some ladies prefer seeing married men. So when asked I have no problem telling them my status.

But when the question(s) come out of left field on "how the wife would feel" about me boinking providers....Well that seems intrusive and somewhat presumptuous.
I agree with many. I dont care if the provider knows I am married. But no, please lets not discuss SO's during a session. There are maybe 3 providers I don't mind sharing personal info with like that but its only becasue we have developed a strong OTC relationship and when OTC, we tend to treat each other like friends who share things.
  • hd
  • 02-21-2012, 04:08 PM
I don't mind being asked if I'm married, but being asked what would my wife think about it is out of bounds.

A few of the providers I've seen I am very comfortable being personal with, knowing they have been married and divorced, have children and so on and I share with them also. And some people here I would not share with.

I'm thinking some providers might get off, as do the guys, knowing they're screwing someone's husband or wife. Just don't talk about it during the process.
Invisible1's Avatar
In general, I agree about not discussing or asking about the SO. But, on one occasion a while ago, the girl I was seeing said, "I can't believe your wife is missing out on so much fun. Let's do some more stuff that she won't do." Not sure what my expression was, but my mind was thinking... Well, I guess that is why I am here.
Am I the only one where this is a total buzz kill?

When a lady asks "Does your wife know you do this" or "What would your wife think of you doing this"? My first feeling is why does she wanna know? So she can blackmail me?

And when I get these kinda questions in a condescending tone it pretty much means there will be no return visits. Originally Posted by Hercules
I had a lady ask me that once. I replied, "Does your father know you do this? What would your daughter think of you doing this? Now STFU and suck." Ok, I didn't say that last part but it still happened that way.
Daen1304's Avatar
Well, I have never seen a provider when I had an SO. And I have told a couple that if I had an SO I'd being doing this with her. But from my experience, some providers ask about the SO to try to get a feel for the guy. Granted my experience is 80% AMP where screening is not really a thing. So they have to figure out someway to guess if your LE. But I have had some girls start to get nervous when they find out I had no SO.
If I had to talk about an SO, I think I would go on a guilt trip and cry. It's never ever good to talk about a SO!!!!!
  • Colby
  • 02-22-2012, 08:00 AM
In general, I agree about not discussing or asking about the SO. But, on one occasion a while ago, the girl I was seeing said, "I can't believe your wife is missing out on so much fun. Let's do some more stuff that she won't do." Not sure what my expression was, but my mind was thinking... Well, I guess that is why I am here. Originally Posted by Invisible1

Exactly! When i am with a gentleman...i ask before hand to get a feel for his schedule! Otherwise...i could care less about the SO. It is you and me baby!! That's it!!!
DownForWhatever's Avatar
oh man...I once had an appointment with one of the Uber-Chatters...and had to hear not only about the SO...but the damn kids...school...the teacher....etc. Had to put something in her mouth to make her stop. It worked.
Jariou's Avatar
Agree, some ladies are ok with seeing married men, but on a personal level, some don't mind sharing with someone you feel you can trust, or have had many relations with. It could go deeper than that, but beware, could be a boner killer.