Savoire Faire: What Was YOUR Ultimate Test?

An American, an Englishman, and a Russian were sitting at a Parisian cafe, arguing about the meaning of the French expression, savoire faire:

The American: "Savoire faire is what you have if you come home from the office, find your wife in bed with another man, and simply say 'Excuse me' -- then turn around and walk out."

The Englishman: "Not, quite, old chap. Savoire faire is what you have if you come home from the office, find your wife in bed with another man, and simply say 'Excuse me; please continue' -- then turn around and walk out."

The Russian: "Let's ask one of these Frenchmen. After all, they invented the phrase."

A Frenchman at an adjacent table piped up: "I've been listening to your entire conversation, and you have it all wrong. You come home from the office, find your wife in bed with another man, and simply say 'Excuse me; please continue' -- then turn around and walk out. And if HE can continue, then HE has savoire faire!"

A test of my own savoire faire: a couple months ago, I tried to set up my first appointment with a lady who'd piqued my interest. In one of her PMs, she informed me,

Will not have phone by tomorrow. However, I will be here at 1:00...

Adding directions to her place, and a description of her front door, she concluded,

Hope to see you!!

"WTF?" I thought to myself. "No 'phone? I rationalized: All right, maybe no "business" phone, and she doesn't want to give out her personal number.

Even though she had not opened subsequent PMs that I'd sent from late morning until ~12:30 PM on "Appointment Day," I pressed ahead, following her directions to the letter. I did send one last PM, informing her that I was on my way, adding:

If, for any reason, you need to cancel, call me on my cell 'phone,...

No call en route. "Good," I thought to myself. Arriving at her front door -- which appeared exactly as she'd described -- and wanting to get a laugh out of her, I turned the knob, not bothering to knock, and called out in a sing-song voice, "Oh, honey, I'm ho-ome!"

I found myself face-to-face with a bare-chested man, salt-and-pepper hair and brushy eyebrows, wearing nothing but a tan pair of cargo shorts. (As I later learned, it was the SO, who'd decided to pay a surprise visit.)

"I'm sorry, I obviously have the wrong address," I said, quickly exiting.

Did I have savoire faire? Doubt it. I don't know which went limp faster: My cock, or the bouquet of fresh tulips I was holding.

So, what was YOUR toughest test of savoire faire?

(Oh, and guys ... don't ask me who she is. The last thing I need is another hard vocabulary lesson, this one on the meaning of "discretion.")

Bravo, bravo Garyvee! You obviously did have savoire faire, being able to exchange a greeting and then continue on your way. And, getting through something we all hope never to experience, you have balls, too!

I don't know if these incidents qualify but here goes:

I was on a long date with a local provider (I think we were walking out from a movie) and I had my smart phone in my shirt pocket. Well, unbeknownst to me, it called my semi-girlfriend and she heard some interesting conversation. After a few minutes she called me and I answered a very pointed call from her. I listened for a bit, figured a good offense was my best defense, and replied "I hope you're happy because you have really fucked up this date." Believe it or not we did not break up and she accepted my visits into the hobby world. She would probably make a wonderful wife if I didn't already have one.

Another time I was in line for lunch at a well known eatery. There was a really hot lady in front of me, and I was shamelessly checking her out, but didn't say anything to her. In a minute her red faced husband angrily walks up, pokes me in the chest with his finger and says "you got a problem with my wife?"
I looked right at him and said "No, but she really is beautiful, and you're lucky to have her," and I gave him a big smile. He didn't say a word and sheepishly turned around.

I stayed in line and ordered the shrimp basket right behind them

GV - As luck would have it, tulips - even limp ones - make a great first impression.....

I am confident your certain "savoir-faire" was not wasted on Mr. Bushy Eyebrows....

Ammo -- Great stories both. You definitely have "The Right Stuff," my man. Years ago, I myself got "busted" for staring while riding the VIA bus -- but for an entirely different reason: next thing I knew, this Mexican with both forearms tattooed from elbow to wrist was right in my face. I looked straight ahead, not daring to tell him what was really on my mind:

"G**D***, that is one of the butt-ugliest bitches I've ever seen. I was just wondering whether that thing is a dude in drag."

And he obviously assumed I was lusting after her. What a deludenoid.


Lexi -- Thanks, Babe! I see you posted at 3:13: and of course, I fondly recalled the time you helped me start my Monday morning with a BANG!