Narcissism, Misogynism, and Johns

Hey mods...question.

Yesterday a male member brought up a very good, and valid point that would make for interesting discussion.

He pointed out that when you read many members posts you find behaviors displayed that match those associated with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

I notice that just as prevalent, often at the same time, are signs of deep rooted misogyny - use of words like "whore" or "hooktard", aggression towards females, general objectifying of females, and numerous other traits common among men who hate women such as those listed here http://www.lovesicklove.com/2011/07/...ate-women.html and here http://www.lifeskillsintl.org/Men_Who_Hate_Women.html or as noted here http://samvak.tripod.com/faq79.html where the relationship between NPD and misogyny are discussed.

I think this would be something worthwhile to address, especially from the perspective of the ladies. Is this something we could openly talk about or would it be considered a violation of ECCIE Forum Guideline Rule #16?

Thanks, and as always keep up the good work!

Elizabeth
cowboy8055's Avatar
Nice observation Elizabeth. Don't understand why some guys have to degrade women. It's never been my style. I would never call a woman a whore or hooktard. I imagine men that do this do have a hatred of women on some level. You simply wouldn't degrade women if you truly liked them.
roscoe14850's Avatar
whore[ hawr, hohr, hoo r ]
noun
1.*a woman who engages in promiscuous sexual intercourse, usually for money; prostitute; harlot; strumpet.

Take it up with the dictionary manufacturers, good luck getting that definition changed.
JONBALLS's Avatar
roscoe14850's Avatar
I currently don't really use it in conversation, but of it moves me further up Ms E's shit list I could make adjustments....
JONBALLS's Avatar
roscoe14850's Avatar
JONBALLS's Avatar
The Drummer's Avatar
Hey mods...question.

Yesterday a male member brought up a very good, and valid point that would make for interesting discussion.

He pointed out that when you read many members posts you find behaviors displayed that match those associated with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

I notice that just as prevalent, often at the same time, are signs of deep rooted misogyny - use of words like "whore" or "hooktard", aggression towards females, general objectifying of females, and numerous other traits common among men who hate women such as those listed here http://www.lovesicklove.com/2011/07/...ate-women.html and here http://www.lifeskillsintl.org/Men_Who_Hate_Women.html or as noted here http://samvak.tripod.com/faq79.html where the relationship between NPD and misogyny are discussed.

I think this would be something worthwhile to address, especially from the perspective of the ladies. Is this something we could openly talk about or would it be considered a violation of ECCIE Forum Guideline Rule #16?

Thanks, and as always keep up the good work!

Elizabeth Originally Posted by ms_elizabeth
Let me start off by saying that on a conscious level, I love women. I have no idea what goes on subconsciously! I’ll be the first to admit that I’m not necessarily a good looking man. So, I must take comfort in cultures as we have on this board.

That being said, don’t providers objectify themselves by simply plying their trade? I’m not into the objectification of women, but in this milieu it’s the nature of the beast.
roscoe14850's Avatar
I can't believe she refers to us as Johns! I feel so used, so OBJECTIFIED.....wait a minute.....
Some good insights on the attached thread from some truly "upscale" providers. Ironically, started by JB on the national forum.

http://www.eccie.net/showthread.php?...13#post2687813

One comment to make, is that there are many words, and different intents and meanings are presented in context.

I was with a "upscale" provider, when I used the word "escort" she did not like. Out of respect, I refrained from using the word escort in her presence, and I asked her how to describe what she does? and she used a great word to exclusively describe herself.

I will say, that if one refers to another, as say "hey hooktard", or "hey sleazeball", then that can be rude, but there could be a case where it is compliment. The right person calling me a sleazeball, can make me smile. I have yet to be at the AC, but I would not object to be called a sleazeball in certain circumstances.

I think a charge of misogyny is a bit steep, as most are here because of they absolutely love of woman, and spend all the disposable income to make love to them, and some like talking as much as anything. Misogyny is not an eccie trait, and I do not see a pattern by the mods encouraging misogyny. I would credit the mods, that they discourage bad treatment of the ladies, and will send notes to offenders. They close threads that are in appropriate as a statement that enough is enough.

An example of true misogyny would be in 3rd world countries, where woman are married of at 13, and discard for trash at 17. When they give birth in their teens, the doctor does not stitch them up right, and they are unable to control their bowels, they are deemed useless, and discarded, and the husband finds another 13 year old. Either way, the charge is trumped up.

If there are individuals that hate women, the root causes are not Eccie, or mod support.
JONBALLS's Avatar
its my method for screening hooktards....I only want the ones with a sense of humor
DDarkness's Avatar
I don't use the terms nor will I. What I look for in a provider is passion and a desire to rock my world ... at least three times in an hour!

Ms. E. I understand what you are saying and offensive comments are discouraged! Just as name calling, slanderous or potentially libelous comments, and general stupidity are disapproved of!

It just isn't right! Or Nice!

DD
Justin Heranus's Avatar
very well said lostforkate. Personality Disorder tend to show patterns. terms that people use can not always be considered a personality disorder. i know in parts of the boards like national for example where these terms are used as a normal thing. but if you go to a section where these terms are never used. well it will look like that person has a problem. which in fact the person does not have any problems. they are simply using terms which are normally and accepted by many.
very well said lostforkate. Personality Disorder tend to show patterns. terms that people use can not always be considered a personality disorder. i know in parts of the boards like national for example where these terms are used as a normal thing. but if you go to a section where these terms are never used. well it will look like that person has a problem. which in fact the person does not have any problems. they are simply using terms which are normally and accepted by many. Originally Posted by tsmtogo
By the way, are you a trained and licensed Mental Health Professional?