lmfao what a funny day

Lexxxy's Avatar
1. So today I get this message :
I follow you on the site I read your every post which is why I even follow threads and your personality is amazing I really want to see you I have some questions firstly I know you are extremely intelligent and up to date on pop culture but I was wondering if you will roleplay stupid and ditsy and how much extra does roleplay cost I hope I didn't offend you I mean no harm I just love big breasted bimbos like the real house wives on TV and dumb valley girls from the 80s and 90s I hope you reply to this.
I did reply, I asked if I could share his message and he said of course.
2. I always get a triple undertow aka breve blaster at starbucks before I bartend. It is 2 pumps of vanilla in the bottom of a short cup with an inch and a half of breve aka half and half with 1, 2, or 3 shots of espresso pit straight into the cup from the machine with either a spoon tilted to make the shots not drop too deep or the cup tilted so that the shots pool on top then you pound it like an Irish car bomb or you burn yourself. It got the nickname undertow because it is hot on top and cold on bottom. It is a yummy secret partner drink that I have been hooked on for 7 years. I got that and my iced venti 10 pump sugar free vanilla nonfat iced coffee. This vegan weirdo that looked like creeping death in a Bob Marley t came up to me and said "Drinking milk is condoning cow rape! Those poor animals get all molested and have their bodily fluids stolen! How would you feel if I molested your boobs and nipples?" My answer was "Well, that depends on how much you pay me to do it." My friend and I burst out laughing! He just stood there with a dazed confused look on his face.
3. This guy sitting at the bar told me how he somehow attracts "chicks with dicks" and that he tried it once but hated it. Then he asked me to wink at him if a chick he talks to doesn't look like she has a package. *Dies laughing*
4. A girl asked if we have the morning after pill OR a condom dispenser in the ladies room.I laughed and said "No, tampons only." because I thought she was joking. Her reply was "I wont need tampons anymore if you guys don't have either of them in a dispenser." I told her CVS was within walking distance and cut her off for the night.
What an evening! How was yours?
Dealing with idiots most the night. Wishing I had a little excitement tonight. Been to dull lately.
offshoredrilling's Avatar
not good. please keep posting or the posse will get larger. I have been wrongly found guilty of providers not posting. As I was risking live and limb working for a provider thinking a eccie guy was seeing strippers(see coed). A trial was held. Now I wonder if I was set up. Found the target and yup he was a seeing strippers. But now find it hard to get my report to the provider. please help and keep flirting with the other guys on the board so as not to join the posse. Thanks
what a hoot, you know I milked cows, and they like it! Cows really have a happy life.

I like hearing both (lexxxy and OSD) of yours Saturday night fun, as mine was pretty dull - thanks
not good. please keep posting or the posse will get larger. I have been wrongly found guilty of providers not posting. As I was risking live and limb working for a provider thinking a eccie guy was seeing strippers(see coed). A trial was held. Now I wonder if I was set up. Found the target and yup he was a seeing strippers. But now find it hard to get my report to the provider. please help and keep flirting with the other guys on the board so as not to join the posse. Thanks Originally Posted by offshoredrilling

Damn its gonna be awful queit in here soon OSD, just a bunch of pricks hanging out and chatting about providers all day and nite!!
Wow wait thats what we do anyways!! Please Lexxy say you'll never leave. I don't wanna have to chat with OSD all the time my head will be spinning from confusion!!!
Damn what am i doing up at 7am on a Sunday!! Ohh yes right got a Hockey game in a few. Have a great day all!!

OSD don't worry MS E will be back she knows we all love her here!!

PS why would a provider care if a guy was seeing strippers? She must be jealous!!! LOL
pyramider's Avatar
Its fun watching OSD lamenting on the judicial system on the icky.
Lexxxy's Avatar
Darlings, I'm not going anywhere until OSD buys me that chateau on the lake we talked about and gives me beard rides all day.
offshoredrilling's Avatar
I'm doomed
Lexxxy's Avatar
LMAO
offshoredrilling's Avatar


WWF may be on to her, just sayin. Ms Elizabeth in not gone. Hiding in Rochester as a young Happy Hoo errrr provider. so she not be posting.

don't tell anyone Lexxxy shhhhhhh