Do you say hi??

Woodyfunlover's Avatar
So last week I am shopping at Harps getting a few supplies I needed to a BBQ I was host when I noticed a drop dead sexy woman also shopping. While I admired her posterior side when we passed I gave her a friendly glance and smile. She seemed like someone I knew but could not place. I wondered about it for a while but needed to get my shopping done and get checked out. While I was putting my bags into my car she came out and started putting her bags in her SUV. Looking at her, her vehicle, and her license plate, it hit me who she was. A provider! We had never met but I made the connection.

So ladies here is the question. Should I have said hi and would it freak you out if a stranger came up and said " Hi, I am $$$$ your *^*^*^*^"????
knotty man's Avatar
you never met her ,but you knew her by her vehicle and her license plate?
very spooky! you sound very stalker "ish"
If I met a provider in public I knew and she was accompanied absolutely I would not speak. If she was alone, I would only acknowledge if she spoke.
A provider I had not seen would be as any other lady, entitled to her privacy. Contact is best kept professional. Most in the hobby keep it separated from regular life. It works best. Unless I have contracted for her time, I feel anything else is intrusive unless we have an understanding.
I've had this happen to me on a couple of different occasions in Walmart and other similar types of places. I'm always caught off guard and it's very disturbing! It may be innocent in nature – just a coincidence that you happened to be in the same place at the same time and recognize me – but, I still end up feeling "stalked."

If we already know each other, have had an appointment or developed a friendly rapport – that's different. But if I've never seen you before... and you know who I am but I don't know who you are – how would you expect me to take it? How would you feel? "Startled" is an understatement.
Woodyfunlover's Avatar
Once again Mr Chan's wisdom is bottomless!

I agree, don't want to be rude butmore important I don't want to be a stalker. The wall of separation is very important for discretion.
Woodyfunlover's Avatar
It might have been you Ginger but in reality it was the bulge of the .45 acp in your purse that kept me from saying hi!
TechOne's Avatar
And likewise, I have been "unhinged" by a provider who has "just said hi" in a store or restaurant, after realizing that I am a client of another provider. You ladies obviously share personal info about some of your clients, maybe only the dorky ones to stay away from, but you share, nonetheless.

On the flipside, I have seen many providers out in public and only have enough time to sit down quickly before my boner embarrasses me. Never would I say anything to her. I have had one that responded with her resume, to a business offer on CL, but I never revealed the connection, and never will.
Guest012617's Avatar
Good info. nice to know. Thanks
I have encountered this once. I visited with a girl once many months before but sidestepped into a different isle in the store and saw her again when checking out. She never noticed me and I only made one "oh shit" gaze when I first saw her and only casually noticed her when at the register. Would she have recognized me? I really doubt it.

If I've never personally seen her then I would treat that as seeing someone famous, you know them through various outlets but they have no clue who you are. Even though we all think we are cool, clever and awesome, many others aren't impressed when they aren't interested in meeting people. Notice, but don't be starstruck because we all have "normal" lives of buying groceries or toilet paper.

I would never make any contact in public! Always err on the side of discretion in this hobby.
willro's Avatar
If I had previously met her (and she was alone), I might smile and say hello in passing. Perhaps if I knew her well from a history of seeing her several times (and she was alone), I might have a brief, friendly conversation with her. If I knew who she was from photos, but we had never met, I would never approach her. I think it would likely make her feel uncomfortable. And, above all else, if she was not alone, I would never acknowledge her in any way. Everyone deserves to have a private life, and every person that might accompany you to a restaurant doesn't necessarily need to be involved in all aspects of your life. Privacy should always be maintained when possible.

I've never had this happen exactly, but I did see a dancer in a strip club that I knew from my "regular" life. She was the daughter of a guy I worked with a few years before. I had met her several times when she was a high school girl. It was a little awkward seeing her grown up and naked, and I knew she recognized me too, but she pretended she didn't. Sometimes regular life collides with hobby life in unexpected ways.
MrHappy4u's Avatar
Several years ago, I was having lunch in a well known LR eatery with a provider while discussing "real life" business. We passed by a gentlemen on the way to our table who smiled with a big grin on his face and winked - not sure if the wink was toward the provider or not since he was looking straight at me, I'm sure knowing I had a good chance of getting laid. When we were seated my lunch partner grinned and said, "I guess you know he hobbies". It is definitely possible to discretely acknowledge someone's presence in public without it being too obvious.

But NEVER under any circumstances would I, on a chance meeting, approach or acknowledge a provider in public unless we had a very close, personal relationship outside the hobby.

Then again, I have been tempted to squeeze the melons in the produce section at Kroger. . .
TechOne's Avatar
Then again, I have been tempted to squeeze the melons in the produce section at Kroger. . . Originally Posted by MrHappy4u
And this is where the lines blur between the hobby world and the SB/SB world...everyone has friends, some we get naked with, it's nobody else's business, but the walls have eyes and the 'church lady' has her opinion.
Sweet N Little's Avatar
The rule for me is to never acknowledge some one in public and I would expect the same courtesy, this game is all about discretion.

I have run into 3 or 4 girls around town and they were all ones that I had never seen professionally before so I did not say hello, and I only wanted to say hello to 2 of them anyway but the situations were definitely not right. I would probably just shoot them an email or a private message afterward and say hey I saw u at where ever u saw them and u looked great but didn't want to bother you. If they were one that I was currently pursuing I might shoot them a pm on here or P411 and let them know that I just saw them and who know where it might lead if they check their phone? But u could always say hello and flirt with them like u don't know what they do!
MrHappy4u's Avatar
The rule for me is to never acknowledge some one in public and I would expect the same courtesy, this game is all about discretion. Originally Posted by Sweet N Little
Dang, SNL! You mean the stock room at Kroger is off limits again?