Gas station

There was a cool pic with this statement, But I could not load it into a post:


Sex is like a gas station.

Sometimes you get full service.

Sometimes you have to ask for service.

Sometimes you have to be happy with self-service.

What happens after the government takes 35 percent of your paycheck?
The gas station takes the rest!

What is the President Obama's new fitness program to get people walking again?
Gas at $4 a gallon.

How bad are gas prices in Los Angeles?
Guys in Beverly Hills are hiring hookers to siphon gas out of other people's cars.

What is the new gas station payment policy?
We will TAKE your Visa, MasterCard, American Express, and Department Store cards!!

-Diet Snapple 16 oz for $1.29 = $10.32 per gallon

- Lipton Ice Tea 16 oz for $1.19 = $9.52 per gallon


- Gatorade 20 oz for $1.59 = $10.17 per gallon


- Ocean Spray 16 oz for $1.25 = $10.00 per gallon


- Quart of Milk for $1.59 = $6.32 per gallon


- Evian (water) 9 oz for $1.49 = $21.19 per gallon


- STP Brake Fluid 12 oz for $3.15 = $33.60 per gallon


- Vicks Nyquil 6 oz for $8.35 = $178.13 per gallon


- Pepto Bismol 4 oz for $3.85 = $123.20 per gallon


- Whiteout 7 oz for $1.39 = $254.17 per gallon


- Scope 1.5 oz for $0.99 = $84.84 per gallon


Just something to thing about.

Last Tuesday President Obama got off the helicopter in front of The White House - carrying a baby piglet under each arm. The squared-away Marine guard snapped to attention, saluted and said:

"Nice pigs, sir." The President replied: "These are not pigs. These are authentic Arkansas Razorback Hogs. I got one for Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, and I got one for Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi."

The squared-away Marine again snapped to attention, salutes and said, "Excellent trade, sir."