I may regret this thread later but I am out of this crap. The drama I just had to endure is just too much. The hobby is supposed to be fun. I was going to not vent but after a bottle of saki and sushi I am feeling randy. Any provider that knows me knows that I am ultra sweet. I mean sugar poetry sweet and I honestly care about people. I have been the foremost defender of the crazy provider as someone just dealing with life and more interesting than most due to life experience. Check out previous post. Manslut I owe you a huge apology.
The situation: I found someone to screw for right now so I do not need a provider to fulfill those needs. I wrote to a provider I had planned on seeing to let her know her services would not be needed because I did not want her to feel stood up. It was obvious she liked me during my last session and I had truly considered taking her out but she told me explicitly she did not want that because she was providing so I did not. Anyway, I attempted to maintain a friendship because I thought she was really cool.
Now I am supposedly an ass for trying to be polite and let someone know there services were not needed but they were not stood up. I mean am I supposed to pay for things I am getting for free. If she wanted to offer something for free I am on it. She seemed to think I only wanted her at a discounted rate. If i needed her i would have paid the 300 an hr I was just trying to do a hobby budget. I have a big hobby budget and was just trying to figure out how many times i could see her.
I understand she is a woman and wants to feel like she is not disposable but you are selling a product and if I can get the product for free I am not going to pay for it. Plus I am a one woman man and put everything I have into those I am with. I wanted to be her friend and go out for drinks and I got shit on and told I was an ass and offensive....and after an hour of texting back and forth and her telling me to screw off she sends me pics of her kid. What?
And you know what is the most fucked up thing about this.. I still wnt to have drinks with her and be her friend. I like her personally and to be honest, she needs a friend like me who is not going to tell her everything she wants to hear. We could make a difference in eachothers lives and that is rare. I am sad that she wants nothing to do with me. That is how the hobby fucks you up. This is nonfatmetal signing out. Peace!