Still sorta disturbed...

A few months back I met up with a young lady from a dating site..she was very nice and we chatted about sex and perversion and decided one night we would ravish each other. The night comes and she basically tells me to put up or shut up..ass play..ripped stockings..tourettes sex talk..things are going fine and the sex is literally flowing then she asks..

"Fucking choke me" I am like ummm pardon me? "You heard me, choke me" well we were all in at this point so I throttle her neck a little. Nope. She wants more. She demands more. I try my best to reach her level of desire and just couldn't bring myself to really go all out chocking her. She was obviously disappointed and we grudge fucked till we were done.

I guess I am asking..have y'all been on either side of this? Is this a harmful thing for either or both parties?? I am still a little weirded by it.

What say you?

(this is not a bragging type post..she way out fucked me)

I had a date ask me to hit her - as in leave BRUISES! (Hell, I don't even like hard spanking) I suggested we get dressed and I drove her home - never to return.

I wouldn't do it even if she signed a waiver, and made a video tape stating that she ASKED me to do it and she WANTED me to do it.

I know people do that shit all the time, but I don't want to take a chance and have the popo show up with her stating "He MADE me sign that! He FORCED me make the video! I didn't want to but I didn't have any choice!"

FUCK THAT!

Yeah I can't put my hands on a woman too hard.

In just my opinion, this is a very very selective arena of play; and most usually between two partners that know each others limits...

There are various pressure points on the neck, the back of the neck, lower and upper throat area that constrict or even restrict blood flow; if you are inexperienced in this play, it can and is very dangerous; I have only played with very experienced ladies who have known me for quite some time...

If it is something you both want to explore together, then take the time to research it first; start with the training wheels and explore, gradually increasing the sensations to see what your tolerance levels are...

Hope I don't sound like I am lecturing; but it is a very dangerous arena of play; you must go into it with a certain mindset, and complete trust with your partner...

no lecture, shoot no..good info.

There have been a few topics about this subject. Although it's sexy, I've certainly done it and had it done to me, it's exceptionally dangerous. People have been jailed for accidentally killing their sexual partner.

Even the high level kinksters tend to shy away from it. This is the best essay that I've read, by Jay Wiseman, about choking and his thoughts on it from the perspective of once being an EMT and now, an attorney. It's really good reading:

http://www.jaywiseman.com/SEX_BDSM_B...irst_Essay.php

I'll try to find the other topics for you to peruse. Just remember, it's in those moments of hot passion that a partner wants something. But a man's hands are VERY strong and if you don't know about pressure points, etc., someone could be seriously injured.

I, personally, believe that it shows good sense to have stopped when you did after she begged for more.

Elisabeth

P.S. Seemed like a hot time!

Edited to add: http://www.jaywiseman.com/SEX_BDSM_BreathPlayMain.php This is the most recent of articles concerning breath play with links. Very good source of information.

Join fetlife.com. There's a whole community of people into alternative kinks.

Sounds like she was looking for erotic asphyxiation. To do it right you have to take the person right to the brink of death. The adrenaline rush of the body overcoming the asphyxiation combined with the endorphins from sex is the thrill they are looking for. It supposedly is an incredible "natural" high.

I do not plan on seeing her again..I liked the sicko stuff we did but that is just too much. Thanks for the insight and links.

There was a front page story in the Daily News (NYC paper) with the title "Hung Fu" - story of the death of David Karridene. Liv'n on the edge.

Some women enjoy this type of thing. But personally I think it should be discussed beforehand.

Agrees with Janele.

Don't a lot of Law and Order episodes start this way?

Some women enjoy this type of thing. But personally I think it should be discussed beforehand. Originally Posted by Janele

x1000 what she said. It goes both ways. If you have fetish, talk about them.

(lots better to know before the heat of passion )

I have choked during play many times. It is not an odd request. The pleasure derived during penetration is incredible and usually leads to squirting. I bet she became very wet when you did this.