Definition and a sensitive question

What would you consider obese? 50lbs over weight? More? less?
Also, gents, when contacting a provider would you disclose that you are obese if you were or would you say nothing if there is no note on her website to do so? Ladies, do gents usually let you know in advance? Obviously I am asking this for a reason but I'm curious to hear the thoughts of others.

Thank you

Camille xx
atlcomedy's Avatar
http://nbcsports.msnbc.com/id/7129586/

Shaq?

I think conventional measures/definitions (e.g.BMI) are imperfect.

The real question is how does he wear it and what is it composed of (fat vs. muscle) -- but more important does one's weight cause health problems.

I'm curious as to your reason for asking the question. I would think that unless specifically queried to the contrary, a "pro" would accept a gentleman of any weight that showed at her door that didn't look like he was obese to the point that he might die during the session.

On the other hand, advertising "No Fatties" (as some women do) is a turnoff to many, including those in the not in the group (just as a NBA policy does).

So in that sense it really is a no win situation.
I'm curious as to your reason for asking the question. I would think that unless specifically queried to the contrary, a "pro" would accept a gentleman of any weight that showed at her door that didn't look like he was obese to the point that he might die during the session. Originally Posted by atlcomedy
No Atl. Is that really what you think? It's pretty off the mark if so. There are several women out there that will not see men under/over a certain age, of African/American descent etc. It is what it is. There is a common misconception that because a man is willing to pay a woman will see anyone (of course I am not including dangerous/non-verifiable men in this category). That's so untrue. For myself, I want to see someone I would hang out with had we met in another setting. The bottom line is if I don't enjoy myself (i.e. you) you are not going to enjoy yourself. It's not that complicated. Not all money is good money ATL.

For myself, I prefer not to see men over the age of 65 and also men that are obese. Both are primarily based on health issues..and come with some historical context. I met once with a gentleman that was obese and his breathing was so labored that I really felt uncomfortable. It placed limits on the session and I felt as though I was reeling myself in. It's awkward. I am also more concerned with health issues of men over the age of 65. For me, the risks are ones I don't want to take. Now, all that said, I don't mind at all a man who is carrying extra weight. Extra weight is extra weight..not a health issue to anywhere near the same degree as obesity. One of the reasons I asked is because I found obesity defined as "50lbs over your height/weight proportions" which sounds a bit light to me. I would have thought it was more than that. So back to the original question. Would a man say something or should a woman post something on her site?

C
Mazomaniac's Avatar
The medical definition (50lbs+) and the common perception of obesity are clearly different.

The medical definition is set at the point where the extra weight starts to affect morbidity and mortality. At 50+ pounds over optimum you're going to see a majority of people experiencing high blood pressure, higher risk of stroke and heart attack, higher risk of certain cancers, etc. This doesn't mean that these folks are ready to drop dead from a coronary at any moment. The medical definition is just there as a guideline for when doctors need to start stepping in and helping those people with weight issues as part of an overall health care package.

This does not mean, though, that folks 50 or more pounds over can't look good on the outside. In the case of appearance I think it's really each to his or her own.

There's a singer in a band that Mrs. Mazo enjoys who's probably 60-70 pounds over the medical definition. She is, however, damn sexy at that weight. Her body's all about the curves and the extra padding just accentuates it IMHO. She's well aware of her size and attributes and she makes the most of it with the way she dresses and acts on stage. She even makes it a point that she "got fat from fuckin" in one of her songs. If somebody's heavy and comfortable with it then I think they can be as sexy as they wanna be.

Personally, I'm not the athlete I was in college anymore but I'm not ashamed of it. My P411 profile tells it like it is and I'd respect any provider who makes a decision not to see me based on that factor. My personal preference is for "spinners". How can I complain if a provider won't see fat guys if I won't see big women?

If there's one thing I've learned in this hobby it's that honesty counts. If either side in the arrangement tells a fib about themselves or goes into a session with reservations then it's going to work out bad for everybody. I'd rather you tell me you're not interested and take the pass than show up for a session that both of us end up regretting.

Cheers,
Mazo.
atlcomedy's Avatar
. Now, all that said, I don't mind at all a man who is carrying extra weight. Extra weight is extra weight..not a health issue to anywhere near the same degree as obesity.C Originally Posted by Camille
Part of the confusion is "obesity" actually is defined (poorly) by the medical community. That was the point of my link. Per the medical definition many elite athletes are "obese"

I guess my point was more along the damned if you do, damned if you don't kind of thing....

On one hand a woman is perceived by some (many) in a negative light if she specifies what she likes/doesn't like...

...on the other if she really has an adversion to a race, age, body type, etc it is probably a good idea to state that..

...but if you haven't asked or he hasn't shared I'm suggesting you let him in. Maybe I'm off base. I've never been turned down at the door. But I guess I'm suggesting that at that point unless it is totally intolerable you suck it up (bad pun intended) and make the best of it.
Thank you Mazo. That makes a great deal of sense. As I said, I wouldn't consider 50lbs over as obese (I'm thinking more 100 + pounds) but your explanation tells me why it is flagged up at that stage...sort of a red flag to let you know which direction you are heading in.

The issue for me was that at 100+ over, the gentleman was higjly restricted in his flexibility and even in good old missionary, his breathing was extremely patchy and labored and he was breaking a deep sweat. That frightens me. An appointment is supposed to be fun and enjoyable, not frightening and stressful. I suppose if people take offense to the note on my website I will have to live with that..it's easier than living with the alternative for me.

Thank you again for sharing your thoughts/information.

Camille xx
atlcomedy's Avatar
even in good old missionary, his breathing was extremely patchy and labored and he was breaking a deep sweat. Originally Posted by Camille
I think the simple sight of you at my door would make my breathing extremely patchy and laboured....& I likely would break a sweat
Part of the confusion is "obesity" actually is defined (poorly) by the medical community. That was the point of my link. Per the medical definition many elite athletes are "obese"

I guess my point was more along the damned if you do, damned if you don't kind of thing....
Originally Posted by atlcomedy
I agree. The definition is patchy at best. It's also a bit insulting frankly. For the purpose of this post, Ill clarify that for me it's 100+ . I wasn't sure what others thought which is why I asked. Thanks also for replying.

C xxx
Ill clarify that for me it's 100+ . Originally Posted by Camille
Whew! I'm safe.
Mazomaniac's Avatar
Whew! I'm safe. Originally Posted by pjorourke
Yeah, I sneak in under the limit too.

And since Camille's dropping by my neighborhood early next week I may just have to hit the treadmill a little and hope she'll take a chance!

Cheers,
Mazo.
Keep coming at me with comments like that ATL, PJ and Mazo and I'll be in tears about leaving the US lol. Oh wait, I already will!!!

Kisses

C xxxx
Mazomaniac's Avatar
Keep coming at me with comments like that ATL, PJ and Mazo and I'll be in tears about leaving the US lol. Originally Posted by Camille
Worse yet, you'll now have to evaluate clients based on stone and hundredweight.

You'll need a calculator to decide who to see!

Cheers,
Mazo.
Worse yet, you'll now have to evaluate clients based on stone and hundredweight.

You'll need a calculator to decide who to see!

Cheers,
Mazo. Originally Posted by Mazomaniac
Haha! That reminds me of when my sister was here. She is a skydiving nut and I took her down to Orange to skydive there. As well as her credentials and insurance they needed to know her weight. She wrote down "8 stone" before going off to get rigged up. The lady behind the counter looked at me blankly and said "8 stone?" I felt like a translator when I said "112lbs" lol.

C x

btw, any skydiving enthusiasts in MA..stick to the dropzone in Orange. Do NOT use the one in Pepperell, MA.
sabre692's Avatar
I'm not afraid to admit that I am a fatty. I like who I am and am "somewhat" comfortable in my skin. Of course, me being a big boy does make oneself practice in other areas more extensively such as proper etiquette and mannerisms not typically found in today's modern man. If a provider does turn me down because of weight; that is her prerogative. It's even stated in my p411 profile.
What would you consider obese? 50lbs over weight? More? less?
Also, gents, when contacting a provider would you disclose that you are obese if you were or would you say nothing if there is no note on her website to do so? Ladies, do gents usually let you know in advance? Obviously I am asking this for a reason but I'm curious to hear the thoughts of others.

Thank you

Camille xx Originally Posted by Camille
This is a great question. I've noticed that all but one of my previous friends who would be considered obese failed to mention it before we met. But I think he did it for shock value. I don't think he was used to ladies being nice to him at all when it came to his weight. But I don't think he gave anyone a chance either. Everyone else volunteers some combination of age, race, height, weight, hair color and smoking preference in the first email.

I personally don't mind a thicker man. I've had some of my fondest memories with bigger men. No disrespect to my big boys, but I just want you to do what I tell you when I tell you. Go wash your ass, and pick your belly up and put it on my back in doggy. Clean the penis and don't hide it from me, and we won't have any problems. I hope this doesn't come off as insensitive, but the key is just don't be a spoiled sport about your size. It only gets in the way if you let it.