As a provider, what are your biggest challenges/fears?

I realize you all give a lot of yourselves for each session and in doing so, there's a variety of risks you take personally. As a provider I can certainly understand that the overall potential impact to your life and loved ones is of course one consideration that I'm sure each of you harbor in your mind, but I wondered if there were other things as well? I know there are full-time providers, part-time, sporadic/UTR types, etc. I'm interested in the perspective from all.

I realize this may not be a comfortable subject and I'm not trying to pry too far, I just wondered and I have a very real reason for asking this question due to some recent issues therefore I'm just curious about how you as providers feel about certain things. You can be as general as you wish and you can just PM if it's too uncomfortable and you prefer not to leave it openly here on the board. I will also share why I ask.

And to you hobbyists who are left groaning over me even asking this question, yes I know...I know, this isn't a fun sexy subject of taint or dangling penile induced muffin death. So, I'll leave you a nice piece of art below to look at even though I doubt most will understand it.

Thank you in advance for the responses, if any....

I get the art SD..... She's just been with you and now shes crying in her wine while you shower in the next room. Or maybe she's just bummed since she admitted shed rather have a nice glass of red than do me.... Who knows, its art.

I'm honestly shocked at the many things women reveal to me. I don't know how these ladies do it. Behind the facade of a provider is a real woman. I try and always keep that in mind without ever speaking about it.
Tony, yes, I suppose she's probably thankful that my own version of 1'3 dangling death has receded.

For me, I don't mind speaking about it. I like these ladies.
Jules Jaguar's Avatar
SD,

I'd love to talk about this subject with you... off boards, maybe next time we meet we can do lunch

Off subject but the real reason I had to respond is that I love that photo!!! I wonder if I could get it blown up and framed to hang up on the wall.
Tony, yes, I suppose she's probably thankful that my own version of 1'3 dangling death has receded.

For me, I don't mind speaking about it. I like these ladies. Originally Posted by SD2011
I like most of the ones I've met so far, even the ones that don't like me. As for the ones I haven't met yet: maybe someday or maybe not. And if they don't want to meet me, thats their loss.

I only have two more that I'd like to meet right now, and they probably don't even know it.
SD,

I'd love to talk about this subject with you... off boards, maybe next time we meet we can do lunch

Off subject but the real reason I had to respond is that I love that photo!!! I wonder if I could get it blown up and framed to hang up on the wall. Originally Posted by Jules Jaguar
Agreed. Lunch too!

On the photo, I can arrange that too. There is a mate to that one.
My biggest challenge is the fact that I have to lie to people outside of the hobby on a daily basis. The other day I was asked to join the PTA and get involved in things at school. I simply said, "no." Makes me sad.

I have realized that I have shut myself off from the outside world. I don't really have any friends outside of the hobby..because, I would have to lie to them. I don't get involved in school activities because for some reason, most people you meet, will ask you what you do for a living, first thing. I am not as close to my family (the ones that don't know what I do) as I used to be because, I have to lie to them.

Thank God for the friends that I have made in the hobby. Love you guys and girls.
My biggest challenge is the fact that I have to lie to people outside of the hobby on a daily basis. The other day I was asked to join the PTA and get involved in things at school. I simply said, "no." Makes me sad.

I have realized that I have shut myself off from the outside world. I don't really have any friends outside of the hobby..because, I would have to lie to them. I don't get involved in school activities because for some reason, most people you meet, will ask you what you do for a living, first thing. I am not as close to my family (the ones that don't know what I do) as I used to be because, I have to lie to them.

Thank God for the friends that I have made in the hobby. Love you guys and girls. Originally Posted by Reese Foster

That's so sad and you really seem like a good person. Funny, I always have a special spot for the providers that are mothers because I think it's extra tough for them.
Laura Lynn's Avatar
My biggest challenge is the fact that I have to lie to people outside of the hobby on a daily basis. The other day I was asked to join the PTA and get involved in things at school. I simply said, "no." Makes me sad.

I have realized that I have shut myself off from the outside world. I don't really have any friends outside of the hobby..because, I would have to lie to them. I don't get involved in school activities because for some reason, most people you meet, will ask you what you do for a living, first thing. I am not as close to my family (the ones that don't know what I do) as I used to be because, I have to lie to them.

Thank God for the friends that I have made in the hobby. Love you guys and girls. Originally Posted by Reese Foster

+1
I feel like Reese during my first year of providing. I avoided people, friends, and any social activities....I felt lonely and emotionally depressed. Then I chose to make a change and create a balance in my life and to not get in too deep in the hobby to keep my sanity. I make an effort to keep the hobby a small part of my life. Now I have a healthy social life, and a lot going on outside the hobby and I am very happy. All the friends that I have are outside the hobby and my secret life is none of their business. :-)
Another fear of mine is being outted.
I think Reese has probably covered the bases for 90% of the providers on this board. Maybe even more. It is very difficult having to keep this part of my life hidden. It's not even that I am ashamed of being in this industry, but everyone else's perception of it. I am grateful to the "handful" of gents and providers that I have allowed in to my inner circle. They have really made things a little easier to deal with. Kisses to you~ you know who you are
It's not even that I am ashamed of being in this industry, but everyone else's perception of it. Originally Posted by Kendall4U

Thank you, Kendall, for clarifying that.. I left that out of my initial response..but it is certainly how I feel as well.
Ladies, thank you for sharing. I admire your honesty. SD great question, hope you don't mind me pranking you. I know you love to do it. It was an icebreaking attempt.
To all of you - I'm sorry because all that have posted seem like sweet, smart, and grounded ladies. Ask me a year ago about "the hobby" and I'd have SUCH a different opinion. Because of this you learn not to judge people as much and I've learned to treat ladies even better than I did before because I appreciate what you do for me. I don't care about getting laid (well, let's not get crazy lol) what I'm missing at home is the closeness, feeling desired, and an excitement in my life. From the bottom of my heart, to those of you that are truly professionals - THANK YOU. Your sacrifice is appreciated and you're defiantly not just looked at as a piece meet but a counselor of sorts. I can promise to every lady that's been with me - I thank and respect the heck out of you. Dang, reading those tugs at the heart strings.
My biggest challenge is the fact that I have to lie to people outside of the hobby on a daily basis. The other day I was asked to join the PTA and get involved in things at school. I simply said, "no." Makes me sad.

I have realized that I have shut myself off from the outside world. I don't really have any friends outside of the hobby..because, I would have to lie to them. I don't get involved in school activities because for some reason, most people you meet, will ask you what you do for a living, first thing. I am not as close to my family (the ones that don't know what I do) as I used to be because, I have to lie to them.

Thank God for the friends that I have made in the hobby. Love you guys and girls. Originally Posted by Reese Foster
+1. Well said. Very. I don't have any family besides my children and at times its hard keeping my distance from others.

Thank you for saying such kind things about the ladies here EL214. I think you are great - a true gentleman.