Given this board’s pronounced disdain for that sub-species of homo-erectus known as SCUMINUS de TERRA or loosely translated as PIMP, Ole Shelton figured he would share the following series of events which occurred a couple of weeks ago.
Now, as some of you know, up until a couple of years ago Ole Shelton was fairly active in martial arts....specifically Tae Kwon Do. Ole Shelton has a quite a bit of hardware that he earned kicking the snot opponents who did not have the same dedication to training as Ole Shelton. Well, even though the days of running the national tournament scene may be behind him, Ole Shelton still keeps in touch with several very good friends in the martial arts community. Indeed Ole Shelton was invited to head to Vegas last month with one such friend, a 6th degree Black belt instructor. Vegas was hosting a tournament and my friend brought several of his students to compete.
Now Ole Shelton tells you all of the above because it just makes what you are about to hear all the more...well, I won’t say humorous, but shall I say...Karma appropriate.
One of my Friend’s students is a young college student and didn’t have the money to stay in the nicer hotels where my friend and I stayed, so he opted to stay down the way in a much older hotel down the the other side of the strip...way past the Riveria, Circus Circus, and the Strat’.....yep, it was waaaay off the beaten path. (It might have been a Super 8, but that don’t really matter) Well, anyway my friend and I decided to grab some of his male students and have a “guys night”. Our broke college kid didn’t have money to rent a car, so we ride down to get pick the lad up.
We are walking down the hall on the second floor and we hear commotion coming from a room. Figuring it was some domestic issue/lover’s quarrel we both look at each other and kinda make a face that say “Damn, glad that ain’t me in there.” Turned out to be true, just not the way we were thinking.
We had no more passed the door than it opened up and girl comes trying to barrell outta that room like she had a mess of wasps up her drawers. We kinda stop in the hall and hesitate...not so much wanting to get involved, but holding up to make sure everything is alright. Well, it ain’t all right.
Now my friend is a not a small boy...but not huge either. The thug piece of crap that came outta the room and grabbed the girl by the hair trying to drag her back in...now HE WAS a big ole’ boy. Well, about this time we move to intervene and as we are doing so I hear the girl screaming things like, “ I ain’t doing this anymore.” “ You don’t own me.”It may not have been clear to my friend, but Ole Shelton knew right away this was a pimp and he was muscling up one of his girls. My later view of the inside of the room confirmed this for me.
My friend got to Mr. Pimp first and was like “ hey hey hey...”. Mr. Pimp turns to my friend and girl takes off running. Mr. Pimp ignores us and starts after girl. My friend grabs Mr. Pimp by the shirt-tail and yells at him to “ Hold up, man”. Mr. Pimp turns and starts cussing us. Now my Friend is normally a very calm guy, but Mr. Pimp started bowing up to him and trying to get all chest to chest while he was spitting profanities. So, my Friend...still being very clam...pushed Mr. Pimp back and warned him “ Brother, you need to calm down, back off and do not touch me.”
Seeing a knife come out of a pocket ain’t nothing like the movies. It is scary as shit. You get that heart drop into your stomach feeling. But, whether it was his self-constructed bad-ass persona, liquid stupidity, drugs or whatever, Mr. Pimp decided it was good idea to flail open a butterfly knife. In the blink of an eye, my Friend had Mr. Pimp’s wrist twisted in a most unique and geometrically interesting position and was able to pluck the knife from his hand before he even got the thing fully open.
You may be asking yourself....Ole Shelton, where the hell were you while you friend, your host, your former instructor was fighting for his life? Trust me...Ole Shelton wonders how the above happened so fast also. Up until this point there was really no time to do anything and my frieind was the one closer to Mr. Pimp. However, this changed....
As my friend had both hands momentarily occupied ( one with Mr. Pimp’s wrist and the other removing the knife from his hand) Mr. Pimp began to reach toward his lower pants leg. This is when Ole Shelton pretty much shit on himself cuz I was thinking GUN. Well, Ole Shelton demotivated Mr. Pimp from reaching toward his pant leg with a well placed, fibula fracturing kick that Ole Shelton stills feels reverberating into his pelvis. My friend held Mr. Pimp still while I moved quick to retrieve the gun I thought he was going for. Turned out to be another knife. Still didn’t make me feel any better.
So, there we are....in the hall, holding two knives and Mr. Pimp crumpled in the floor next to his door....leg likely broke or at least hurting VERY badly. What does one do? We stood there for what seemed like an eternity trying to figure out the extent that we were gonna get involved in this. One guest had looked out the door but quickly went back in his room. We decided that this just was not worth all the headache it would bring and we left Mr. Pimp and got the hell outta dodge.
We called our young student and had him jump in a cab. He eventually came and bunked with one of the other students at the Luxor. I still have expect to be on video somewhere and to be tracked down....well maybe not, but maybe a little. Not worried, just do not have time to deal with it.