Bondage and Discipline on a First encounter?

Would providers be willing to be tied up in a helpless position on a first encounter or only after they trust their new friend? The vulnerability would probably scare some into not doing it. Would you as a provider?

B&D trust takes time to build and it takes more than 5 minutes to build a trust on
that level...so uhhh no..i would not trust someone i just met to put me in a situation as that..
and i wouldnt trust anyone that i have had 8 encounters with to put me in that situation either..

No bondage with strangers is one of the first and very hard rules of safe sane and consensual.

I know that there are Providers out there that specifically provide B&D and S&M services amongst other Fetishes. I have never been with one. For the most part these Provider's seem to either play the "Dominant" (controlling) role. If they are willing to be the "Submissive" or switch between roles depending upon what the client wants. They usually require a third party be involved for their Safety.

That being said. I have done B&D with an old Girlfriend at her request (she wanted to be "Dominated"). This was not an immediate thing and for my part fell more into the "Role Playing" catagory and not a Lifestyle choice. This was also the same Girlfriend that was really into Anal (Greek) sex (she was into several deviant things and this was during my "experimental" period). I would be willing to perform these acts again with a partner that requests them. But I'm kind of vanilla these days and stick to straight and Oral. However some of the Provider's I see do seem to like being talked "dirty" to and have their asses spanked during Doggie. This can be considered light B&D by some people.

I've done it on a first encounter (ymmv maybe) ....... I knew he had a major fetish for ropes.....I screened very thoroughly and we build up a pretty good rapport before our actual date. Of course tied me up good and tight but not tight enough (though everything was bound (breasts, torso, arms, hands etc.)) that I couldn't get out of. It was a really fun date.

Would providers be willing to be tied up in a helpless position on a first encounter or only after they trust their new friend? The vulnerability would probably scare some into not doing it. Would you as a provider? Originally Posted by mcgraw69

It will be very difficult finding a provider that will let you tie them up. If you do find one that's into BDSM she will most likely be a Dom not a Sub. Not a lot of females playing the role of sub in BDSM. And if they do their master is most likely female as well.

I met a sub that worked in NYC a few years back. She was the flavor of the month on a NYC based board and had great reviews. When we got together, it was my first time not only meeting with her, but my first and only dive into being "dom" during a session. I had fun, but it was too uncomfortable for my personal taste, but hey, I'll try anything once. She only lasted a few months on the board and from what I heard got knocked around pretty seriously by some jerk that didn't understand limits.

I met with another provider that on the first visit would only do CG. She said that she felt safer in that position and had a better chance of getting away if the dude tried to get violent. I actually thought that was a pretty good idea for her safety...plus being a lazy ass, I didn't have to do any work to bust a nut.

I would think a provider takes enough risks in the hobby without allowing a stranger to tie her up. For that matter, even a regular. How well do we really know each other anyway.

I'm kind of a sub in my private life, but I haven't come up with any way I'd feel safe being specifically helpless for a stranger. (RochBob's suggestion of third party involvement would work fine, I just assumed there wouldn't be many people okay with that.)

Even though it sounds like that lovely intersection between fun and profitable (and hey, we all know that scarcity leads to value!), I just haven't figured out a way to make it work I'm comfortable with.

I'm a very happy switch

It will be very difficult finding a provider that will let you tie them up. If you do find one that's into BDSM she will most likely be a Dom not a Sub. Not a lot of females playing the role of sub in BDSM. And if they do their master is most likely female as well. Originally Posted by cowboy8055

I would not tie any woman up, I am though SO interested in two women tieing me down
now that would be fun,

B&D trust takes time to build and it takes more than 5 minutes to build a trust on
that level...so uhhh no..i would not trust someone i just met to put me in a situation as that..
and i wouldnt trust anyone that i have had 8 encounters with to put me in that situation either.. Originally Posted by anita germane

What about if they had bacon? Hmmmm ...

Are you Kidding?

I love being bound up tight on the first date!

Life is too short to wait ....

Are you Kidding?

I love being bound up tight on the first date!

Life is too short to wait .... Originally Posted by Zabrina Sarafina

I always said I would never let anyone tie me up, but I did let one woman do it on our first date. It turned out good, but never wanted to do it again. I never have tied up a woman and never really wanted to until I saw Zabrina's post.

Just changed my mind!

Role playing bondage can be exciting...I have met many providers that secretly enjoy B&D, recently I have noticed a trend where the provider wants me to choke them and slap them in the face as well as other forms of mild pain. It's not for everyone but it is for some, I enjoy the dominant role and didn't know it until i was asked to grab a provider by her throat while she was cumming so i did and it was like unleashing a whole new fantasy. NOW i won't see a provider unless she is open to the idea. That's why I tend to go back to those that I know are open to receiving punishment in a fun way. for example...private detective confronts married woman about affair, so he tells her he will keep it a secret if she ?????....

I do A LOT of fetish, bondage, kinky, roleplay, training, and so on. I started that all before I got into this. But, I won't just jump into anything with anyone the first hand full of visits. I need trust and to start much smaller than that. I won't let anyone tie my hands behind my back outside of a D/s or SD relationship either.