Changing the roles...

I am off this weekend I thought it would be fun to read others reviews...

I am like everyone else some people you see and struggle thru the date for what ever reason. Then there are those that you like way to much and have to find a way to keep things on some professional level...

Then there is this... You see someones review over n over of different providers and you read the words he says talking about his dates. You find yourself fantasizing, wishing it was you he did those things to.

Is it OK to tell him that reading his words is like porn for me. I may not be his type. Is it ok to suggest just flirty emails? What's sad is not having a clue what he may look like. So many factors, all of which make it even more sexy...

I was talking to a trusted guy friend in the hobby, I asked if it was ok to ask for a day a year that we as providers could pay our favorite client or maybe pick someone totally random and he suggested that he would be flattered if a woman approached him with thoughts as I had. Heck, he said he would not need to be paid for his time either.

So what about it gentleman? Can a woman approach you and you see her as being serious in her desire or are you going to be jaded and thing its just about making $. Sadly we are all abit jaded in the hobby. I just know that a few of you have truly intrigued me and helped my 'selflove' time tremendously.
Maybe you could just write porn for me...

OK done rambelimg out my thoughts, I would love to hear yours...

Here's my two cents worth:

Speaking only for myself, if I were approached in such a manner I would certainly be flattered. I would also be immediately wary and most likely very confused since I know you are an active provider. Let's say you contact me telling me how much you love my writing and would like to become pen pals. Then you offer me $300 for an hour tryst and we hit it off. Now I want to see you again but I'm wondering--should I expect her to pay me again, do I pay her this time, or is it going to be for free from now on? I believe the only way such a friendship would work would be to make it a non-business relationship. Then that opens up a whole new can of worms.

I hope I haven't missed the point, I think it's a very interesting topic.

You are right on the mark...

This is why we need a day set aside for such activities... I have heard my whole life women can propose on leap year. Beltane, well there were / are some sexual freedoms... So why should our little culture not have such a day...

I admit if I were visiting his town and I was having down time, I am confident enough in my skills to let him take me for a test drive... Yes there is a for profit aspect some women would never consider for various reasons, but we all date and have had meaningless one nightstands off the clock...

If his reviews are accurate and he is not a total fictious writer at least I would be guranteed amazing sex...

I've "hit it off" with a few providers over the years, usually resulting in extra "off the clock" time, either after the date or the next day, or the next visit. Dinner, drinks, etc... An IRL date, sort of. I don't have any problem with it. We may play in the hobby, but we're still men and women, and attraction is natural, especially considering most providers are pretty damn good looking, and most career hobbyists are successful enough to be confident in their own skin. Men like pretty girls and women prefer confident boys... It's just natural. Add to it, the unfamiliarity of a strange town, being away from home, etc... Why wouldn't you call the one person you know to hang out?

I remember decades ago the Sadie Hawkins Dances in high school, where the girls would ask the boys to be their date. For those of you too young (like the OP) to remember the Lil' Abner cartoons in the daily newspaper, you will just have to google or wiki Sadie Hawkins Dance.

So, if the OP is suggesting a Hobby Sadie Hawkins Day, where the providers get to invite a favorite prospective client for a date, there is only one thing I can say:

I LIKE IT!!

And, the lady doesn't have to "pay" her chosen client. A one time freebie or off the clock session to sample the goods, as it were is certainly enough for me, and I am sure most every gentleman here will agree. And, the free part takes the jaded part out of it; otherwise we will just think that the lady is just trying to drum up additional business. Put this together with a meet and greet and you have a beginnings of a great tradition.

One question - we don't have to wait until November for this, do we???

There's nothing at all wrong with what you suggest, Heidi. When, in the course of human relationships, could it be wrong for one to fancy another in any regard. It's not.

But, as has been suggested, it could be confusing for some. That would be temporary I think. Generally in the hobby men have been conditioned to be wary. Most of us who have been around for any length of time will interpret the overture as 'I like your writing...so let's hang out and later you can pay my rent.' The established 'day' that you suggest might alleviate that. I don't know but it's intriguing.

Good post.

TheOtherMan... I have had long lasting affairs with clients that was not about a payday. It made sense. I have a gent that frequents this board that a year ago could have gotten me to hang up my garters but he was the one that functioned better as a working relationship...

Woodford... You always have a spot on my dance card on or off the clock... Maybe we should have a game and hook each other up with someone on the board we think would make a good match... Would be fun to see if we really knew the others tastes...

Contralto... Your correct. Any initial confusion would be over after the first kiss. Either you click or you do not...

What I know is I love adventure and I need to share passion. So lets get busy sharing...

This is why we need a day set aside for such activities... I have heard my whole life women can propose on leap year. Originally Posted by heidis_pleasure

Closest I get to this is booking ladies for overnights during daylight savings time when we set the clocks back an hour. Gives me one free hour to mess around lol.

I like the idea. But since I work hard to remain UTR, I'm probably out of the running. Still a great idea.

I've entered "the friend zone" with many providers to the point where we would hang out/go do things off the clock, but it was also unspoken that nothing physical would happen during these times too.

As Crazylegs said, I'd be flattered & wary if I got an offer like you're suggesting (even if there was an underground holiday that I likely wouldn't know about). I enjoy giving pleasure - hell, sometimes that gets me off more than anything else - but I'm not sure what the best way I would want to be approached really is. Part of the lure of all of this for me is that is payment for a service and afterward there's no strings and everyone is free to go their own way.

The best sounding option for me, realistically, would be a provider approaching me with what she wanted but offering me credit instead of payment or even a freebie (which for me lands things in a grey area, but that's one of my hangups).

Interesting thought(s) though. This will be running through my head for a while