Donation before or after?

GP's Avatar
  • GP
  • 11-04-2011, 01:51 PM
Jen's recent thread and OSD's post in that thread made me think about this subject.

I have heard so many times from ladies that it is the cardinal rule to get the money up front. I have also heard from the men that the golden rule is to pay after services are rendered.

I like to think that it is fair that it be left in a visible location as soon as the client walks in, and it is left untouched until the client leaves. Whether it is in an envelope or not makes no difference to me. I think not being in a envelope would at least give the lady an opportunity to see that the proper amount is there.

I would like to hear thoughts from both sides of this dilemma.
cnym's Avatar
  • cnym
  • 11-04-2011, 02:03 PM
I like to think that it is fair that it be left in a visible location as soon as the client walks in, and it is left untouched until the client leaves. Originally Posted by GP
My preference would be after, I say that because I have been Burned by even the "verified" providers.

I like the idea of leaving it visible as you stated.

I never pay for Dinner at a 5 star restaurant before I eat !
But I do pay for fast food before I get it from the drive thru window !!!
Like you said after what I went through yesterday I would like it set on the dresser not in an envelope so that way I can see the amount.I think that the money is the hardest part of the meet and I hate asking for it.Usually the men excuse themselves to the bathroom and put it in there.I think if the provider has enough good reviews that you know she isnt gonna rip you off the money should be taken care of at the beginning of the session before anything goes down. Btw great topic GP
Doove's Avatar
  • Doove
  • 11-04-2011, 02:12 PM
I never pay for Dinner at a 5 star restaurant before I eat ! Originally Posted by cnym
No, but you pay for the football tickets before you're allowed into the stadium.
If the client has a good reputation I don't care about being paid afterward. However, it does make the provider more comfortable to know that the donation is there and the session will probably flow a lot easier having the assurance that she'll be paid for her time.
I can see the hobbyists perspective on this though about being ripped off. In fact, I think hobbyists are ripped off more often than providers are. A provider can pretty much do anything she wants once the money is handed to her. Catch 22 I guess.
cnym's Avatar
  • cnym
  • 11-04-2011, 02:15 PM
I think that the money is the hardest part of the meet and I hate asking for it.

I think if the provider has enough good reviews that you know she isnt gonna rip you off the money should be taken care of at the beginning of the session before anything goes down. Originally Posted by JEN OF SYRACUSE
Jen
Here is my opinion for whatever it is worth.
I always leave the envelope in plain view on the dresser where it is visible at the beginning of the visit.

If the Gentleman has enough references then YOU know that he sint gonna rip you off the money .

And if you think that the Guys do not get ripped off even by providers that have good reviews, I am sorry, But you are mistake. I learned the Hard way. Just like you learned yesterday

Now you can read it both ways.
This whole business is based on TRUST.
This is like the story of the Chicken or the Egg.
jokacz's Avatar
I like the no B.S. Canadian method. The SP tells you how much, you give her the money, she counts it, and you're off to the races. This whole Kabuki dance with the envelopes is as useless as the "you are only paying for my time" disclaimer. What judge do you think you are going to fool?
MC's Avatar
  • MC
  • 11-04-2011, 02:17 PM
I tend to pay at the very beginning. I'd rather get that part of the session over and done with.
jokacz's Avatar
This is like the story of the Chicken or the Egg. Originally Posted by cnym
_
offshoredrilling's Avatar
I like leaving after. Count it out out after with her watching. Or leave in view fanned out. Not leaving till I see it was picked up. But will give at the start if asked. First time with 50% of the time was asked up front. Almost never after the first time.

I want to do a poll from Jen's thread. But want a mod to at least lie that no one can see how folks vote.

edit and I hate the envelope. Its silly.
offshoredrilling's Avatar
No, but you pay for the football tickets before you're allowed into the stadium. Originally Posted by Doove
and pay the doctor after. Ahhhhh chooooo sorry I still have a cold.
  • edcba
  • 11-04-2011, 03:08 PM
This is based on trust and I hope not everyone is a sleazeball, like the one jen encountered.i think leaving an envelope in plain sight at the beginning is a good gesture, it might turn me off if someone starts counting the money in my presence.
Jim Fett's Avatar
With a new provider, I always leave the $ fanned out on a desk or dresser in the beggining of session. i always grab her boob under the bra prior to money coming out of pocket. I have never had a women say no to this. Money is kept on dresser till session is over. If it's my regular it never matters. I had to run out a catch her leaving my place once cause I forgot to pay her.
I think if the provider has enough good reviews that you know she isnt gonna rip you off the money should be taken care of at the beginning of the session before anything goes down. Originally Posted by JEN OF SYRACUSE
Pre - perferred donation plan.

Afterwards I'm too
I've been 'had' so many times due to 'trust' in hopes that I'll be compensated correctly after a date. I've been shorted anywhere between $10-$100. One gent had the nerve to tell me that I could make up my loss with the 'next dude' (really?? I'm not operating a revolving door)

I've also been left with counterfeit $20's (which led me to use a fake bill detector pen)
I've been left with a mix of writing paper and bills in an envelope. (no envelope required here)
I've had to make uncomfortable phone calls asking "where the donation was hidden??"
"Oops...forgot to leave it...catch ya next time, k?"

To top the cake, I had one gent which I had seen quite a few times, tell me AFTER our date that he thought this was a 'friends with benefits' arrangement because we had seen each so much. (empty pockets and I don't ever remember ever telling him that I'd see him at no donation) BUT he did offer me as many platters of cookies for the holidays that I wanted from his bakery (WTF)

I can see both sides of the coin but damn...I can't pay the bills with platters of cookies!!

So with me...I like to just know it's there in plain sight at the beginning of our date.
These are just a FEW of my reasons.

Ohh and btw...most of these incidences were with gents who had references. I let the ladies know, too.

I'm not a restaurant so that reference to one doesn't fly with me.