"I Know Her REAL Name..."

Look at it this way, the guy is doing you a favor telling you that. It's fair warning to you to watch what you say around him. A guy bragging about knowing someone else's personal information likely has issues. Originally Posted by TinMan

+100000 Also if that hobbiest is willing to discuss personal information of an another provider to you then what makes you think he is not discussing your personal information with someone else

Reese Foster hey you told me your name is Scarlett Johansen i guess I am That Hobbiest

I think TinMan's and TheWanderer's responses are very insightful.

fast forward five years (4 after last contact with my "good friend / provider") and she decides to call my house and chat with my wife....thank god I outed myself a couple of years back - so lesson to all - be careful with personal information. Originally Posted by mtabsw

Wow, that is really fucked up even for the escort world for someone to out you after four years of no contact. Just curious and if it isn't too personal, what in the world would motivate her to do that? I've heard some crazy stories, but to out someone after such a long time would have to be near the top. As you said, cannot emphasize enough the need to be careful with your personal info.

Shiloh,

He's just bragging on one hand and on the other, he's telling you he cannot be trusted. If a provider chooses to give me her real name, that's between us.

In the case of Reese Foster, we all know her real name is Claddie Mae Smokinass. Just wanted to get everyone straight on that one.

C

Sometimes it just happens or has to - for example buying airline tickets.... Which I did - fast forward five years (4 after last contact with my "good friend / provider") and she decides to call my house and chat with my wife....thank god I outed myself a couple of years back - so lesson to all - be careful with personal information. Originally Posted by mtabsw

What's that about??? Some step in a 12-step program??

I'm surprised at how many gentlemen ask me for my real name on our first meeting.

The very funniest was a trusting soul who asked if my real name was Rose. I just smiled and said "Would I blur my face but use my real name?"

On the other hand some women like to tell me personal stuff as a sign of trust. I always tell them I don't need to know that because with my luck right after she gives me her info she'll get outed and it'll look like I was responsible.

From now on I'm gonna tell them to keep that info to themselves unless they want to be the next Mrs. Hercules!

I think TinMan's and TheWanderer's responses are very insightful.



Wow, that is really fucked up even for the escort world for someone to out you after four years of no contact. Just curious and if it isn't too personal, what in the world would motivate her to do that? I've heard some crazy stories, but to out someone after such a long time would have to be near the top. As you said, cannot emphasize enough the need to be careful with your personal info. Originally Posted by Waldo P. Emerson-Jones

I wasn't clear - I had already outed myself so her call wasn't more than rubbing a little salt in the wound. She told my wife she knew me, and hoped I could give her a little help.

I did call her back - and told her to not call again - it sounded like she was impaired and I'm guessing grabbing at straws in desperation - I hope she finds the help she needs.

Easy advice - hard to follow - tell your SO now - sooner or later she/he will find out - it even happened to one of my rotation awhile back. From what I've seen here, people seem determined to bring everyone down when they are spiraling out.

I hate it more than anything ,when I hear that a gentleman has been talking to other gentlemen or ladies about my personal info that is by the way, usually not true. Rumors get started that way and really do no one any good.

Reviews? Cool, that is the purpose of them, but to let other guys know exactly when you are scheduled to see a provider and the details of where you are going ETC. prior to review is very rude. I do not want my business, personal or otherwise disclosed to other people. Especially, people that I have never come in contact with.

Ladies, just because you hear or think something about another lady, doesn't make it fact and to talk to your client about another providers personal business whether true or not, lacks class and discretion.

I have shared my name with VERY few trusted clients. I trust them to keep that info to themselves. I do not understand the purpose of telling anyone else that info, unless you think it makes you look cool or you have ulterior motives.

Bottom line is...it's not cool. When I screen, I obtain a gentleman's personal info. I don't tell anyone else that info....so ladies and gentleman, please return the favor. Originally Posted by Reese Foster

There are several here that know "my real name" or me personally.
The way I look at it, If I let you in, its because I trust you and don't take advantage of it.

I've been around a while and have made many friends here in the Hobby.
Some of us have parted ways, some I will have a lifetime friendship with.

I know there are some who disagree with the information I volunteer or whom I associate with here.
But, I do not have anyone to answer to nor do I live my "life" being paranoid because someone I met in the Hobby has my name.

I am a very honest person and have no need to lie to anyone about who I am.
If I can't trust who I confide in, there is no reason for me to be involved in any kind of friendship/relationship with that person.

I would like to believe I am a pretty good judge of character, but I have made some poor decisions in my choice of friends here.
I know there a quite a few who don't care for me based on my attitude or how I carry myself.
Doesn't bother me, as I can't please everyone, but I am somewhat cordial as I have to work with them.

There are those I have withdrawn from and kept at a distance because I have now learned of the negative feedback, followed by drama.
I am grown and have no desire for the bullshit.

Having a "friendship" with anyone should not be difficult.
I demand respect and offer the same loyalty to those I engage with, but seems as though some lack the ability to reciprocate.


But here is an example of why -

*Last week I had a Provider PM me with a follow up to an appointment she had with a well known Hobbyist whom I gave an okay.
She explained some things that reminded me of why I didn't see him any longer.
He had diarrhea of the mouth about our activities, how "close" we were and all of the time we spent Non-BCD at "Social" gatherings.

Clearly, he got it twisted.

From what I got based on her PM -
I don't appreciate the picture he painted to her, nor do I give two shits for her attitude if I chose to engage with any Hobbyist OFF THE CLOCK.

The last I checked, we are all fucking for money, so I refuse to allow anyone tell me how to run my business.
No one is better than anyone here and I am a Veteran now opinion is not needed.

Everyday is a learning experience and I do see how there are security issues.
I have had my share of that as well.
Even though I come off pretty hardcore, I have to maintain a backbone so I don't have any BS to deal with.
I've been harassed.
I've been threatened.
I've dealt with crazy.
Whatever......


You can screen all you want.
You can be friends for years with a Provider/Hobbyist and realize you don't really know that person.

Things just happen

Perhaps I am still very naive. To me using that info against someone is not even in my vocabulary or even a thought. I can understand needing to protect yourself maby I am too trusting but for me personally I am very selective. I take a genuine general interest in someone. When I am with them they take a little peice of me with them. If they want it or not when they go. That's just the way I am. When we are together she is the most important thing in the world to me, and her comfort and happiness is a bonus to me and what I strive for in the brief time we share. I don't ask flat out what her name is, out of respect. Although I would love to know "who's" eyes I am lookig into in the most romantic sense. But again, sadly that is not always the case it seems. It could easily be said that I have school boy crushes on the select few I choose to see, so maby I confide too quickly and let the school boy crush take over. Some parts of this "hobby" I choose not to seek knowledge of, because for me it takes away from the meeting of two people and everything that comes after. unlocking the secret to "who" (name)the goddess I am with, is a treasure that can't be taken for granted. Then again you both could just "click" and after the shock of meeting someone for the first time and then you get all this personal info and it just adds to "connecting" As far as talking with other girls, I have never shared personal info no names, addresses, hotel choices, life/ personal family stuff ect, I don't see why you would compare another woman while with someone else,to try to argue into telling information she is not comfortable with sharing, but sometimes it's hard not to know where the line is unless you cross it once in a while, but that's just me. I tell my name and give my phone number, most would say that's stupid but like I said, I am very selective and mostly feel comfortable sharing and I trust my gut feeling. Where I woud never want a woman I see to go is anywhere she is not comfortable. Sadly it seems I do have more learning to do.

I hate it more than anything ,when I hear that a gentleman has been talking to other gentlemen or ladies about my personal info that is by the way, usually not true. Rumors get started that way and really do no one any good.

Reviews? Cool, that is the purpose of them, but to let other guys know exactly when you are scheduled to see a provider and the details of where you are going ETC. prior to review is very rude. I do not want my business, personal or otherwise disclosed to other people. Especially, people that I have never come in contact with.

Ladies, just because you hear or think something about another lady, doesn't make it fact and to talk to your client about another providers personal business whether true or not, lacks class and discretion.

I have shared my name with VERY few trusted clients. I trust them to keep that info to themselves. I do not understand the purpose of telling anyone else that info, unless you think it makes you look cool or you have ulterior motives.

Bottom line is...it's not cool. When I screen, I obtain a gentleman's personal info. I don't tell anyone else that info....so ladies and gentleman, please return the favor. Originally Posted by Reese Foster

absolute wisdom!!!
and that is another reason why i call you Ms Foster.
[unfortunate that i couldnt visit w/ you and fawn this afternoon :^( ]

The only problem is knowing which name to scream out while busting a nut. That's why all their 'real' names are Babe.

Seriously in today's information age if someone REALLY wanted to know someone's identity it would not be difficult to obtain. The question is who would think it necessary to do that and for what reason? Originally Posted by Hercules

with hundreds if not thousands of men and women in our little part of this sub-culture in dallas, i'd be surprised [pleasantly] if we never heard about people fucking up and doing stuff like Shiloh said.
not everyone is sharp, witty, or wise.

I guess I am still new and naive, but I must say that I am very disappointed that this topic even has to be raised. ... What I don't understand is why anyone would want to draw reality into play.

I'm here because my reality is far from perfect. So here is this fabulous playground that exists to fulfill otherwise unobtainable dreams. It has very few rules except for basic respect and courtesy. Act like ladies and gentlemen, and anything can happen, anything can come true, at least for a few hours at a time.

I guess this must be a case of I don't know what I don't know, but it strikes me as disappointing that members of our community have such little regard for the safety and well being of others. Originally Posted by Caleb

see my above comment.
and note what i underlined in your post.
anything CAN AND WILL happen - deliteful or not.
esp. when you least expect it - deliteful or not.


on the other side, i've consulted w/ a few women who have shared waaaaaaay more than i would ever consider wanting to know about them, their clients, their family, their friends, their enemies, their finances.

as soon as that starts [or her asking for money], i remove her from my gcho or gvha list muy pronto!!

I do appreciate the responses so far and am very intrigued by the advice and wisdom of the gentlemen. Helps me to have a better perspective on things. I also appreciate and respect ladies wanting to maintain their privacy.
A first-time client once said to me, “I really like you and would like to continue to see you on 2 conditions: Never call me babe AND Never talk about clients.”
Perhaps I should set the tone with new clients from the beginning. No talk about other providers! I don’t want to know if she is married, has children, had a pimp or has a job. I especially do not want to know where her incall is located!!! I am particular about who I invite to my incall and would hate for that information to be so easily shared.

I wasn't clear - I had already outed myself so her call wasn't more than rubbing a little salt in the wound. She told my wife she knew me, and hoped I could give her a little help.

I did call her back - and told her to not call again - it sounded like she was impaired and I'm guessing grabbing at straws in desperation - I hope she finds the help she needs.

Easy advice - hard to follow - tell your SO now - sooner or later she/he will find out - it even happened to one of my rotation awhile back. From what I've seen here, people seem determined to bring everyone down when they are spiraling out. Originally Posted by mtabsw

Thanks for response. I think I wrongly assumed from your first post that she called your wife with the purpose to do you harm, but I gather now that she was just being indiscreet. Still, the harm to you (if you hadn't already told your wife) could have been the same, so an excellent reminder to be careful with your personal info. I guess I should not have used my real name with which to sign up on eccie.

Here's my take on the "real name" thing:

I've met many ladies during my years in the hobby and have known many of these wonderful women's real names. But...as soon as I learned them, I quickly put them out of my memory and kept on calling them by their "stage name". lol WHY, you ask?? Firstly, because I'm getting old and keeping 2 or 3 names for each lady is confusing to me, but mostly out of respect for the lady herself.

These women have provided me with such pleasure and excitement through the years that I would never want to think that a miss-spoken word by me could ever affect their private life whatsoever! I appreciate the sharing ..... but for me, I prefer to believe it's all fantasy.

BTW...I'm looking forward to my next "name of the hour"! but... Please, don't make me call you Trixxie or Contushia or Luvyou Longtyme! LOL

MM

It works both ways. Nobody really really needs to know anybody else's REAL name, I think the old school "Honey" "Babe" and "John" were just fine. I don't care where you get your dog groomed or eat Chinese, I have Google for that. And outside of an alert anybody who tells tales out of school is an alert themselves.

I have shared my name with VERY few trusted clients. I trust them to keep that info to themselves. Originally Posted by Reese Foster

Trust is the right word.

I am too embarrased to explain how one nice lady on here found out my real name. She felt so guilty that she discovered it, she felt compelled to tell me hers. Sort of like the logic of nuclear weapons. Back in the day they referred to it as Mutual Assured Destruction (MAD). And so far, so good.

I for one, would rather not know (even though in many cases, I do). It is quite a responsibility. And a matter of trust; a matter of honor. In this I don't see any shades of gray. A person is trustworthy, or is not.

Reese Foster hey you told me your name is Scarlett Johansen i guess I am That Hobbiest Originally Posted by Thatdude

I would for sure tell someone that if I could get by with it...she is gorgeous!

In the case of Reese Foster, we all know her real name is Claddie Mae Smokinass. Just wanted to get everyone straight on that one.
C Originally Posted by coven

Omg! I needed that laugh! Claddie Mae Smokinass. I have an idea for that one.