Can you stop being a monger? Can a provider stop being a provider?

I've left the hobby for a couple years at a time when I've had real boyfriends...it isn't hard for me at all. The only thing that ever brings me back to the hobby is the need for money and since I don't date broke ass guys in real life that means if I'm in a civie relationship "the hobby" a.k.a cheating on my boyfriend is the very last thing on my mind. A decent boyfriend that pays attention to me and can afford to take care of me takes away the need to hobby on my end of things. Originally Posted by Reya Sunshine

Your honesty is refreshing as always

sixx

Eventually it will happen for a variety of reasons such as Father Time, physiology, decrepitude, a lack of or limited funds, etc. I do leave the hobby but always seem to gravitate back. The spirit may be willing but the flesh is weak. I often want to quit after a particularly bad session, one of those "What was I thinking?" moments. Then I open this site, see the new blood, read a few reviews and it's off to the races once more. I blame Pfizer for this.

I blame Pfizer for this. Originally Posted by txtorn8do

Is "mongering" listed a s potential adverse side effect? Maybe we can start a class action suit...

I have no need for variety when I'm with someone. It's surprisingly easy to stay away.

honest answer: Nope I cant. Too spoiled w the exotic and beautiful endeavors, dates, money, exotic food and drinks, hotels, playing, dressing up, taking it off... just cant. Now if i fell in love w someone who could offer me all this...then maybe... but has never happend. If I ever grow tired of it... then Ill move on, til then, Im still young, and living my underworld life to its fullest.

I dont think the men who like variety can stop. Unless they become tamed by true infatuating love...that lasts...catch 22 I say. Originally Posted by ExoticEzra

It can last, at least until it doesn't.

Mongering and providing are the same thing IMHO.

Think about it...

• while the monger mongers, the monger is providing for the provider
• while the provider provides, the provider is most certainly mongering

So the question is, can we stop or has it matured to a full blown addiction for some of us?

I, for one, don't want to be the rrrabbit at an AA meeting saying "I have a problem...".

If we win our class action suit will we each get one of those postcards giving us a $5 discount? Will it be $5 off our favorites, or $5 off a viagra order? (And will we even care? These might be complements for most of us.)

Oh well, at least the lawyers will go away happy.

But I'm optimistic -- I'm already planning on whom to spend my $5 . . .

I believe a monger can quit "mongering" and a provider can quit providing if a monger is satisfied in the monger department and a provider's needs are provided.

I'm just saying, if both peoples needs are met then the answer is yes.

The question is why would you want to stop? It's the greatest hobby a man could have.

I have no need for variety when I'm with someone. It's surprisingly easy to stay away. Originally Posted by blenderhead

I agree with blenderhead.....it is easy to stay away when I am with someone..........for about 60-90 minutes!!!!


Spacemtn
AustinModStaff

Once a monger, always a monger. Jest MHO

depends on who you are inside and why you came here in the first place...

Absolutely yes! Because of two back to back six-month civie relationships I have not hobbied for a year now and have not missed it in the least.

Personally I could never hobby while being involved in a committed relationship. That's just how I'm wired. I've never even cheated. No judgment of others who can.
Another factor is that I never started hobbying out of any emotional need. It was purely for physical gratification with sweet young exotic beautiful chickadees whom I could never likely nail in the civie world. Pure fantasy.
As long as my sexual needs are being met in the civie world there is absolutely no practical use for hobbying to me.

After a recent breakup with the GF I have indeed been intellectually pondering dipping my wick back in the water but the reason I haven't is that I no longer have much desire or heart for it. Now she wants to work things out as a few weeks of absence has given her a new perspective so it looks like I will continue being a monger only on the boards. This is especially the case considering we have always been extremely compatible sexually with No covers required.

So I would say YES! Some mongers can easily quit the hobby depending upon the reason that they are in it.

Absolutely yes! Because of two back to back six-month civie relationships I have not hobbied for a year now and have not missed it in the least.

Personally I could never hobby while being involved in a committed relationship. That's just how I'm wired. I've never even cheated. No judgment of others who can.
Another factor is that I never started hobbying out of any emotional need. It was purely for physical gratification with sweet young exotic beautiful chickadees whom I could never likely nail in the civie world. Pure fantasy.
As long as my sexual needs are being met in the civie world there is absolutely no practical use for hobbying to me.

After a recent breakup with the GF I have indeed been intellectually pondering dipping my wick back in the water but the reason I haven't is that I no longer have much desire or heart for it. Now she wants to work things out as a few weeks of absence has given her a new perspective so it looks like I will continue being a monger only on the boards. This is especially the case considering we have always been extremely compatible sexually with No covers required.

So I would say YES! Some mongers can easily quit the hobby depending upon the reason that they are in it. Originally Posted by Codybeast

I do think that people on both sides can quit for the right reasons, but would question the above quote.

Have you really quit? If you have left the hobby because of the civvie relationship, then why are you continuing to lurk and post here?? Please understand, this is not a shot, but a legit question. I wonder what would happen if she were to find out that you were still reading and occasionally posting on a SHMB?? She (or he depending on the situation) might be able to forgive you for your past activities, but would she (or he) forgive you for the present??

Unlike a lot of people here, I hobby very little, but I am still involved in many aspects so I would have to say that I still fall in the "Monger" classification. IMHO, the only way you truly leave being a Monger is to LEAVE!!

Not suggesting that you need to leave, codybeast(I enjoy your posts and viewpoints), but it is like being pregnant. There is no small involvement, either as a hobbiest or a provider. IJS

Spacemtn
AustinModStaff

I do think that people on both sides can quit for the right reasons, but would question the above quote.

Have you really quit? If you have left the hobby because of the civvie relationship, then why are you continuing to lurk and post here?? Please understand, this is not a shot, but a legit question. I wonder what would happen if she were to find out that you were still reading and occasionally posting on a SHMB?? She (or he depending on the situation) might be able to forgive you for your past activities, but would she (or he) forgive you for the present??

Unlike a lot of people here, I hobby very little, but I am still involved in many aspects so I would have to say that I still fall in the "Monger" classification. IMHO, the only way you truly leave being a Monger is to LEAVE!!

Not suggesting that you need to leave, codybeast(I enjoy your posts and viewpoints), but it is like being pregnant. There is no small involvement, either as a hobbiest or a provider. IJS

Spacemtn
AustinModStaff Originally Posted by Spacemtn

Constructive participation in Board posting on hobby related topics which is fun when bored has ZERO to do with actively hobbying as a monger. Simple as that.
I took the meaning of Monger (As applicable to This thread) as one who actively hires providers period. Not as one who contributes to hobby related threads.
It was my impression that was the intended meaning of the OP. I could be wrong. If monger includes those who simply communicate with those who do then yes I am currently a monger. No problem there. If so the question itself is loaded because the only ones here to answer the question itself are Mongers.

For the record she does know that I've hobbied. There's nothing to forgive in that regard. I doubt she would consider posting cheating although she might not be too keen on it. Then again knowing her she wouldn't mind as long as she could contribute which of course she can't. However the board isn't important enough for me to find out.

Be straight up with what you really mean instead of this wimpy assed passive aggressive BS.

In one breath you say you are Not suggesting I stop posting yet in the same statement you question why I am even bothering to participate.
Contributing constructive insights has Nothing to do with booking sessions as an "Active" monger.
I know for a fact that there are other very active posters here who although they are involved indirectly to the hobby world do Not hire or at least for a very very long stretch did not hire providers while continuing to be the most active posters on the board.

If you are passively hinting I leave the board because I am not actively fucking providers then while it has been fun it would be absolutely no skin off of my nose.
I wouldn't miss posting either so in that sense my original answer to Sixx's question still stands.
Yes some mongers could stop being mongers in a heartbeat. In fact I stopped posting for about a year until the past few months so it is hardly a hardship to stop permanantly.
Ball's in your court. If you would like the posts to discontinue. It's all good. I do have a life. This site for me is pure entertainment when bored and nothing more.