The Pretty Woman Syndrome

Relationships:

Its WHY I hobby. I am not in the position to have an affair in the Real World . Its way too expensive and I couldn't keep two or more women separate in the RW.

In the Hobby World, I can wait for the opportunity to schedule a session off the radarand within the funds I can commit without explanation. When the session is over . . .its OVER. No phone calls the next day, no hurt feelings, no drama. When I can see someone again, a phone call, PM or e-mail sets it up. This separation between RW and HW is what makes it work.


I am sure that I could fall in love with a provider that I met outside the Hobby— if I didn't know she was a provider (people are people first), but . . . .finding that she was a provider would complicate things so much . . .I don't think I could keep it all separated in compartments. As the TV character George Costanzia said, "Its not you, its ME!)

There is a flip side I think. Some of the ladies please jump in here:

If you have had a crazy week (hey, you fill it in I don't know what a crazy week is for you)), are you looking forward to seeing your RW boy friend who has worked hard all week and wants to go away with you for a weekend of wild sex?

Nah. I have yet to meet a provider who could replace my SO in any emotional way, shape or form.

Do they provide a physical aspect she doesn't? Yes. But so far, I've not met any one that could attract me. Most of them that I have seen aren't even well educated...even the ones with higher education degrees. Just sayin'. Originally Posted by charlestudor2005

Well, you need me to introduce you to some ladies.

I can make you a list of extraordinarily well educated ladies who, if they so chose, could play you physically, intellectually and emotionally like they were virtuosos and you were a fine instrument. The only reason they don't do it is they also happen to be highly ethical.

I remember the first time I encountered a provider with those capacities, how stunned I was, and how glad I was that the first criteria I have for providers is their character.

I think that sometimes hobbyists encounter providers with these capacities without even realizing it, or realizing how simple it would be for them to affect the hobbyist far more profoundly at an emotional level than they actually do.

I am by no means saying this phenomenon is ubiquitous; but I seem to have a knack for locating women with that sort of pure feminine power atop formidable intellects.

If you are feeling brave, lemme know.

I've met a couple of ladies that I like...I REALLY like...a lot!

Still, I think I would have to be clubbed over the head by the poor lady to realize that what was happening. Just not the way things are supposed to work here.

If anyone ever gets that delusional.... I'll get back to you about what I did...

Yep, I did it and I should have realized it was a demo (just one long list of many lies). Would I do it again? Not on your life with a provider who still wanted to be in the biz after telling me. Life is way too short to have to deal with all the lies. Crazy in the sheets is one thing but crazy in the head where you have to stand at the door and say “… you taken your meds yet? Let me see… lift your tongue…”

Just not the way things are supposed to work here. Originally Posted by Sisyphus

The best things in life are often not the way things are supposed to work.

Yep, I did it and I should have realized it was a demo (just one long list of many lies). Would I do it again? Not on your life with a provider who still wanted to be in the biz after telling me. Life is way too short to have to deal with all the lies. Originally Posted by PhantomofTheOpera

That is of course the conundrum. The ladies who are successful are supposed to make you feel that good. Figuring out what is real and what is memorex is of course the real challenge. But when it is real it is, IMHO, worth it, whatever the risks are. Relationships are always a risk, whether in demi-land or in civvie (hate that word lol) land.

The best things in life are often not the way things are supposed to work. Originally Posted by discreetgent

I don't disagree, DG. My point was that I would be extremely reluctant to assume/infer something like the scenario from the OP was actually occurring.

If she says it first...that's amazing! If you say it first...you're a stalker!

Figuring out what is real and what is memorex is of course the real challenge. Originally Posted by discreetgent

Boy that quote really dates you DG (and me).

Yeah, getting old happens FAST nowadays! A week ago or so I had a conversation in a store that wandered into the area of classic rock (Hendrics, Joplin and others). At some point I realized that I was the only one there who had heard these artists when they were ALIVE! That was a splash of cold water.

. Figuring out what is real and what is memorex is of course the real challenge. But when it is real it is, IMHO, worth it, whatever the risks are. Relationships are always a risk, whether in demi-land or in civvie (hate that word lol) land. Originally Posted by discreetgent

I don't think its ever happened with an actual client. I know I've never fallen for one. I have a regular friend I see pretty often who I enjoy more than the others, but I don't want to take him home. We both get that I go home to my world, and he's to go home to his.

I also entertained a conversation with a civvie about dating that turned into a bona fide SD offer after I explained what I do. I thought to consider it, but then he ruined it by telling me how he "just couldn't let me go", etc, etc. Too close for comfort.

Well, you need me to introduce you to some ladies.

I can make you a list of extraordinarily well educated ladies who, if they so chose, could play you physically, intellectually and emotionally like they were virtuosos and you were a fine instrument. The only reason they don't do it is they also happen to be highly ethical.

I remember the first time I encountered a provider with those capacities, how stunned I was, and how glad I was that the first criteria I have for providers is their character.

I think that sometimes hobbyists encounter providers with these capacities without even realizing it, or realizing how simple it would be for them to affect the hobbyist far more profoundly at an emotional level than they actually do.

I am by no means saying this phenomenon is ubiquitous; but I seem to have a knack for locating women with that sort of pure feminine power atop formidable intellects.

If you are feeling brave, lemme know.

Originally Posted by Laurentius

a smart woman, when she wants to be, is the most aphrodisiacal thing in the world, and she can do a number on anyone

Well, you need me to introduce you to some ladies.

If you are feeling brave, lemme know.

Originally Posted by Laurentius

OK, PM me with the details.

I don't think its ever happened with an actual client. I know I've never fallen for one. I have a regular friend I see pretty often who I enjoy more than the others, but I don't want to take him home. We both get that I go home to my world, and he's to go home to his.

I also entertained a conversation with a civvie about dating that turned into a bona fide SD offer after I explained what I do. I thought to consider it, but then he ruined it by telling me how he "just couldn't let me go", etc, etc. Too close for comfort. Originally Posted by Nina Rae

"Alex the Reluctant Escort" just blogged about this: http://alexlieberman.wordpress.com/2...ilty-pleasure/

I have a love life, what I don't have is a sex life. I can fix the sex life problem here in the hobby. When I am with a provider that opens up my emotional side and when it is time to leave I feel a sadness and a euphoria at the same time. Sometimes as I am leaving and in our final embrace I will tell them that I love them...for making me feel the way that I do. They are savvy enough to know what that means and it tells them that they/we have accomplished our goal. Convey the illusion of passion and give me an emotional embrace without the hooks of commitment. These are the ladies I see again and again. Maintaining the real emotional distance, yet letting them have a place in my heart would seem to be a paradox. It is however one I can live with tho.
Only once did I let myself become truly infatuated with a provider, we both allowed it to become more than it shold be and fortunately her cooler head prevailed. We are still seeing each other altho on a more infrequent basis.

thank you...i belive you just answered i question i had about myself...
why does an attractive man, who can get beautiful women at anytime, seek providers that are often even less attractvie then a women one could get IRL.

Because I could get sex from civies if I chose; the inducement to get it from providers is what providers will give me that a civie likely won't: a free pass on all the demands a woman would usually attach to sex. Originally Posted by Laurentius