Maintaining Emotional Distance

***Rant warning***

Why is this such a difficult concept in the real world? Why am I an asshole if I happen to like it better when you stand over there? When you don't need anything from me and you're okay if I don't feel like talking tomorrow, or next week, or maybe ever again? Can't you just have genuinely lovely and exciting interactions and then not expect to be coddled?
#endrant

Thank you, men of ECCIE. Most of you are very cool, and some of you are fascinating!


Originally Posted by Alana Fontaine

I understand where you're coming from hon. This is actually a skill that many people don't have because, it has to be learned or you become conditioned to it. I can separate my mind from my pussy and I never invest more than I am "willing" to walk away from. Different strokes for different folks, this works for me. The hobby and RW are 2 different worlds for sure. It's the emotional ones that go batshit crazy because they have special RW needs that they carry over into this hobby, those I can usually smell/read from a mile away.

One of the biggest problems in relationships (of any kind) are when the needs of the two people don't line up well. Everyone has their own set of wants and needs, and finding someone whose needs line up with yours is one of life's great challenges.

In the hobby, the great GFE providers can convince their clients that this happens... for the duration of their session. That's what we're paying for, and that's what we want.

In real life, it's a lot harder, because faking isn't supposed to be part of the deal. If needs are too far out of alignment, it's best (although often difficult) to admit that it wasn't meant to be, and look for a better fit next time.

***Rant warning***

Why is this such a difficult concept in the real world? Why am I an asshole if I happen to like it better when you stand over there? When you don't need anything from me and you're okay if I don't feel like talking tomorrow, or next week, or maybe ever again? Can't you just have genuinely lovely and exciting interactions and then not expect to be coddled?
#endrant

Thank you, men of ECCIE. Most of you are very cool, and some of you are fascinating!


Originally Posted by Alana Fontaine

You all are an outlet for my sexual energy and the reason I get to spend more time with my son, for which I am very grateful.

Pay, Fuck, Leave ... KISS: Keep It Simple, Stupid

You are completely missing the point.

...so I get to be genuinely excited to see them and hear from them, and genuinely relate to them.

I am actually super sweet and put a lot of value on respecting peoples feelings. And I adore my regulars, none of whom I can see myself hurting. Originally Posted by Alana Fontaine

What was the point? (Rhetorical Question!)

***Rant warning***

Why is this such a difficult concept in the real world? Why am I an asshole if I happen to like it better when you stand over there? When you don't need anything from me and you're okay if I don't feel like talking tomorrow, or next week, or maybe ever again? Can't you just have genuinely lovely and exciting interactions and then not expect to be coddled?
#endrant

Thank you, men of ECCIE. Most of you are very cool, and some of you are fascinating!


Originally Posted by Alana Fontaine

Hooker time is just that.. Hooker time. I buy what I need and move on. No getting chummy, small talk or bullshit like that. What I find hilarious is guy who think their ATF is their friend.. Quit paying her and see how long that lasts.

I understand where you're coming from hon. This is actually a skill that many people don't have because, it has to be learned or you become conditioned to it. I can separate my mind from my pussy and I never invest more than I am "willing" to walk away from. Different strokes for different folks, this works for me. The hobby and RW are 2 different worlds for sure. It's the emotional ones that go batshit crazy because they have special RW needs that they carry over into this hobby, those I can usually smell/read from a mile away. Originally Posted by Alyssa XOXO

But But...you said I was special!!!

But But...you said I was special!!! Originally Posted by Goatnipples

Lol you are babe... You already knew that I was only with you for your udders...

You love the udders. It's like teabagging but a bit different.

Do smothering isn't on your menu? Yummy has the sads...double again Originally Posted by YummyMarie

Don't have the Sads Yummy
You need a hug

Hooker time is just that.. Hooker time. I buy what I need and move on. No getting chummy, small talk or bullshit like that. What I find hilarious is guy who think their ATF is their friend.. Quit paying her and see how long that lasts. Originally Posted by bladtinzu

Ha, that applies to real life also!

Any interaction I have with a whore ends right after I ejaculate, NO EXCEPTIONS.

Even if fried chicken is being served after?

In the hobby, the great GFE providers can convince their clients that this happens... for the duration of their session. That's what we're paying for, and that's what we want. Originally Posted by blowpop

Back in around 1999 or 2000, Wayward gave me some words of wisdom.

One thing he stated that relates to what I quoted blowpop saying....paraphrasing here.....is that the best providers are also great actresses.

We pay for the physical enjoyment, but the best providers can also give emotional fulfillment, or at least give the illusion of emotional fulfillment.

Back in around 1999 or 2000, Wayward gave me some words of wisdom.

One thing he stated that relates to what I quoted blowpop saying....paraphrasing here.....is that the best providers are also great actresses.

We pay for the physical enjoyment, but the best providers can also give emotional fulfillment, or at least give the illusion of emotional fulfillment. Originally Posted by DEAR_JOHN

Of course. But your providers typically have small periods of time apart from you in which they can think about you and smile. You focus on your job etc, and when with her you conpletely focus on her and being present to your experience. You are happy, independent of your providers, who enrich your life and add to your happiness. For those of us who truly like being providers, all of that should work in the opposite direction. Being that we are real women, yes there is emotional fulfillment in this for some of us. It's not always an act. There are people who appreciate all that much more having no restrictions on or expectations of another person and having them return. Giving others that freedom opens a whole new realm of appreciation for time shared!