Let me start by saying my opinions are MINE and don't represent the "guy" collective. i would have a relationship with a (active) provider on the condition if I did fuck someone else, its not cheating...
Bottom line, my mythical provider GF would get to FUCK other guys/girls. The fact she gets money and/or gifts for that is great BUT SHE'S actively fucking someone else. How then can she be upset when I do the same???? I'd be expected to have the perspective that a stray dick in her mouth, and someone else fucking her while fingering Greece is a just the "job"??? And I should suck it up and NOT indulge in seeking some strange for myself??? OK...
I'm not making an attempt to slut shame anyone as I'm in the Man-Slut Hall of Fame but the expectation of one-sided monogamy is ridiculously unrealistic IMO.
Originally Posted by Frique-Me
You're entitled to your opinion - and lord knows there are many men who share it with you - so I suppose on this front we'll just have to agree to disagree.
You can't see that it's a job (for some of us, at least) and I find your equation of my work to your civvy liaisons a bit disingenuous, but so long as you were up-front with your expectations to your mythical provider GF then that's your business. *shrugs*
Whenever I've been in a relationship while providing - and I've tried your method, though it doesn't work for me - I've been up front about my expectations for monogamy. Though you may call it unrealistic, there are men out there (and women) who are willing to be monogamous with a sex worker...and those relationships can be quite fulfilling for both parties. It's not all about sex, y'know.
And so long as you communicate your expectations to your partner so they can make informed consent then that's the important part, right?
Some are trying misconstrue what I'm saying.
If a woman is having sex all day then comes home from "work" she's not going to be a very good lay for her husband.
If you're marrying someone and the best you can get is sloppy-seconds or thirds or fourths, then I think most men wouldn't like it. Aside from being the last the girl will be tired and worn out every day, she likely will not want to have sex after she's "worked" all day.
Originally Posted by Trill Jackson
Not trying to misconstrue, though misunderstandings may occur. If that's the case, then my apologies.
I think my problem with your statement is that you're assuming all providers are "having sex all day" so anyone who partners with us is getting "sloppy-seconds or thirds or fourths," which often isn't true.
If I (hypothetically) had one session at 0900 and my partner didn't get home until 1700, how is that so much different than if I got up and had a self-pleasuring session that morning? Does it make such a difference if it's a real dick versus a silicone one?
And hell, when I was doing the relationship thing I'd often come home from an appointment all fired up and ready to jump whoever I was with - work is often enjoyable, but there's little as good as sex with someone who knows just how to push your buttons. We're not nearly as "worn out" at the end of the day as you may think.
I do think, however, that I'm not going to find common understanding with you or Frique so...*shrugs*